Then, you know, it was all over the news when we got home on Sunday. I was up in my room doing my nails and my mom goes, Ashley! Ashley! Come down here! Usually I ignore her but she sounded all weird so I went downstairs. She had the news on and this helmet-haired woman reporter was standing in front of Chelsey’s house with a microphone and talking super-seriously about the tragic death of some girl who had been found in this really skeevy neighborhood over on the east side with her head smashed in. At first I didn’t get it. I’m thinking, why is she standing outside Chelsey’s house? But then my mom grabbed my hand and put her other hand over her mouth and I realized — they must be talking about Chelsey. Because she doesn’t have any sisters, you know? Didn’t, I mean.
So then Helmet Head was talking to Chelsey’s mom, who was, like, beside herself, obviously, and then they did that camera shot they do where they show the body from the knees down because they can’t really show the body — I think that is the grossest, why do they do that? Just show the feet, I mean? Do they think we don’t believe that somebody’s dead if they don’t show part of the body? I felt really sick and freaked out, so I ran back upstairs. Then my mom was knocking on my door and saying, Ashley, honey? in a tone of voice she hasn’t used since I was, like, nine, but I told her to go away and she did.
Then of course Madison called and she was all, oh my God, and then Lauren called and she was like, oh my God. She was crying and saying how she wished she had seen Chelsey again after the party, and how weird it was that the last thing she said to Chelsey was something totally dumb like, can I borrow your coat, and she wished she’d said something else instead. After that I called Tanner because I was kind of worried about him, and he said almost the same exact thing, about how he wished he had seen Chelsey after the party and that you just never know when the last time you see someone will be. He got kind of choked up, which I thought was really touching at the time but now really pisses me off, and frankly is one of the reasons I’m here at all.
So Sunday really sucked, as you can imagine. I was laying in bed that night thinking about the report on TV and I got this really anxious feeling, like there was something that my mind was trying to tell me but I didn’t really want to know. I know that doesn’t really make sense, but that was the feeling, just really weird, like part of me was saying, think about this, and another part was saying, don’t think about it, don’t think about it. But I couldn’t sleep so I did think about it, about everything I’d seen on the TV. I got this totally freaked-out feeling because I realized what I’d seen and heard earlier but had been too upset to really understand. It was two things, actually.
First, there was that interview with Chelsey’s mother, who was totally crying and saying, I can’t believe she’s gone, her room looks like she could walk in any moment, her schoolbooks are on her desk, her purse is on her dresser, and her favorite jacket is on her chair. Because I know damn well Chelsey’s favorite jacket is the green jacket that was in Tanner’s Jeep and Tanner said he hadn’t seen her after the party, so how did she get her coat back? But then I was like, chill out, Ashley, maybe her mom thinks a different jacket is her favorite jacket, because you never know if parents have a clue or not, you know? But the second thing was worse. I was thinking about that awful shot of Chelsey’s legs and feet, how they were sort of facing down and one was kind of turned in, and just how creepy that whole thing was, and I realized, she was totally wearing the wrong shoes. She was wearing a pair of beige low-heeled sandals just like the ones Lupe bought at Wal-Mart, and Chelsey would not be caught dead — I mean, would never wear those ugly Wal-Mart shoes.
I couldn’t get the jacket and the shoes out of my head. So Monday morning I went over to Chelsey’s house and rang the bell, and her mom answered and she just looked like absolute shit, and I felt pretty bad myself for bothering her. But I gave her a big hug and told her how sorry I was, and then I said that Chelsey had borrowed my math homework on Friday and I needed it back, which was a total lie. Chelsey’s mom sent me up to her room to get my fake homework and sure enough — there was Chelsey’s green leather jacket hanging off the back of her desk chair. So then I knew that Tanner had totally lied to me, but I couldn’t think why. I can’t tell you why I didn’t just ask him, either, except that I knew that something was way wrong with his story and I guess that made me not trust him. I left Chelsey’s and went to school and Madison was all teary and upset, and so was Lauren, and Tanner looked just awful. And everyone at school was like, oh my God, you guys, we’re so sorry, and I think some of them were but, you know, some of them totally weren’t. So I basically kept to myself all day. But then, on my way to Applied Design after lunch? I came around the corner by the art rooms and there were Lauren and Tanner, hiding in this little alcove and making out big time. And I was like, oh my God. I just turned and walked away real fast, but Lauren chased after me and she was all, Ashley, Ashley, it’s not what you think, we’re just both so sad. And I go, my God, Lauren, Chelsey hasn’t been dead a whole day, and she goes, I’m sorry, Ashley! It’s not what it looks like! And I go, really? Because it looked like you had your tongue down his throat. She didn’t say anything else, so I just left. “Not what it looked like” — it was exactly what it looked like, which was something hot and in progress, not friends comforting each other and not their first kiss.
After school I went home and turned on Oprah but I really wasn’t watching it, I was kind of freaking out about Lauren and Tanner, plus I was trying not to think about the jacket and the shoes, but then Lauren called me and asked me to come over. My mom was totally hovering, which was bugging the shit out of me, so even though I was pretty pissed at Lauren, I went over. We went out by the pool to talk because Consuelo was in the kitchen, and Lauren said she wanted to explain about her and Tanner, about how they’d never done that sort of thing before, which of course was total bullshit but I didn’t feel like getting into it with her so I was like, whatever. I was looking off in the other direction and I said, hey, what happened to the see-no-evil monkey? Because it was missing from the pillar. She said she banged into the pillar on Saturday night and the monkey fell off and broke into a bunch of pieces, and she knew her dad would have been totally ticked with her except that he felt bad for her because of Chelsey. I go, it’s lucky the monkey didn’t break the floor tiles, and she goes, yeah, that was lucky.
Right then I knew. I don’t know how I did, but I did. So then I had to get out of there because I was sure I was looking at Lauren really oddly and I didn’t know if I could act normal, so I just was like, whatever, Lauren, I have to go home. I could hardly sleep last night, which is, like, two nights in a row, but I decided that instead of going to school today I would come down here and ask to speak to whoever was investigating Chelsey’s death. So here we are, sitting in this pea-green little room. And you’ve got to believe me: Even though I can’t explain why I’m so sure, I think I can tell you what happened. But then you guys will have to prove it.
Here’s what I think happened: Tanner stopped by Chelsey’s house to give her back her jacket and one or the other of them said, let’s go over to Lauren’s house to swim because it’s so hot. Lauren’s parents weren’t there, they were playing bridge at Madison’s house. So then Lauren and Chelsey and Tanner were all over at Lauren’s house and something happened and Chelsey caught on that Tanner was totally stepping out on her with Lauren. Maybe those two were off kissing in a corner like they did at school, I don’t know. But that would totally piss Chelsey off, I mean she would have gone postal about it. Then I think she was probably screaming at them both and telling Tanner that when the school found out he cheated on the U.S. Government exam there was no way he would get into West Point. She probably told him that she could prove it, because she probably still had the answer key, which only he could have snagged from Mrs. Chelmiak’s desk. And she totally would have done it, too, because she is vicious when she’s pissed. Nice One, my ass. Then one or the other of them hit her with that stupid monkey. Because you know what? That monkey was made of stone, not cement, and if it fell off its pillar it might chip but it wouldn’t break into pieces, anyone could tell you that. But it sure would have broken the tile floor, which wasn’t broken at all.