“Honestly? Because I thought we could still work shit out. We have a life together, and we have Amelia. Walking away with no fight at all felt like I was throwing that away.”
“Joey, you’ve treated me like shit for years now. You’ve been an awful husband. You drove me so far down into a depression that I was sure I’d never be able to claw my way out. To be blunt, you ruined just about every good part of my life. If it wasn’t for Amelia…” I trailed off, unable to finish my sentence. I’d never really dealt with the depth of my depression over the last few years, and I certainly wasn’t going to talk about it with Joey.
“I’m sorry,” he said simply.
“Sorry isn’t good enough. I think we both know that,” I said.
“I know.” He sighed. “So, what happens now?”
“Now, we move on from each other. We file for divorce—together. Amelia needs both of us in her life, and things will be so much simpler if we work together to make that happen.”
“You’re really not going to try to take her from me?” he asked skeptically. “Especially after today?”
I shook my head. “She’s your child, too, Joey. I wouldn’t do that unless you started treating her the way you treated me. The way I see it, you’re gone all week. I can have her then, and you can have her every weekend.”
He nodded. “I think that’s our best option. What happens if I find work locally and can spend more time with her?”
“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it,” I told him.
“This is really it, isn’t it?” he asked. There was no anger in his voice, only defeat.
“Yeah, it really is,” I said.
For a moment, I felt a pang of sympathy for not just him, but for myself as well. We’d spent years together, growing from teenagers into adults. We’d transitioned into this world of adulthood together.
“We had some good times, Joey, but the bad outweighed the good. Now, we can both move forward and find happiness.”
“I want us to be friends. Is that even possible?”
I hesitated before answering, “Yes, I think it’s possible, but it will take time. I’ve spent so long hating you that it’s all I know. For now, I think we should just aim for being cordial with each other, especially where Amelia is concerned.”
“It’s a start,” he said.
“It is,” I said. “Why don’t I come over to the apartment tomorrow, and we’ll fill out the paperwork together? We can file next week.”
“All right,” he said as he pushed away from the banister. “I guess that’s my cue to make myself scarce, isn’t it?”
I grinned. “Yes, I believe it is.”
He stood there awkwardly for a moment before nodding and turning away. I watched him walk down the porch steps and across the lawn to where his car was parked.
As he started the car and pulled away, I felt a tiny bit of loss. Deep, deep, deep down, Joey was a good man. Unfortunately, he’d lost that part of himself somewhere along the way. I hoped that he could find it one day and be the kind of man I’d always hoped he could be.
I sat out on the porch swing long after his car had disappeared from view, my mind too full to think of anything else but the way my life had changed so dramatically in such a short amount of time.
It was dark when the front door swung open. Ethan stepped out and walked over to the porch swing. He was silent as he sat down next to me. I noticed that he’d found a new clean shirt, free of blood. From the size of it, it looked like my father had loaned it to him. That made me smile. If my dad approved of Ethan, I knew I’d have no problem with my mother.
“Joey and I are over,” I told him after a while. “He has agreed to the divorce. I’m going over to the apartment tomorrow to fill out all the papers with him.”
“How do you feel?” Ethan asked.
I shrugged. “Relieved. A little bit sad, too. I mean, we’re both walking away from years we’ve spent together. That’s hard to swallow.”
“You have every right to be sad,” Ethan said. “But just know that you’re definitely not alone in this. You have me. Your dad is there for you, too.”
“I know, and I’m thankful for both of you. I hope you know that.”
He smiled. “I know.”
“Maybe, one day, my mom will come around, too. But I’m not holding my breath on that one.”
“I don’t know. The way she was muttering about Joey, you might just have her on your side, too.”
“It has been a crazy day full of surprises. Maybe she’ll shock me and actually be decent,” I mused. “Still, I can’t wait to get away from this house. It’s only a matter of time before one of us kills the other.”
Ethan laughed. “She can’t be that bad.”
“You just wait. You’re going to be around her a lot more now. You’ll see what I’m talking about.”
We fell silent, both of us simply enjoying each other’s company and the moment of peace after so much havoc today. After a while, I knew it was time to go inside.
I looked over at Ethan, a shocking revelation crossing my mind. “You’ve never met Amelia, have you?”
He shook his head. “No. Well, I saw her today for the first time, if that counts.”
“It doesn’t. Come on, I’ll introduce you to each other.”
I laced my fingers through his as we stood. I led the way back inside and to the living room.
Amelia was lying in my mother’s lap, eating her evening bottle. My mother’s eyes fell to my hands linked with Ethan’s, but for once, she kept silent. I let go of Ethan and walked over to Amelia. My mother stood and handed her off to me.
“I need to go check on dinner,” she said before leaving the room.
My father stood and followed her out without a word. I knew they would question me about what had happened with Joey, but for now, they were giving me time alone with Ethan, something I very much appreciated.
“Sit down with me,” I said as I settled down onto the couch with Amelia on my lap.
Ethan cautiously sat next to me.
“Amelia, meet Ethan,” I said as I carefully handed her over to him.
His entire body was stiff as he took her into his arms.
“You don’t have to sit so stiffly. You’re not going to hurt her, and I promise she won’t hurt you.”
He relaxed his body a tiny bit. “Better?”
“Much.” I grinned.
“Hi, Amelia. I’ve heard a lot about you,” he joked as he looked down at my daughter in his arms.
She started to fuss, and a look of terror crossed his face. I grinned as I handed her bottle to him.
“She’s hungry.”
“Oh, right,” he muttered as he held the bottle so that she could suckle on it.
She instantly attacked it.
He laughed. “I guess she really was hungry.”
“She’s always hungry. I think she gets that from me,” I joked.
He glanced over at me before returning his attention to the baby on his lap. “She’s beautiful.”
“Yes, she is.”
A smile covered my face as I watched Amelia and Ethan for the first time. It was strange to see two of the most important people in my life together at last.
Since I’d reconnected with Ethan, he’d been separate from my normal life. I wasn’t sure that I’d ever expected him to meet Amelia face-to-face. Now that he was, it was like my two separate lives were now crashing together, becoming one.
My smile widened. I liked the sound of that.
“Caley,” a voice whispered close by.
I moaned and opened my eyes to see my mother staring at me.
“Hmm?” I asked, still half-asleep.
“I made up the guest bedroom for your friend. You might want to wake him up. If he sleeps on the couch after the beating he took today, he’ll definitely be stiff in the morning.”