'I won't', I said too quickly, and she shook her head.
'Betwixt tenderness and boldness is a pleasant path, Emily. Men grapple with one sometimes, force one over. In particular in youth they do, and gain the measure of your bottom or your slit, sometimes by forcing, sometimes wheedling in a foolish way-or sometimes after birching one. Many a girl has flowered upon an urgent cock that way, and is no worse for it. Once it is done, it's done. There come the heaving sighs, the pants-the sperm releases and the honeypot receives.
Remember how I told you… up against the wall? It teased both him and me, my drawers-yes, drawers!- down to my knees, my thighs not quite apart as he had wished, my dress held up just like a little girl who's made to show for the first time. Awkward it was, yet thrilling-I can tell you that. His nose was thrust between my breasts. I held him tightly as he came. Afterwards I scolded him, for that is what he really likes, and looks most mournful till you cuddle him again'.
I listened fascinated to her words. They led me also into corridors of thought beyond my own-into the heads of others, so to speak. One thinks of one's own pleasures mainly, not of others. That's the pity of world, though pleasures must be mutual, of course. I said such to her, and she gave as much thought to my words as I had to hers. 'There are many ways to reach the peaks of pleasure, Emily.
I thought it very naughty when my uncle made me raise my skirts, wanted to close my legs and hide myself. In the first moment that he put his cock to me, I felt a terror and would have resisted had he not been implacable and held my hips so tightly while he urged it up.
Pleasure does not come at the first touch always. I mean, at the first touch to mind or body-don't you see?' 'Jane… I mean, Myrtle… she was whipped', I said. I said it to provoke; I knew I did.
'Jane is her real name? Good. I'm glad you told me that. I know both your names now. Yes, mine is Elizabeth! If Jane were whipped then I have no doubt she needed it, within herself I mean. Girls sometimes must be made to do that which they never otherwise would do. Boys, too, occasionally!', she laughed, and told me how her brother had been spanked when they were young and how his prick had got quite stiff until their governess had teased him off and made him spurt across her stocking tops. 'Well-you have all my secrets now', I said, and rose to go. 'I have gathered all the roses from your mind… and the buds, too?', she teased. 'Come to me whenever you have a problem, Emily. I promise you that I will do the same'. 'Oh, but I do not know enough to counsel you!' 'You know more than you think, my pet. Dwell on the moment that my husband mounted you. You did not quaver, howl or kick. Quite properly you took his prick. Dwell on the moment when you refused your tastings, and quite properly. 'Twas clever of you, that, and made you even more desirable in such eyes as would have uncovered your sweet thighs and bottom. Dwell on the moment when your Papa found you with your drawers down and should have swept his hand up underneath your skirt'. 'Oh! Elizabeth!', I gasped.
'Oho! You had not thought of it before?', she teased, and with a fond kiss I departed. Dear Elizabeth-she could say almost anything to me, and never raised my hackles ever once. Scarce had my carriage gone a mile than the horses began to slow and I looked out, gliding my window down to see why we were stopping. There, ahead, sat Jenkins on a horse, his hand held up. Wheeling his steed, he came alongside and looked down on my enquiring face. 'A fair day, Miss'. 'You followed me', I said and was about to tell my driver to go on when Jenkins leaned down from his horse and held the windowsill.
'Forgive me-for you know the truth of my identity, I know. I wished but to apologise'. 'Oh? Why to me? Am I the fairest of them all?', I sneered. 'You have the softest voice, the loveliest of limbs. Fairest of form and face you are indeed-and I your servitor, your true one now. Pray, will you not take tea with me, or something a trifle stronger, wine perhaps? My house…' 'I do not wish…' I halted back my words, conserved my smile. 'I am expected back', I said, and thought that for a silly thing to say. It meant that someone other was directing me. I did not wish to be seen to be in his eyes, nor any other man's. -'A half an hour. That is all that I will allow you', I then said, and half despite myself. My bottom tingled just a little still from the boy's prick, or else my imagination made me think it so. 'Thank you. A thousand thanks! Then I will lead the coachman. It is but a short ride on from here. A half an hour in heaven will be worth a year on earth', he said, but looked more timourous than pleased, the actor in him or the hidden man emerging.
Both, perhaps. I was thankful that we did not have to speak again during the interval that passed, the hedges flashing green beneath my eyes, my consciousness of him upon the saddle, broad. And that enormous… No… I should not dwell on that, I thought-but not to dwell on something is, as Papa has since said to me, like having a monkey on one's shoulder that one wishes to ignore, but cannot for it moves this way and that and makes its presence ever felt.
Charles. I would call him Charles, in a cold tone. Would sit, cup held, and little finger curled, would act Miss Prim and put him off his sport…
Such were my ponderings, and yet how hard it is to put on a face, a voice, one does not have. The mind moves on to neutral ground and waits, as mine did on arrival. A fair mansion was it, lying back in its own acres. Over a hundred, as he told me proudly over tea. I had insisted on the tea. Wine would have meant conviviality. The drawing room was plain-had little of a woman's touch. Among the likenessess upon the mantelpiece I saw one of two girls and asked, as coyly as I might, were these his daughters? 'Yes', he said, I biting back a smile, for Aramintha had not told him all. 'They are pretty-very pretty'. I got up to look at them, and heard him move as I expected, coming up behind me till my bottom nestled to his loins. 'No more than you-the fairest of the three', said he. I squeezed my eyes up tight, then opened them, but did not turn my head.
'Mama is still away?', I asked, and heard the catching of his breath. The room was still, the room was still. 'Yes', he said thickly, palmed my hips and felt their curves. 'For long?', I asked-a catch in my own voice. He could not breathe-I swear he could not breathe. I felt the tautness of his chest, the stirrings of his penis through his trouser cloth. 'For long enough to bed you as I wish, my dear, my dearest little pet', he husked and with that groaned and cupped my bulbing tits, feeling the flesh warm through my thin grey gown. I drooped my head and stood as one forlorn.
'I want to see Mama. Oh, Papa, you must not', I whined. My nipples budded to his fingers then, already stiffened to his fingers.
'I beg you to stand still a moment thus, letting me hold your breasts, my sweet-I beg you to. Ah-press your darling bottom in. Can you not feel-can you not feel my…' 'No! Oh no! Oh no, it's rude, Papa. If Mama came…' I burst from him, spun past his shoulder and sat down again in a deep chair and covered up my face. 'She will not-that I swear!' He fell upon his knees and clasped my own. I clipped my thighs together and then peeped between face-cupping fingers. Timidly he moved my dress up almost to my knees, then stopped. 'She may', I mumbled. Suddenly I sensed the subtle invitations that he needed-read the words that haunted his dark eyes. -'She would find you kissing me', I said, 'and putting your hand up where you did before, trying to pull my drawers down-yes-you know you did. I was all a-tremble, knew not what to do'. 'Before she came, or after?' 'Both'. I bit my lip and lowered both my hands, gazing as if in frozen embarrassment as he eased his hands up far beneath my skirt and laid them gently on my silky thighs. 'Don't, Papa, no', I said between clenched teeth, yet did not make to thrust his hands away. 'Just open them, my love, and let me see your furry treasure.' 'No, no, Papa! You dare! What wicked things you say! Mama! Oh, don't!', I squealed. To my astonishment he then fell back, half fallen on his hip, restored himself, but stayed upon his knees, his prick a massive bulge beneath his cloth. A sob escaped him and he covered up his face. His sobs were real; I sensed them to be so and sat bemused. His shoulders shook. Real tears ran down his face. 'Oh, Papa, don't', I murmured and leaned forward then and touched his head-felt timourous and quite dismayed. His hands fell slowly from his face. A teardrop glistened just beside his mouth.