“That’s not the reason we don’t bond,” Thrace said, glad to change the subject. “The real reason has to do with our history—our heritage. We actually were Kindred at one time—the father of our race was, anyway. Until he changed his DNA.”
“He what?” Trin settled on the side of his cot, her eyes wide with interest. “Why would he do that?”
“He was trying to eradicate his need to bond with a female.” Thrace was glad to tell her—glad to talk about anything but his past. “You see, his bride had left him for another and he was bitter and angry about it.”
“What? But if they were bonded—”
“She was one of the unbondable—a Y’lyn. They are females of surpassing beauty but they’re half demon and have no soul. You can’t form a soul-bond with a being who has nothing to bond with. So when she tired of him, she left. And Havoc—that was his name— Kern Havoc—swore to rid himself and all his descendants of the need to bond with a female which is the Kindred’s most singular trait.”
“And did he?” Trin was hanging on his words, plainly very interested.
“Not completely,” Thrace admitted. “He managed to wipe out our ability to dream share—that is, for our minds to align with the female who is supposedly perfect for us. The one who is chosen by the ‘Goddess.’” He sneered at the idea.
Picking up on his tone, Trin frowned.
“You talk about the Goddess as though you don’t believe in her. My people certainly do.”
“I don’t,” Thrace said grimly. “After the life I’ve led…the things that have happened…if there is an all powerful Goddess somewhere controlling things, she’s got a hell of a lot to answer for.”
“So now you and all the other descendants of Kern Havoc stay away from females unless you have the urge to mate?” She nodded at his shaft, which had gone down some as they talked of other things. “Like animals?”
Thrace gave her a fierce grin.
“Exactly like animals. Does that make you feel better about chaining me up like a naughty pet?”
Trin stiffened and sat up straighter.
“I didn’t chain you up for piddling on the carpet or tearing up the furniture. I chained you up because you proved yourself to be dangerous.”
“And you haven’t given me a chance to prove otherwise,” Thrace challenged her.
“What would you do if I let you up?” she demanded. “Run away? Or worse, try to take over my ship? Kill my crew or turn them off onto a desolate waste planet?”
“I told you—I don’t hurt females,” Thrace growled.
Trin shook her head in disbelief.
“I can’t risk it, no matter what you say. I fear no male but I’d be a fool not to have a healthy respect for anyone of your size and obvious physical strength.”
“Would it do any good to swear to you that I wouldn’t hurt you?” Thrace demanded. “I’ll take an oath on anything or anyone you want—even your precious Goddess. Then would you take the word of a slave? A male?”
“Not likely,” she shot back. “The daughters of Zetta Prime don’t trust males any more than you Havoc trust females.”
“So I’m stuck.” Thrace couldn’t keep the bitterness from his voice. “How long will you keep me chained to this damn cot? How will I ever earn your trust if you don’t let me up?”
“Easy.” Her eyes flashed. “Tell me what happened to your last master.”
So they were back to that. Back to his past. Back to the filthy memories he couldn’t quite seem to bury again.
“No,” he said flatly, glaring at her.
“Thrace…” Her voice softened. “I just want the truth. I need to know what happened. If you’d just tell me honestly—”
“If I told you honestly about my past, you’d be twice as horrified and scared of me as you are now,” he snapped.
Trin’s eyes widened but she spoke in a low, steady voice.
“I’m not scared of you.”
Thrace gave a harsh laugh. “If you weren’t, you’d let me go.”
“That’s not why you’re still in manacles and you know it,” Trin snapped. “I’m not unchaining you until I find out what you did to your last master. I want the truth, Thrace. Otherwise, I’ll never be able to trust you.”
He shifted restlessly.
“Then I guess you’ll never trust me and I’ll spend the rest of my life chained to this damn bed.”
“It doesn’t have to be like this,” Trin said softly…almost coaxingly. “Please, Thrace…” She put a hand on his bare chest but he jerked away from her—as much as he could, anyway.
“I’m done talking about this. Fuck you.” He turned his eyes to the wall, refusing to look at her. He’d be damned if he unearthed the pain and shame of the past just to satisfy her morbid curiosity. She might hold the key to his body but his mind was still his own and it was damn well going to stay that way.
“Fine,” Trin said crisply, withdrawing her hand. She sounded slightly hurt. He hadn’t flinched from her touch in days. In fact, he’d come to look forward to it. But Thrace felt he couldn’t stand it now—couldn’t stand to be held down one more second. And yet here he was, still chained to this fucking cot. It was more than he could bear.
“If that’s the way you want to be, you can forgo the bath until I get back,” Trin said when he didn’t speak.
“Don’t do me any favors,” Thrace snarled, glaring up at her. “I’m only a pet anyway. Just leave me here in my fucking kennel and go.”
Trin’s lush lips narrowed to a thin line but she didn’t reply to his remark. Instead, with quick, economical movements, she tucked his shaft away and fastened his trousers. Then she picked up the basin of now cold water, turned and left him to brood silently in the tiny room which was his prison.
* * * * *
Trin didn’t know why she was so upset. Why should she let anything the big Havoc said get to her? He was rude and crude and clearly uncivilized. And the things he’d said he fantasized about doing to her…
Just thinking of them made Trin blush. She considered herself a fairly worldly person but she’d never heard sexual desire stated so bluntly. If another female had spoken so to her…but no, a female wouldn’t have. Not one from Zetta Prime, anyway.
Sex on her home planet was highly ritualized with social protocols which had to be followed for even the most minute relationship advancements. A pair of females beginning a courtship might take five months before they felt ready to hold hands and another five before the first kiss could be ceremoniously given and accepted. Years might pass before a declaration of love and fidelity was made and even more years before any kind of penetration.
That made her think again of the long, hard shaft between Thrace’s muscular legs. She’d never seen it grow so big before—it almost reminded her of her stallion, Swift when he was eager to mount Silk.
For a moment she had nearly offered to help him…although in what way she could help she didn’t really care to speculate. She certainly wasn’t going to climb aboard him and allow him to penetrate her as Swift penetrated Silk—a phenomenon she’d observed once or twice in the course of her time as their owner.
Oh yes, she’d seen penetration before—she’d simply never equated the idea with herself. Not as the one being penetrated, anyway. When two females on Zetta Prime made a life-pact with each other and agreed to penetration, they generally used slim, silver wands which were made for that exclusive purpose. One of the females was the penetrator and one the penetratee. Trin had sometimes wondered what the silver wand might feel like—even though she knew in her heart she could never allow herself to be penetrated.
But a silver wand no bigger than two of her fingers was one thing. She couldn’t even imagine trying to fit something the size of Thrace’s shaft inside herself. Just the thought made her feel hot and cold and wrong all over. The daughters of Zetta Prime did not do such things—not with males. It was forbidden…disgusting. Wasn’t it?