He let out a deep breath, and it slid over her mouth and tickled her nose.
“I know what you thought, Georgia, but I will not have sex with a woman who is angry, hurt, and who just finished humiliating me. This lowly construction worker has higher standards than that.”
With that, he turned on his heel, leaving her standing in the barn with her shirt, no shorts, and what little dignity she thought she had broken in pieces.
Chapter Fourteen
It was 5:30 a.m., and Shelly hadn’t gotten any sleep at all.
After she had gone back to the house, all the lights had been turned off, and it had been so quiet, you could have dropped a pin and heard it land. She had made her way upstairs and had been precariously close to knocking on Josh’s door. But, after her performance tonight, she didn’t think he would have welcomed her.
Instead, she had gone into her empty bedroom and climbed into a cold bed.
What the hell was I thinking, bringing him home with me? He didn’t know me, my problems, and more to the point, my family. Maybe that had been the whole point. She was finally realizing that she wanted him to know all of it.
A little happier with that conclusion, Shelly climbed out of bed and got ready to face the day. She needed to remind Josh that he wanted her, and then she would show him why he should like her.
Putting on a different pair of Daisy Dukes that were faded at the pockets, she paired it with a flowy white shirt that had long loose sleeves. Tucking in the shirt at her small waist, she then framed it with a brown leather belt. Leaving her blonde hair down, she pulled on her cowgirl boots and made her way downstairs.
When she reached the kitchen, she heard some movement and made her way toward it. Shelly stopped, waiting quietly at the door, and watched as her mother stood in front of the large bay windows that overlooked the back lot, scrubbing the big pots she must have used last night.
Her mother was humming softly as she worked with her hands in the sudsy water.
Shelly walked over toward her, and as her boots hit the tile, her mother turned to look over her shoulder. Stopping mid-stride, Shelly locked eyes with this woman whom she loved more than anyone else, even though the woman always managed to let her down in some fundamental way.
“Good mornin’, Shelly,” her mother said softly as she turned back to the sink. Gone was the use of “Shel,” which meant she was in trouble.
Sidling up beside her mother, she took the hand towel hanging over the rail and started to dry the dishes.
“Morning, Ma.”
The silence was awful.
It stretched and tightened like a taut rope with each breath Shelly took. Finally, when the air was pretty much suffocating her, Shelly asked, “So, where’s Father?”
Without looking her way, Shelly’s mother answered, “Your Father got called into the hospital. He’ll be gone most of the day.”
Before she thought better of it, Shelly muttered, “Typical.”
She heard the pot clang down, hitting the bottom of the stainless steel sink, as her mother whipped her head around to face her.
“What on earth has gotten into you, Shelly Monroe?” she demanded, taking a deep breath before shaking her head. Softly, in a tone that almost sounded defeated, she whispered, “I don’t remember raising such a rude and cruel young lady.”
Shelly couldn’t bring herself to look at her mother, so she continued staring out the window at nothing in particular.
“What did you hope to achieve with your lil’ performance last night?” her mother asked quietly. Her country accent was still present, but it was not as obvious when her emotions were tense. Her tone clipped and curt.
Swallowing, Shelly turned to look at the small lady beside her. She shrugged slowly, not wanting to speak.
“Not only did you embarrass yourself, but you managed to humiliate that lovely young man you brought here to meet us.” She paused and picked up the pot out of the sink, rinsing the suds from it before placing it in the drainer.
Finally, Shelly decided she needed to say something. “I just can’t stand the way he treats you, Ma.”
“That is none of your business, Shelly,” her mother stressed, looking at Shelly with annoyed eyes. Her mother blinked slowly and shook her head. Once again, her annoyance and disappointment were evident on her face. “Your opinion on my marriage does not count. Do ya hear me? And it certainly did not need to be announced across the dinner table in front of a guest.” She paused breathing hard. “For all your father has done to me in the past, he’s never humiliated me on purpose, like the way you did last night. He is discreet and—”
“And cheats!” Shelly yelled back. “He cheats on you, Ma! Over and over again. How can you let him keep coming back?”
Throwing the sponge into the sink, her mother wiped her hands and turned to face her daughter full on. Shelly straightened her spine, preparing for whatever was about to come her way.
For years, she had watched this woman let her husband emotionally destroy her. Shelly couldn’t comprehend why her mother let him get away with it for so many years.
“I will say this once, and then you’re to never speak of it with me again. Do I make myself clear?”
Shelly sharply nodded once and waited.
“Your father and I met when I was sixteen years old. Sixteen, Shelly. We dated and fell in love. It was wonderful, full of flowers an’ rainbows. That’s the way you think it should be, am I right?” She paused, and her shoulders slumped a little. Stepping closer to Shelly, she reached out and ran a finger down her daughter’s cheek. “You look so much like him.”
“Don’t.” Shelly muttered, pulling her face away from the touch. “I wish I looked nothing like him.”
Her mother shook her head. “I don’t. I look at you, Shel, and I see all the goodness that he was. When we fell in love, life was easy. We were young and had the rest of our lives ahead of us. But then, we grew up, and life changed. He went into a grueling medical program, and I got pregnant.”
“I’m so sorry,” Shelly snapped.
“Stop it,” her mother told her firmly, the strong Southern woman making an appearance. “Stop being so angry at him. I chose this life, Shelly. Me—not him. He has told me on numerous occasions that he’d look after me if I wanted to move on, but Shelly, I don’t want to. This is my life. It’s where you grew up not wanting or needing anything, and he’s my friend.”
Shaking her head, Shelly stood there looking at her mother, but all she could see was a stranger. Suddenly, everything crumbled down around Shelly’s shoulders. All the anger she had held for her father, thinking that he was the one destroying her mother’s dignity and her good name, now seemed misplaced. It had been her mother’s choice to stay this whole time. Shelly’s heart seemed to be splitting inside her chest. She felt pure betrayal from the woman who loved and raised her, teaching her to respect herself at all costs. How can someone voluntarily stay with a man who doesn’t want you?
“A friend?” Shelly finally sputtered. “He’s your husband, Ma. He’s supposed to love you and look after you and—”
“He does all of that,” she replied, taking a step closer.
She reached up and took Shelly’s face between her small palms. “Your father fell out of love with me a long time ago, Shelly. I know that because he told me. The problem is that I will always love him, so I’ll take any part of him I can. Friendship and companionship are what he offered—not to mention, stability for you.”
Shelly blinked once and felt her eyes welling up. “That’s no way to live, Ma. Everyone else gets to be happy except you? Don’t you want someone who loves you completely?”