“Talk to your aunt. I don’t think you have a choice,” she says as she disappears down the hall and into my room.
I stop in my tracks and turn back to face my aunt.
“Do you care how I feel?” I try to expose her guilt.
“No. Not in this case. You’ve always trusted me, Samantha. You’ve always trusted that I know what’s best. You must trust me now. You are what’s best for Kai. You’re going to help turn what could be a very troubled young life around. Give this baby a chance. Please.”
I raise my eyes to meet hers again and they’re filled with worry.
“I saw him this morning.” She covers her mouth with her hand and chokes back a sob. “He’s at your hospital.”
My heart sinks.
“Dr. Hagan said he came into your NICU the day Ben died. He was supposed to be transferred to CHOP, but well, after what happened, there was a bed available at your hospital. She’s spent quite a good deal of time with him, and she knows he has a good chance at a good life, as long as he has the proper care. I told her that I was going to ask you. She agreed it would be a good idea.”
“You know I’m on administrative leave, right? I could possibly lose my nursing license. I may not be qualified for this job,” I say, and she shakes her head.
“I spoke with Jim and confirmed that you can do anything you want while you’re on administrative leave.”
“Why would you speak with my boss? Aunt Peggy, you’ve gone too far.” I’m angry now. She’s never meddled in my career before, and it makes me uncomfortable that she’s speaking with my co-workers and boss.
“When you meet Kai, you’ll understand why I’ve done what I’ve done.” She turns to leave the room. “I’m going to the pharmacy to buy everything on the list.”
And with that, she’s gone.
I hear her car back out of the garage and Cassie comes bounding down the stairs.
“Holy shit!” she exclaims.
Yeah, holy shit.
Garrett
Present
Villanova, Pennsylvania
Age 26
I PULL INTO MY LONG DRIVEWAY and watch through the rearview mirror as the privacy gate closes behind me. I’m trapped in a cage now, and I’m dreading what’s inside waiting for me.
I press the button above me and the garage opens slowly. I pass Peggy’s parked car as I maneuver my way next to the Land Cruiser. Bile rises in my throat and I slowly open the door.
What am I doing?
Three days ago, Peggy talked me into taking in a sick baby. My sick baby. I’ve regretted even giving her the power to force that decision on me. How did I let this happen?
Before I can turn and flee, the door between the garage and the house opens and Peggy emerges.
“We picked up Kai a few hours ago, and Sam is getting him settled. I wanted to talk to you before you came inside, so you know exactly what to expect.” Her worried expression tells me I shouldn’t have allowed this to transpire.
I open my mouth to tell her to get them out of my house, but she ignores my movement and speaks again.
“Kai is sick. You already know this. He has Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome.”
“I know,” I state.
“He cries. A lot. And his cries aren’t normal baby cries. They are high-pitched and will cut right through to your heart.”
I don’t know what she thinks she’s preparing me for, but I turn back to my car and unlock it.
“Garrett! Where do you think you’re going?” Her tone reminds me of my mother and I stop in my tracks. She grabs my arm, turning me around and leads me to the door of the house. She stops just before we enter.
“Sam has calmed him down, and he’s sleeping for now. I just wanted to warn you in case he wakes up. I don’t want you to be alarmed.”
“Peggy, this whole situation is fucked up.” I walk past her into the house, hoping I’m walking out of a bad dream.
The house is so quiet you can hear a pin drop. I walk through the kitchen looking for Peggy’s niece. The counters are filled with bags from the pharmacy and Babies R Us. Open boxes line the floor and baby things are everywhere. Swings and diapers and blankets. I feel like I’m going to pass out.
Peggy quickly places a cold bottle of water in my hand and says quietly, “Drink.”
“Whiskey,” I say, and my voice is hoarse. My lips feel like they’re cracking, and all I can think about is the double barrel whiskey that’s in the liquor cabinet. I place the bottle of water on the counter and keep walking into the den. The cabinet is on the far end of the room, and I need to get there now. I reach for the door and it won’t open. I tug again and it’s jammed.
“Safety locks.” Peggy’s voice startles me. She walks past me and pulls something out of her pocket and swipes it along the door. I hear a click as the cabinet lock disengages and she hands me what appears to be a magnet.
“What the hell?” I say as she pours me two fingers of whiskey.
“Drink.”
I swig it back and pass the glass back to her, indicating that I want more. She shakes her head and closes the cabinet.
“Are you relaxed yet?” she asks.
“No, and I don’t see myself getting there anytime soon.”
“Stop being so damn selfish and get yourself together,” Peggy snaps at me and I stiffen.
The past three days have been a whirlwind. After we agreed to take Kai in, I flew to Charlotte so I could explain what was going on to my parents. I didn’t want them to hear about this from the tabloids. Needless to say, my mother was shocked. Bill told me that he would help in any way that he could. They had already seen the news story about the ‘groupie’ dying from a drug overdose on our tour bus. Now they know the true story and not what the media is spreading. My return flight landed just under an hour ago, and I don’t even recognize the home I left yesterday. Peggy has completely transformed my bachelor pad into a nursery. I feel sick.
She turns me around, and we head toward the back set of stairs that leads to the guest rooms. I hear soft music coming from the room farthest down the hall. It sounds so familiar, but it’s an instrumental lullaby.
“Epic Fail Rock-a-Bye-Baby,” Peggy whispers, and I stop in my tracks.
“What?”
“I wanted Kai to hear his father’s music, but he isn’t ready for rock and roll just yet, so I got him the softer, lullaby versions of your songs.”
What the fuck?
I shake my head and look at her. “Is there anything else that you need to tell me?”
The soft pings of music I hear through the door are a complete bastardization of one of our chart-topping singles. It makes me want to vomit.
She opens the door slowly, and the first thing I see is a crib. The blinds are drawn in the room, but the ceiling is glowing with hundreds of stars and constellations. There’s a person in the rocking chair at the far end of the room, holding a baby close to her chest. I only see her silhouette, outlined by long, flowing curls.
Peggy approaches her and whispers something inaudible in her ear. She nods and stands up slowly. Peggy takes her seat and they expertly transfer the baby from her arms to Peggy’s.
She walks toward me, and her wide, blue eyes are the first thing I see. They pierce into my own and I feel a rush through my body. I don’t move as she approaches me, and she suddenly looks confused. Her lips move, but I can’t hear what she’s saying.
“What?” I ask, too loudly, and I’m immediately shushed by Peggy.
“Hallway,” she says and walks past me.
I follow her and stop outside the door. She brushes against me as she reaches to pull the door closed. Her shirt shifts and I see cleavage. My pants stir and my fight-or-flight response takes over. She’s stunning. Tall. Athletic. Fucking hot. She can’t be the baby nurse.