I shake my head and shrug my shoulders. Her analogy is comical.
“Psycho Todd Mitchell tries to feel you up in a pool. What do you do? You nut-crunch him and then become a black belt in kickboxing.”
All of this is true.
Hearing Todd’s name, however, makes me cringe. A few months after the incident in Trish O’Toole’s pool, Todd was arrested for multiple rapes and attempted murder. He’s been in prison since he was convicted of all of his crimes. The faces of the victims are still fresh in my head. Every single one of them. The media played out the story over and over again and it made my skin crawl. I wish I could have hurt him more than I did that day he attacked me in Trish’s pool. I was definitely one of the lucky ones, and I became a stronger person for it.
Cassie continues, “Your parents get killed by a deranged psycho drug addict and you vow to become a nurse to help people get better. You save people’s lives every single day, Sam. You’re amazing.”
Hearing her describe my parents’ murder sends a jolt to my heart, and I take a quick breath and hold it. What little reminders I have of them adorn my room. My bracelet dangles from a hook next to my bed. The blue ribbon is attached to the poster that I fall asleep staring at every night. My Googie sleeps next to me, reminding me of their comfort and love.
I exhale slowly and turn on my side again to look at Cassie.
“I’m done earning my badges,” I say softly. “It’s time for me to give back.”
Her eyes light up with victory.
“Exactly my point,” she says and turns off the light.
Garrett
Past
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Age 25
“I CAN’T BELIEVE HE DID IT,” I say, shaking my head and tossing back my sixth shot of Jameson.
“Dude, I can’t even.” Tristan does the same and clinks his empty shot glass against mine.
“Can’t believe who did what?” Kirsten chirps as she slides onto the barstool next to Tristan.
“Alex, man. Dude got married.” Tristan’s eyes glaze over, and his smile freezes on his face. He’s about to pass out.
Kirsten pokes him in the side, and he sits up with a jolt. “Why don’t you go upstairs?” She nudges him and holds a plastic key in front of his nose. He swipes at it until it comes into focus and stands from the bar stool. “Whoa, I shouldn’t have stood up so fast.” He wobbles a bit on his feet and backs up toward the hotel lobby. We’re in the bar after Alex and Tabby’s wedding reception. It ended two hours ago, and the newlyweds are long gone.
“Where’s Alex?” Tristan acts confused. And drunk.
“He’s upstairs sleeping with his bride, Tristan. Exactly where you should be.” Kirsten waves at him and blows him a kiss.
“Will you be up soon?” he asks, hopeful.
“Of course.”
Tristan stumbles to the elevators and practically falls in. He disappears behind the doors, and I laugh.
“What an amazing wedding,” Kirsten says as she flags down the bartender. She orders a glass of Pinot Noir and turns to face me. “Don’t you think?”
“Sure, it was amazing.” I humor her with what she wants to hear. If she starts talking about flowers and centerpieces, I’m out of here.
The bartender places a large glass of wine in front of her and says, “This is on me.” He winks at her and she ignores his advances.
“I think he likes you,” I joke and grab the last shot of whiskey that was lined up in front of me. I toss it back and take a large swig of my beer.
“Nah, he’s just hoping for a big tip.”
She sighs, raises her glass of wine and says, “Cheers.”
I take another sip of beer and nod.
“There aren’t two people in the world more deserving than Alex and Tabby.” Kirsten is Tabby’s best friend and boss. She owns a bookstore in the city and seems to be pretty successful.
“Yeah, so happy together,” I muse.
“What about you, Garrett? When do you think you’ll finally settle down?”
She can’t be serious. Settle down? Me? I nearly choke on my words. “Let me say this in a way that you’ll completely understand. Never. Ever.”
“I don’t believe you. Beneath that womanizer exterior is a soft and tender heart. I’m convinced of it.”
“Fuck that.” I finish my beer and wave my hand for another.
“What are you so afraid of?” she asks. “Have you ever been in a long-term relationship?”
I have to think about it for a second. “Nope.”
“What about the sister of that girl on tour?” she asks.
“Her? No way. We were just regular fuck buddies.”
She huffs and sips her wine. “I have faith, Garrett. You’ll stumble into love one day and you won’t even realize what’s happening to you. I predict love will find you at a time and place when you least expect it.” She waves her hand in the air as if she just cast a spell on me or something.
“Whatever.”
She looks down at her phone and swipes through some messages. “Who are you expecting to hear from at this hour? Tristan’s passed out cold right now.” I look at the clock. It’s almost two in the morning, and the lobby bar is still jammed with guests from the wedding reception. The party’s still going strong.
“I’m compulsive about checking for messages from Tabby. She looks like she’s about to give birth any second. She’s bursting at the seams.”
“I’m sure you’ll be the first to know when she does go into labor.” Gross. “Besides, she’s just upstairs, so I think the entire hotel would know if it happened.”
She raises her eyebrow when she sees the expression on my face, which I can only imagine is pure disgust.
“How many children do you want?” she asks.
“Are you kidding me? I just finished telling you I’m never settling down. Why the hell would you think I’d want kids?”
She ignores my response and continues talking. “I wanted five kids. I’ve always wanted so many that my husband and I would be outnumbered. The thought of the chaos excited me. The more kids I could have, the happier I’d be.” The smile melts from her face. “But since I can’t have kids, that dream went right out the window.”
“Bummer,” I say, surprised by her admission.
She raises the wine glass to her lips again. “I wonder if I’ll ever find someone who will love me anyway. Even if he knows I can’t give him children.”
“I don’t think Tristan will care either way,” I say. I shift in my seat, uncomfortable with this entire conversation. My skin is getting itchy, and I think it’s about time I got out of here. I didn’t sign up to be Kirsten’s personal therapist, and I certainly don’t want to know anything about her ability or inability to have kids.
“You’re so sad, Garrett. I just don’t get it. What kind of family do you have that you would have such a rotten outlook on your own future?”
“My mom and stepdad are cool. My bio dad was an asshole and killed himself.”
“Oh?” she looks surprised. “I’m sorry.”
I shake my head. There’s no need to talk about this.
“Whatever. It is what it is.” I drink some more beer and pull cash from my pocket, laying it on the bar to cover the drinks.
“Goodnight.” Kirsten sighs into her wine glass.
“Hey, I don’t mean to bum you out, but you really have the wrong read on me, okay? I’m not the settling down type of guy, and I’m certainly not someone who wants a brood of kids. I like my life just the way it is.”
She smirks at me, and I’m not sure if it’s a drunk smirk or she really thinks she knows something that I don’t know.
I shrug it off and walk through the bar. I scan the room to see if the hot blonde from the wedding is still here, hoping for a warm body to bring upstairs with me. I don’t see her anywhere, and the remaining prospects here aren’t my type. Oh well.