“No I don’t want you to tell him. Kyler can come into town, you two can have dinner, and he doesn’t even need to see me. Do you know how long he’s planning on staying?”
“He said he was thinking about buying a house here so he can be closer to his parents. I suppose he’s planning on talking to about me being his realtor, but I have no idea how long that’s going to take.” She shrugged her shoulders like it wasn’t a big deal but it was a very big deal. If Kyler came back—even if it was only on a part time basis—Finn was sure to follow. Great! Just another stressor I didn’t need.
We sat in silence as we finished our dinner. While we did the dishes together we made some small talk, before Harper brought up another subject that I wasn’t prepared to deal with. “After your appointment tomorrow, have you considered contacting West to let him know what’s going on?”
My head was down while I scrubbed sauce off a plate. “I have, I just don’t know what I plan on saying to him. Do I talk about the court proceedings first, or do I just say it? Make it quick like ripping off a band aid? It’s been playing over and over in my head and I don’t see which way is best.”
Harper nodded her head in understanding while she pondered what I said. “I wish I had the answers hon. I guess we’ll cross that bridge tomorrow.”
The next morning I couldn’t help but feel nervous. I had a feeling that actually ‘seeing’ the baby would make everything real and I didn’t know how I would react to that. I was going to see the little person growing inside me. Despite my mixed emotions about the conversation Harper and I had last night at dinner, this morning was about me and my baby.
Harper was coming to my appointment with me for support, and all her excitement was rubbing off on me. We drove to Dr. Monroe’s office and checked in. When I was called back the nurse gave me a gown and put us in an examination room. Dr. Monroe was all smiles when he came in and greeted me. I introduced him to Harper and told him that she would more than likely be attending my appointments with me from now on. He made note of it in my record. I was relieved when he informed me that my STD tests had come back negative. That was one less thing to worry about. Then we went over a ton of questions about my family history, West’s family history, questions about my monthly cycle, my diet, things I could expect during the pregnancy and what my appointments would entail.
“Okay Emilyn, I think we are finally on to the fun stuff. Why don’t you lie back and I’m going to take some measurements and then we’ll do an ultrasound to see if we can find a heartbeat and estimate your due date.”
I could hardly contain my enthusiasm. Harper scooted her chair up to the bed and reached over to hold my hand. First Dr. Monroe put a tape measure on my stomach, and then warned me that he was going to put some cold jelly on me for the ultrasound. He wasn’t lying, it was really cold. But when he put the wand on my stomach I could see a little tiny sac and something moving inside. A few clicks here, and zoom there, and suddenly I could see it… my little baby. Of course it didn’t really look like a baby, and I couldn’t feel the movement inside me that I could clearly see on the screen, but it was there. Tears started flowing down my face and my smile was huge.
Harper blew out a huge breath of air, “Holy shit!”
“Harper!”
Dr. Monroe chuckled and said, “Its fine Emilyn. Pretty amazing isn’t it? No matter how many times I get to do this, this part never gets old.” He leaned over my stomach closer to Harper. “And holy shit is right.” I was shocked to hear the words out of his mouth. “When it was my wife and I in your seats, I believe I said something pretty similar.” We all laughed.
“So these right here,” he said pointing to different spots on the screen, “are the baby’s arms and legs. It’s still quite small so they are more nubs than hands with fingers. This here, is the baby’s spine, and this little fluttering, is the baby’s heartbeat. Let’s take a listen.”
The room filled with a whooshing sound. It sounded so fast but Dr Monroe assured me that it was normal. I was totally overwhelmed and full of excitement. I looked over at my best friend and she sat speechless, with tears streaming down her face. She looked at me and we both smiled. Doctor Monroe did the calculations and estimated that was around ten weeks pregnant, meaning I was due at the end of April. I loved the idea of having a spring time baby.
When my appointment was over, Harper and I went and grabbed some lunch before heading home. We talked about the baby and how cool it was to see it on the screen. We both seemed to be wrapped up in the excitement of it all when I got a text from West.
W: We need to talk
E: K, I can call now if it is a good time.
W: Calling you now.
Harper said she’d give me some privacy but I asked her to stay. When my cell phone rang my heart was racing. I had to tell West about the pregnancy and I had absolutely no idea how he was going to react. Maybe he would be overjoyed and realize this was something he really did want in his life. Not that I would’ve taken him back, but I didn’t know very many people that didn’t like children; especially their own. We didn’t have to be married to co-parent and raise a child successfully. This could totally work out!
“Hello?”
“Hello Emilyn.”
“Hi West, how are you doing?” My little pep talk had calmed me down.
“I’m fine, but the reason I’m calling is because I received a bill in the mail from a Dr. Monroe’s office. My lawyer said that you got a job, so I’d like to know why you aren’t using their insurance now instead of mine? I looked over the paperwork Emilyn, it says that any medical coverage now falls on you. So where would you like me to mail this bill?”
Okay, obviously I was wrong. This was not what I had expected when he said we needed to talk. Well, I’d actually had no idea what he’d want to talk about, but a bill wasn’t it. “Your lawyer was correct, I do have a job. But it isn’t enough to cover my medical expenses.” Harper tapped me on the shoulder and whispered that she wanted to hear the conversation too, so I hit speakerphone.
“I’m not going to support you forever Emilyn. Put yourself on their insurance.” He was getting worked up and I didn’t want him angry when I told him the news.
“I already have West, but the coverage isn’t enough to pay for my appointments. I just need a few months to stay under your plan and then you can remove me.” I was pleading with him but I had no other choice. My insurance wouldn’t cover very much of the pregnancy and I didn’t want to start off my life with a baby and a ton of debt.
“What on earth is going on with you that you need to stay on my plan?”
I paused and looked up at Harper. It was now or never. “West… I’m… I’m…”
“For fuck sakes Em spit it out!”
“She’s trying to you little prick, but you interrupted her!” Harper shouted at him.
“Oh just fucking great, you have the Harpy on the phone?” West was really pissed now, and I could see this just wasn’t going to play out the way that I’d hoped it would.
“Yes, I’m sorry West, she’s just trying to be supportive.”
“So then what’s going on? Are you sick or something?”
“I’m pregnant Weston.”
I heard not a single, solitary sound from the other end. I took a hold of Harpers hand, willing myself not to cry. I’d finally told him and he wasn’t saying anything. I was about to check and make sure that he was still on the line when he started laughing. Seriously? How was anything about this funny? I’d just told the man that he was going to be a father. Maybe I’d officially caused him to go off the deep end.