The President said, "Judges, chapter seven."
The Admiral looked puzzled. The Marine Commandant suddenly said, "Gideon's Band!"
"Exactly. I suspect that we have been trying to meet
quotas - numbers of men - rather than placing quality first. I'm sure it's not as simple as that, but that does seem to be part of it. General, does the Air Force have any different slant on this?"
"No, Ma'am, I think the Navy and the Corps both speak for me. And the Army. . - although Smitty's problems are different from ours. Our worst problem is hanging on to trained men.. - because what we teach them, flying and electronics especially, are very salable on the outside. I want to add something, though. Marijuana is not on the list of drugs. It may very well be true that grass is no worse than liquor. But neither one mixes with driving a flying machine. Or anything in an airplane. But grass is harder to cope with. A stash is easier to hide than a bottle, and it is harder to tell when a man is stoned than when he is drunk. And much harder to prove. I welcome suggestions."
"I think we all do. Although I think we've pinpointed one essential. Quality before quantity. Gentlemen, we'll let this marinate about ten days while all of us try to spot all of the basic things that are wrong
then meet again and exchange ideas. In writing. Call the shots as you see them, don't be afraid of hurting feelings, pay no attention to sacred cows. Admiral, you found things wrong with the military legal system; please analyze the matter, with specific recommendations. If you truly feel that we need to go back to keelhauling and hanging at the yardarm, say so."
"I do not, Ma'am. But I do think the present rules are more suited to a Scout camp than to a fighting force. Punishment should be swift and certain; mutineers should not be coddled. We need a new code."
"Work on it. I assume that you have legal aides. Mr. Secretary of Defense, I have not intended to monopolize the floor. Before we adjourn, I want you to give us your opinions on problems of discipline. I would like to hear comment on those figures I supplied, all categories. But you aren't limited to that. Feel free to bring
up anything. I think that discipline in the Armed Forces is as serious a problem as I face . . - and the most difficult."
"Discipline is not one of the duties of the Secretary of Defense."
"So? What are your duties?"
"To manage my department. Discipline belongs to these gentlemen. Not to me. And certainly not to you. You are way out of line."
"You forgot something, sir. The President is in the direct line of command, at the top, and cannot avoid responsibility for any aspect of her command. The Secretary of Defense is not in the line of command; he is an executive secretary for the President. However, since you see your job as merely managerial, and not concerned with morale and discipline, I won't press you about it. I have your signed resignation in my desk, inherited from my predecessor. I'm accepting it. At once."
The ex - Secretary leaned back and laughed. "How just like a woman! Ruffle her feathers and she flies off the handle. But it's okay, Shortie; I didn't intend to stay this long. After the Chief died I was ready to quit. But Charlie asked me to stick around a little longer, keep an eye on you. I know what you did to him the day of the tragedy, standing in his way when he was entitled to the job. You never were anything but an election poster. Didn't anybody ever tell you that?"
"You may leave now. You're excused."
"Oh, I'm leaving; I've got a press conference in ten minutes. Just one thing: You said Joe probably disliked taking orders from you because you've had no military experience. Nonsense. Any top brass expects to take orders from a civilian. But no real man will take orders from a nigger, much less a nigger wench."
The Marine was out of his chair so fast that it overturned, snatched the ex - Secretary out of his chair and got a hammerlock on him - but beat the others to it only by being closest.
"Down on your knees and apologize, you jerk! That's the President of the United States you're talking to!" The Marine General's Deep South accent, ordinarily carefully corrected, came out in full force, thick as gumbo.
"Make him take his hands off me!"
"Keep him secure, General. And thank you, sir. But don't rough him up more than necessary. Admiral, if you will be so kind as to check, I think you will find two Marines and two Secret Service men just outside that door. Please ask one of them to telephone for two White House Police. I want this person removed from the building and not allowed back in. Nor back into the Pentagon, ever. Most especially not into his former office."
"A pleasure, Ma'am!"
"Thank you, sir. I hope to see you all here at the same time a week from Thursday. General Smith, I ask you to remain chairman pro tern, in addition to your regular duties. Adjourn when it suits you. I'm withdrawing now; I want to lie down. I find that I am a bit shaky...."
CND 4,O6CRH
CHEYENNE - LEGISLATURE BOTH HOUSES PASSED OVERWHELMINGLY FIRST AND SECOND READING EMERGENCY MEASURE RESTORING PAUPERS OATH FOR RECIPIENTS OF ANY PUBLIC
ASSISTANCE OF ANY SORT REPEAT ANY SORT IN RESPONSE TO
GOVERNOR'S IMPASSIONED CLAIM THAT THERE WOULD BE NO
MONEY FOR THE BLIND AND THE TOTALLY HELPLESS UNLESS
STATE RETURNED TO NINETEENTH CENTURY TEST OF ELIGIBILITY MORE
CHEYENNE - AMERICAN CIVIL LIBERTIES UNION WILL FILE
CLASS ACTION IN FEDERAL COURT TO STOP RESTORATION OF
PAUPERS OATH AS PREREQUISITE FOR PUBLIC ASSISTANCE.
"Come in, Senator! Thank you for doing me this favor!'
"Madam President, it would be a pleasure to call on you at any time even if you were not President. Perhaps more."
"Uncle Sam, I don't know what that means but I like it. Now to work! Would it suit you to work for me?"
"You know it would, my dear - but I have a constituency."
"I don't mean resign and take a job here. But can't you pair votes, or something? I need a lot of help from you right now and more later."
"Anything the President wants, the President gets. Yes, I can always arrange a pair. . - even when I'm only nominally out of the District." He looked down at her. "Trouble?"
"Work I don't know how to handle. I've got to appoint twenty - three judges and I can't put it off much longer. And I don't know how to tell a knucklehead from an Oliver Wendell Holmes. See that tall stack? And that one? Those are the written opinions - or other legal writings if they are not already judges - from the candidates for judgeships. No names on them, and other identifications blacked out. Just identification numbers. I thought I could read this mess and tell which ones had their heads screwed on tight. I can't. I don't understand legalese, I'm not a lawyer."
"I'm not a lawyer either, bright eyes.'
"No, but you're the world's leading semanticist. I figured that, if you couldn't understand something, then it was really nonsense."
"It's a good approach. If a person of normal intelligence, and a reasonably full education, cannot understand a piece of prose, then it is gibberish. But you shouldn't be doing it; you have a country to worry about. I don't have time, either, but I'll take time; my staff are quite competent to wipe the noses and hold the hands of my constituents for a while. I'll arrange it."