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"Explorer!" Vincence snapped. "This council will decide what it can and can't ignore."

"No, Admiral," I replied, "the League of Peoples will."

Seele stepped up beside me and placed a document on the table. "Admirals," she announced, "I am officially presenting you with the Explorer's report of all that she witnessed on Melaquin. In light of the report's contents, I recommend that the council immediately terminate all missions to Melaquin, for the safety of the sentient race living on that planet. The council cannot keep sending potential murderers into a peaceful and defenseless society. I might point out, the case of Laminir Jelca demonstrates that previous good behavior is no guarantee a person will remain sentient under such conditions. If you continue to banish Explorers to Melaquin, the League will surely conclude you do not care if one of those Explorers becomes infuriated to the point of murder."

"But we didn't realize this was happening!" the admiral on my right protested.

"You do now," I said. "And if you don't do anything to correct it, the League will know."

Silence fell around the table. At last, Vincence collected himself. "Our thanks for your report, Explorer. May I ask you and Admiral Seele to withdraw into the anteroom? The council must discuss these matters."

Seele and I snapped perfect salutes and did an about-face. In perfect silence, we left the chamber.

Slow to Catch On

Ten minutes later, Vincence came out to see us. As he entered, I heard raised voices inside the chamber; but Vincence closed the door too quickly for me to tell what they were saying.

"A few are slow to catch on," Vincence told us with an apologetic shrug. "They think if you two disappear, we can continue with business as usual. They don't understand the League… not as well as you obviously do. Now that we know there's a risk, we have to take action. Anything else would be gross indifference to threats against sentient life. The High Council would be branded non-sentient, and the whole Fleet grounded until we were removed."

"So what are you going to do?" I asked.

"Under other circumstances, we might force a few councillors to resign and blame it all on them; but we won't fool the League with token gestures. Whatever we do has to be real. I should think we'll appoint a commission to review all Exploration practices and make sure we aren't subjecting other sentient races to unnecessary risk."

"There have been similar commissions before," I said.

"True." Vincence gave me a thin smile. "But we'll have to follow the recommendations of this one: the League will be watching. They're always watching." He turned to Seele. "We'll need your input, Admiral, when we decide who's appointed to the inquiry. No toadies — people who will honestly ask the necessary questions."

"I'll tell you one name right away," Seele replied. "Festina Ramos."

I tensed but Vincence only nodded. "Ramos is at the top of the list," he agreed. "It will show our contrition. We'll also include some other Explorers from Melaquin — we can't sweep them under the table. Full disclosure, full acknowledgement of blame… at least behind closed doors. If we do everything else right, we won't have to wash our dirty linen in public." He chuckled without humor. "Thank God the League has plenty of caste species where the leaders never explain decisions to underlings."

"Sir," I said, "if you think I'll keep quiet—"

He held up his hand to stop me. "Here's the offer, Ramos. I've skimmed your report enough to see details which are… politically delicate. Do you really want the public to know that an Explorer tried to rip away the atmosphere of an inhabited planet? The outcry would hurt the Explorer Corps as much as the High Council. And there's no point in revealing it now. You've won — period. The Council must stop sending Explorers to Melaquin. We have to review every aspect of Exploration missions. We have to admit our mistakes and do everything we can to rectify them. We also have to make reparations — to the other banished Explorers and to you. In the spirit of which… do you want to become an admiral?"

"Not especially," I said.

"That doesn't surprise me," Vincence shrugged. "But I think you'll do it anyway. Chee's position is vacant… and before you break into cursing, yes, he was victim of a great injustice too. We'll schedule an inquiry to decide whose head should roll. In the meantime, however, Admiral Chee needs a successor. Since most of his spies are retired Explorers, we think they'll be more cooperative if their new leader comes from the Corps."

"I don't want to be an admiral," I told him. "The thought turns my stomach."

"Festina," Seele said quietly, "the job is important. I know what you must be feeling — I felt the same forty years ago. But someone has to do Chee's job. Someone has to take the responsibility."

"I'm an Explorer First Class," I objected. "A dozen ranks away from admiral."

"Chee's people will teach you the job," Vincence said. "He has a top notch staff. You'll have their respect and the respect of government leaders too. You're smart, you're committed, and best of all, you're an Explorer who doesn't look like an Explorer anymore. Perfect admiral material."

I caught my breath. I forced myself to remain calm. "All right," I said, "I'll take over Chee's work."

"Good," Vincence smiled.

"And for the good of the Corps, I won't tell the public what Jelca did on Melaquin."

"Also good," Vincence nodded.

"And you can make me an admiral," I said.

"Done," Vincence replied.

"But…" I reached up to my cheek, dug in my fingernails, and pulled down hard. The artificial skin came off like an adhesive bandage, ripping away from my cheek with a good fierce sting. "I'm afraid," I said, "I'm going to be an admiral who looks like an Explorer."

My Second Graduation

And so…

This afternoon, the Explorer Academy held its annual graduation ceremony. As always, a number of admirals sat on the podium. As always, one of those admirals gave the commencement address.

This year, that admiral was me.

Me with my purple birthmark. My disfigurement. My pride.

The lecturer who introduced me claimed I was the Explorer who made good. The Explorer who had earned respect. The Explorer who sat on the review commission and made a difference.

Let's hope that's true.

I stood in front of the graduating class, ready to tell them their world was changing. "Greetings," I said, "I am a sentient citizen of the League of Peoples and I beg your Hospitality. My name is Festina Ramos and I take great pride…"

The rest of my words were drowned out by applause.

JAMES ALAN GARDNER lives in Waterloo, Ontario, Canada, with his wife, Linda Carson, and two cantankerous rabbits. He has published numerous pieces of short fiction in such places as Amazing, The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, Asimov's Science Fiction Magazine, OnSpec, and the Tesseracts anthologies. In 1989, he was the Grand Prize winner in the Writers of the Future contest. He has also won an Aurora award for Best Short SF Story in English (1990).

In his spare time, he plays piano, practices kung fu, and recovers from bruises. Half the time he writes computer documentation and the other half he writes SF. Guess which half he likes better.

Copyright © 1997 by James Alan Gardner