No matter how hard he tried, Ryan just could see nothing male in her at all. He smiled, as there was even less now.
He sat on the chair, and settled down to wait, for as long as it took. He wasn’t worried any more and he just wanted to be the first person she saw when she came round.
Chapter 9.
Michelle’s first conscious thought was that she had never ever felt so much pain.
“Scheiße,” she mumbled.
Ryan was dozing and he was instantly awake. He was at her side in an instant. It was dark outside, he glanced at the clock; it was nine pm.
She swam through the waves of confusion and morphine induced cloud of fuzzy edges. Her abdomen was one enormous ache and she felt bound up tight. It was just all so uncomfortable. There were drips and monitor cables everywhere and she felt queasy as well.
She opened her eyes, seeing a familiar face. The same face she remembered after she was shot – Ryan’s face.
“Hi,” he said, feeling a complete fool.
“Scheiße, I hurt.”
He grinned.
“Yeah, bullets do that. Scheiße, that’s German for shit, right?”
She smiled weakly, for even now she was trying to think in German, and not in her native Dutch.
“Ja, I hurt, Ryan, I hurt bad.”
“I know, but you are gonna be okay. They got the bullet out on the ship so you're gonna be fine now.”
Michelle frowned. Using her brain was difficult, as everything was just so fuzzy and it was difficult to concentrate.
“You carried me?” she said.
“You remembered that?”
“Ja, you ran all the way to the boat?”
“You needed help.”
She smiled, but her eyes rolled and she was asleep again. Ryan looked down and saw she had a tight hold of his hand.
He dragged the chair closer and sat there holding her hand. She kept flitting in and out of consciousness. However, through it all, she kept a tight grip of his hand.
An hour later, as the anaesthetic was clearly wearing off, she came round again. The pain was still there, but clearly the painkillers were taking the edge off it somewhat, as it was now a dull ache.
She saw that Ryan was still in the chair beside the bed, still holding her right hand. His head was slumped forward and was resting on his elbows. He was snoring slightly and he looked so peaceful.
She felt underneath the sheet and found an extensive length of bandage binding her lower abdomen and groin. She frowned as she recalled being shot, but wondered why there was so much bandage down to cover her groin.
She was uncomfortable and moved, groaning involuntarily.
Ryan was instantly awake.
“Hi again,” he said.
She smiled. “Still here?”
“No, I’m a mirage,” he said, grinning sheepishly.
Michelle was confused. She was so pleased he was there. It was almost as if he were someone special - her lover maybe, so it felt so right him being there. They had only seen each other about five times and only for a matter or a few moments each time. She adored his smile, as it warmed her heart again.
“How did everything go?” she asked.
“Well, the doctor says you will be fine.”
“No. I mean the island. How did your operation go?”
“Oh, it was successful. We recovered about six times more cocaine than we expected and the cash. He had so much stashed away, it was unbelievable.”
“Was it Maria who shot me?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry, she was your friend.”
“Is she dead?”
Ryan nodded and looked a little sombre.
“You?” she asked, and he nodded again.
She squeezed his hand.
“You had to. If you hadn’t some others may have died,” she said.
He was staring at her hand, aware that his heart was telling him that he loved her.
“And Luis?”
“He decided to try to shoot his way out. He is dead.”
“I thought as much. He would never become a prisoner. In a way I am glad, but I suppose any death is difficult to come to terms with. He wasn’t a nice man, but he was good to me, mostly,” she said, feeling guilty at the pleasure the sex had given her..
“You did one heck of a good job. Not one agent was hurt.”
“I am pleased. Enough men have died to try to stop Luis. But, now he has gone, someone else will fill his shoes,” Michelle moved and grimaced with pain.
“My God. Who’d have thought that one little bullet could have hurt so much,” she said.
Ryan realised that no one had told her yet.
“Michelle, it wasn’t just one bullet.”
“What? You mean I was shot twice?”
“No. I mean, in a way. Maria fired a couple of shots, but only one hit you. The doctors, they took the bullet out on the ship, but they patched you up here. They also conducted SRS on you. You are now more a woman than ever before.”
She stared at him, as his words sank in.
Ryan smiled as her grip on his hand increased. He looked into her blue eyes and saw she was crying.
“They did the SRS?” she asked, not able to take it in.
“Yup. I told them, ‘if you don’t, then I couldn’t marry her.’ ”
She stared at him.
“What did you say?”
“Michelle, it was a joke, but I don’t know how or why, but could you believe that I love you?” Ryan heard his voice say.
The tears rolled down her cheek and her grip on his hand threatened to cut off all circulation to his fingers.
“Look, I’m way outa line, so forget what this fool said and just get better, okay?” Ryan said.
She lay there, making no attempt to stop or mop up her tears.
“How can you, you know about me?” she asked.
He grinned and shrugged.
“Call me mad, or a fool, but I do, and I think I have since I first saw you. But let’s just get you better before we start getting stupid.”
“Hold me,” she said. Ryan stood and gently wrapped his arms around her shoulders, taking care not to get tangled amongst the various drips and monitor cables.
They held each other for several moments and he could smell her hair. She could feel his warmth and strength, and for the first time in her life she felt free. A strange feeling of happiness welled up from deep within her, and rose, exploding from her in the form of a laugh mingled with tears of joy.
She held onto him tightly, as if afraid she would lose him. She wanted this man to love her for who she was now and realised that her feelings for him were very strong. She felt his tight powerful muscles through the thin shirt, and he smelled of male sweat and strength. She was already feeling dizzy because of the drugs. Now she felt a new emotion and one she had not experienced before.
“Oh, Ryan, how can you love me?”
“I don’t know. I just know that I do and would hope that you could love me too.”
She released him slightly, so she could look into his eyes.
“I do. You were the first person to treat me as I wanted to be treated and I think I fell for you that first day too.”
His smile warmed her heart and almost made all her pain and discomfort disappear. Almost.
He eased her back against the pillows and she looked pale and tired. But her smile said more than a million words.
“I think I want to sleep again,” she said, closing her eyes. She drifted off to sleep with a blissful smile on her face.
A doctor came in. He was wearing a casual shirt and slacks, obviously on his way home.
“Agent Hobbs?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m Harry Markham. I am a colleague of Doctor Harrison. I conducted the SRS procedure on her.”
The men shook hands.
“How did it go?”
“Well considering we were doing two things at once, very well. Once she recovers then I will go through the recovery exercises with her. Are you her colleague or her friend?”