“Why the fuck are you going to his house tonight? Do you still want to be one of his whores? I can make you a whore just as easily.”
“We have a project for English, Chris. I swear I didn’t pick him. We were the last two left after everyone had paired off.” I sit on the floor, waiting for him to hit me with it again, but nothing comes. I turn around to see what is going on. He is standing there in front of me with his pants and boxers down, just looking at me. I stiffen as I realize things are about to get a whole lot worse.
“If you are going to act like a little whore for anyone, it will be for me! Do you understand me?” I nod my head. What does he want from me?
“I’m the one that puts up with you. Do you really think someone like him is going to want to deal with all your shit, especially when you don’t put out? We aren’t going to have sex right now so stop looking at me like that, but don’t think I’m going to wait much longer. Now, you’re going to suck my dick until I come in that virgin mouth of yours. Then when you’re with him tonight, you’ll remember who you belong to. Got it?”
I nodded my head. This can’t be happening. I am not ready for this. My first time shouldn’t be something unwanted, something forced. The minute he puts it in my mouth, I start to cry. He warns me to stop or he will make it so I can’t show my face tonight. I try to think of happy things to make this less painful, but I honestly don’t have too many good memories to use. After what seems like an eternity, Chris finishes in my mouth. I run to the bathroom down the hall hoping no one notices my appearance, and throw up until I have nothing left in me.
When I go back, my roommate Nicole is there. She takes one look at me and I swear, somehow, she knows. Chris doesn’t like me hanging out with her because he says she is too nosy for her own good. I change and get ready to go to Carter’s house, although I don’t know how I am going to face him now.
Chapter Six
Carter
Knock knock
Maddy must be here. I walk to the door and my heart starts beating faster. When I open it, the look on her face stops me in my tracks. What the heck happened to her? She looks presentable on the outside, but I can see the pain in her eyes. What is she hiding?
“Hey, come in.” She walks into my house, and it feels so good to have her here. “I made dinner because I figured you’d be hungry. I hope ravioli is okay. It is the one thing I’m half-decent at making.”
She smiled at me. “That was really nice of you, Carter, thank you.”
I make us plates and we sit down at the table. I try to make small talk, but all I am getting are one-word answers.
She looks up at me. “So, what topic do you think we should do the project on?” That is so not what I want to talk about right now, but at least she is talking to me. “I’m thinking we could do a study on tuition rates and whether students feel that what they’re paying is fair. We can ask them about all of the different fees. Maybe even see if they’re aware of all of them. I also think we should try to find out if they feel they’re getting what they pay for.”
“I really like that idea. If you want, I can type up a sample survey and email it to you. You can change anything you need to. Then we can pick a day next week and survey random students.”
“Okay, that sounds good.” She takes her plate to the kitchen, washes it off and sticks it in the dishwasher. I see her going for her coat. She can’t leave yet, she just got here.
“Maddy, please don’t go yet.”
“Why, Carter? We both know I shouldn’t be here. You know you didn’t need to taunt Chris like that earlier, either.”
Just hearing her say that asshole’s name pisses me off. I know Chris because he used to come up here to party with some of his friends last year. He had a habit of running his mouth. In fact, he and Jason almost got into a fight. I just don’t get what she sees in him. I’ve seen him with other girls when he visited campus and he was an asshole to them. I’m not a saint and admit to having my share of girls¸ but I always treat them with respect.
“Listen, I know I acted like an asshole and I’m sorry. It just drives me crazy that you’re with him, Maddy. I can see that you’re not happy. Where is that girl I met the first day who had that great smile? You never smile when you’re with him and that’s a damn shame because you have a beautiful smile.”
I see the blush creeping up her face and, before I know what I am doing, I go over to her and kiss her. Her lips are just as soft as I imagined they’d be. She gasps and I take advantage, slipping my tongue into her mouth. I can tell she isn’t experienced, but it doesn’t matter. This is the best kiss I’ve ever had. She pulls away suddenly, grabs her jacket, and runs for the door. I catch up with her, grabbing her arm in an attempt to convince her to stay. “Maddy, please stay.”
“Carter, I can’t do this. I’m with someone else!” Her voice escalates.
“I know you are and I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” Yes, I do. I’m falling for her. Fuck, where did that come from? How can I be falling for someone who doesn’t even want me? “Listen, I know he was probably mad about you coming here tonight. But you’re already here, so as long as I promise not to kiss you again, will you hang out?”
“Carter, I don’t know. If I do, you have to promise me that won’t happen again.” Her words and her face tell a different story. I can see that she didn’t hate the kiss as much as she wants me to think.
“I do. Now come sit down.” I just want her here, even if I have to pretend like I don’t want her.
She seems so uncomfortable now and I am pissed at myself for making it that way. “Your house is really nice. You mentioned earlier you had off work. What do you do?”
“I’m a bouncer at Rebellion.” By the blank expression on her face, I guess that she’d never heard of it. “It’s a club downtown. I’m guessing you’ve never been there?”
“No, I don’t really go out much.”
If she were my girl, I’d take her out all the time. It makes me sick that she is with that asshole. We watch TV for about an hour. Some comedy is on and she is laughing at it. I miss hearing that sound. I miss just being around her.
She turned to face me. “So, tell me about your family?”
“Well, I told you my mom passed away. After that, it was just me, my dad, my brother, and sister. Holly is seventeen and Anthony is fifteen. What about your family?”
Her face drops like she didn’t expect me to return the question. She seems to be looking anywhere but at me. “Listen, Carter, I had fun, but I really need to go. I have to study.”
What did I say? Why is she all of a sudden telling me she needs to study? I wonder why asking about her family upset her so much. I want to ask her, but I don’t think she is ready to tell me anything. “Okay, let me give you a ride home.”
“No, it’s okay. I will-”
“Come on, I’m taking you home.” She reluctantly goes outside and gets into my car. The car ride is short and in no time I am pulling up to her dorm. I get out of the car and walk over to her side.
“You don’t need to walk me in. I’ll be fine.,” she says, as she closes the door and looks up at me.
I run my hands up her arms, stopping at her shoulders, before trailing them back down. “It’s okay, I want to.”
She nods her head. When we get to her door, she is about to unlock it when her roommate opens it. I recognize her. She is in one of my afternoon classes.
I give Maddy a hug. It feels so good to have her pressed against me that I don’t want to let go. She pulls away first, but the look in her eyes lets me know I’m not the only one feeling it.