“Of course she does,” he snapped, then immediately regretted it. He sat upright. “Sorry. It’s just… just… I don’t understand why you had to tell her. It doesn’t seem right me going to your place, even if Blake isn’t there.”
“Why? You spent most of your time there before.”
“Exactly. Before.” He didn’t get it. Was Ruby being deliberately obtuse about the whole thing, or did she really think it was a good idea? He’d shared a lot of great times with Blake at his house. Tree climbing. Biking. The first can of beer they’d tasted. It had been like his second home. His sanctuary from the awful life he had with his parents. He’d have given anything to live there all the time. But now… “How can I go to your place after what happened?” He thumped the steering wheel in frustration.
“You have to trust that Mom wants to see you. She’s made your favorite cake.”
“Chocolate?” Everything was getting weirder by the second.
“Isn’t that proof that she really wants you to come back with me?”
He let out a long sigh. It sounded like her mom was being genuine. She’d always baked his favorite cake on special occasions that his own parents overlooked. “I don’t know.” He heard the hesitation in his voice. Much different from his adamant no from a few moments ago.
“Come on; it will be fine. And if you find it too hard, we don’t have to stay. Deal?” Ruby held out her hand for him to shake, anticipation evident on her face.
He couldn’t resist the sparkle in her eyes. “Okay. But not for long.”
He wondered what the hell he’d gotten himself into. It seemed so wrong. And Blake might be out, but what would happen if he came back home and found Drew there? It would be a nightmare for everyone.
“It will be fine. Trust me,” Ruby said, taking one of his hands in hers and gently stroking it.
“Yeah. Trust you. Like the time when we…”
“I know what you’re going to say,” she interrupted. “About the time I almost got us arrested for fare evasion on the subway. But this is totally different.” She grinned at him.
Drew’s muscles relaxed a little. He wasn’t happy about going to Ruby’s house, but he’d do it. For her.
He started the engine and drove in the direction of her house. Ruby talked non-stop about nothing in particular, and it suited him because it gave him the chance to brace himself for what he knew was going to be a very strange and difficult time.
In what seemed like only seconds, he pulled up outside Ruby’s little white row house. It struck him how different their lives were. Not just because of his parents drinking, but the whole way they lived. He couldn’t care less about living in such a huge place. About the fact that you could practically fit Ruby’s entire house in the square footage of his kitchen. Even with the problems with her dad, Ruby’s home had laughter and warmth that no amount of money could buy. He’d trade his house in a heartbeat to live like she did.
“Let’s get this over with,” he said as he opened his door.
He leaned against the back of his car and tried to relax his super-tense muscles. The temperature had dropped, and there was a distinct chill in the air, which caused him to shiver. At least he told himself that the weather had caused this reaction in him, and it was nothing to do with the situation.
“Come on,” Ruby said, taking hold of his hand and tugging him toward the footpath leading to their front door.
Before they’d even made it to the door, it opened, and Ruby’s mom stood there with a welcoming smile on her lips. Although it didn’t quite make her eyes; the expression in them was hesitant.
Drew’s feet seemed to be stuck to the ground, and fleetingly, he debated turning and running in the opposite direction. Ruby squeezed his hand, pulling him forward the extra few yards.
“Hello, Drew,” Mrs. Davis said. As he got close up, he could see her staring at his neck and then tears formed in her eyes, which she blinked away.
His breath hitched in the back of his throat. He couldn’t believe that she’d felt moved to tears by seeing what had happened to him. No one had done that before. Apart from his mom in one of her drunken moments when it first happened, and he didn’t count that because he wasn’t 100 percent convinced the tears were for him anyway.
“Hi, Mrs. Davis.” His voice sounded forced and awkward, but he didn’t know how to change it.
In the past, she’d always given him a hug. He didn’t expect that now, and that suited him fine. He didn’t do hugs now, apart from Ruby, who knew how to give them without causing him too much pain.
“Come in.”
They followed Ruby’s mom through to the lounge, and Drew sat on the dark wooden upright chair in the corner. Ruby and her mom sat on the brown leather couch. He glanced around the room. On nearly every surface there were photos of Blake. Blake playing football. Blake receiving a medal. Blake in the school play. It seemed like Blake overload, and it took Drew all his strength to not jam his hands over his eyes before his head exploded.
“Drew?” Ruby’s voice distracted him from his thoughts.
“Yes?” Ruby and her mom both stared at him with similar expectant expressions on their faces. He couldn’t believe that he hadn’t noticed before how alike the two of them were.
“Mom asked you about being in hospital.”
“Sorry, I was miles away. I don’t want to talk about being in hospital.” He waved his hand dismissively.
All he remembered about his time in hospital was going between losing all sense of what was happening when they administered his morphine, to the excruciating pain as the drug gradually wore off. He’d been more lucid in those latter moments, and it was then that he remembered what he’d done to Reese. At those times he begged the nurses to let him suffer because he deserved it. Of course, they didn’t listen to him. And so the cycle went for many days. He couldn’t remember how many.
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and stared at the carpet, in particular on a dark stain that looked like ink.
“That’s okay,” Ruby’s mom said. “How about I get some cake and a drink? Homemade lemonade?”
“That’s great,” Ruby said.
“Yes, thanks,” Drew said. Mrs. Davis stood up and headed out of the lounge.
After a few moments of silence, Ruby jumped up from the couch and stood in front of him with her hands placed on her hips. “I know it’s hard, but there’s no need to be rude.”
He sensed her attempting to remain calm, even though he could see by the way her eyes flashed that she was really mad at him.
“What do you mean?” he replied, feigning ignorance. He didn’t know why he pretended because his actions spoke for themselves.
“You are making it very hard for Mom. It’s not easy for her either, you know. She’s making a huge effort, and all you are doing is throwing it back in her face.”
Yes, he knew that. He knew he was acting like a child, but at that precise moment, he was unable to do anything about it. “So why did she invite me? I knew it was a stupid idea agreeing to come here. It’s served no purpose at all other than winding all of us up. I’m sorry, Ruby. I know you wanted us all to be back to how we were, but that’s a ridiculous wish. It’s never gonna happen. Say good-bye to your mom for me. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Without waiting for a response from Ruby, Drew left the house without a backward glance.
Chapter Thirteen
“He’s gone,” Ruby said, running into the kitchen in time to see her mom taking plates and glasses out of the cupboard, the cake and lemonade sitting on the counter.
She hadn’t known whether to chase after Drew or to let him go. As it happened, he had been so fast, she wouldn’t have made it to the car before he’d gone, anyway. She’d made it to the front door just in time to watch him take off down the road at what looked like ninety miles an hour. She felt so angry at his behavior. Just like with her father, everything was always about him.