"There is no doubt about it," said he to himself, "life is what you choose to make it." He looked about him in search of a little raw material. "Those two girls over there," thought he, "are probably good-natured to a fault. I wonder if they wear little articles like those in this picture."
His imagination conjured up a scene which he found incredibly diverting. He was compelled to snigger through his nose. He experienced an ardent desire to slap somebody. "What in the world have I been doing," thought he, "all these twenty years? Nothing!"
He looked up again, with the intention of darting a certain sort of glance at the two young ladies who had appealed to his fancy. He was mortified to see that they were gone.
He looked around the caf, in the hope that they had only changed their table, and saw, to his overwhelming surprise, sitting only a few feet away from him, with a monster Pernod before her, none other than Madame Dupres herself, apparently in the best of health, and wearing her grey hat.
She was at once aware of his regard, compressed her lips, and stifled a giggle, which exploded like a soda-water within. She then fixed him with an eye as quizzical as a parrot's eye. Monsieur Dupres, taking up his glass, made haste to join his spouse. "My dear," said he, "I came out to recover my calm."
Madame made no answer, only downed the second half of her Pernod at a single swig, and, replacing the glass on the table, fixed her eye unwaveringly upon it till her husband signalled the waiter. "Another Pernod," said he. "In fact, bring two."
The power of conscience is so great, in a small way, that Monsieur Dupres, on being discovered in the caf, could not help feeling that his wife knew his most secret intentions, even those concerning the two young ladies. He anticipated a volley of reproaches. You may imagine his relief when he saw that Madame was cocking her eye at him in the most tolerant and understanding fashion over the rim of her glass, the contents of which were drawn up as if by magic into the refined pouting of her lips. "Marie," said he with a smile, "perhaps we have lived too narrowly, as it were. After all, this is the twentieth century. What a magnificent figure of a woman you really are!"
Madame Dupres smiled indulgently. At that moment the door swung violently open, and a man entered, who looked about him on all sides. Monsieur Dupres looked at this man. "Impossible!" said he. "As I was saying, Marie, I have a delicious idea. Prepare yourself to be shocked."
Madame Dupres, however, had noticed the newcomer. She smiled delightedly, and waved her hand. Smiling also, but not evincing any surprise, the newcomer hastened over.
"Robert!" cried Madame Dupres.
"God in heaven!" cried Monsieur. "It is Robert."
No words can express the felicity of these three old friends, bound together by memories which were only mellowed by the passage of twenty years. Besides, they were already half tight, for it was apparent that Robert also had been indulging in an apritif or two. "Fancy seeing you!" said he to Monsieur Dupres. "What a small world it is! There is really no room to do anything."
Monsieur Dupres was equally incoherent. He could do nothing but slap Robert on the back. They had a last round, and moved into the restaurant on the other side of the partition.
"What have you been doing all these years?" asked Robert as they seated themselves.
"Nothing very much," said Madame Dupres.
"Oho!" cried Robert, smiling all over his face. "Is that so? What a magnificent evening we shall have! Tonight we drink the wine we could never afford in the old days. You know the wine I mean, Marie?"
"You mean the Hermitage," said Monsieur Dupres, who already had his nose in the list. "Eighty francs! Why not? To the devil with eighty francs! A wine like that puts all sorts of ideas into one's head. Champagne first. Why not? Like a wedding. Only better."
"Bravo!" cried Robert. "You have neatly expressed it."
"What shall we eat?" said Monsieur Dupres. "Study the menu, my children, instead of looking at one another as if you were raised from the dead. We must have something spicy. Marie, if you eat garlic, I must eat garlic. He! He! He!"
"No garlic," said Robert.
"No garlic," said Madame Dupres.
"What?" said her husband. "You know you adore it."
"One's tastes change," said Madame.
"You are right," said her husband. "That was what I was saying when Robert came in. I wish the fal-lal shops were open. Marie, I would like to buy you a little present. Something I saw in a magazine. Heavens, what wickedness there is in the world! The air seems full of it. Marie, we have wasted our time. Here is the champagne. Here is a toast. After Lent, the Carnival!"
"After Lent, the Carnival!" cried the others, in the highest good humour, touching their glasses together.
"Why be ashamed?" said Monsieur Dupres, laughing heartily. "We have been married twenty years, Marie. Robert has been in Martinique. There, they are black. What of it?"
"What of it?" echoed Madame, filliping Robert on the nose and giggling uncontrollably.
"Embrace one another!" cried Monsieur Dupres, suddenly, and in a voice of thunder. He rose in his chair to put an arm round each of them. "Go on! Give her a kiss! She had a weakness for you in the old days. You didn't know that, my boy. But I know. I know everything. I remember on the night of our nuptials, I thought: 'She has a weakness for somebody.' Twenty years! Marie, you have never looked more beautiful than you look tonight. What is twenty times three hundred and sixty-five?" Overcome by the enormous figure that resulted, Monsieur Dupres burst into tears.
While he wept, the others, who were as drunk as he was, leaned across the table, their foreheads now and then colliding, while they chuckled inanely.
With the arrival of the brandy, Monsieur Dupres emerged into a calmer mood. "The thing to do," said he, "is to make up for lost time. Do you not agree with me?"
"Perfectly," said Robert, kissing him on both cheeks.
"Regard her," said Monsieur Dupres. "A woman of forty. Oh, if only those little shops were open! Robert, old friend, a word in your ear."
Robert inclined that organ, but Monsieur Dupres was unable to utter the promised confidence. He was capable of nothing but a sputter of laughter, which obliged Robert to use his napkin as a towel.
"To the devil with your little shops!" said Robert. "We need nothing. There are cafs, bars, bistros, botes, night clubs, cabarets, everything. To the boulevard, all three!"
With that, he sprang up. The others unsteadily followed him. On the street everyone looked at them with a smile. Madame's respectable grey hat fell over her nose. She gave it a flick, and sent it equally far over the back of her head. They linked arms, and began to sing a song about a broken casserole.
They visited several bars, and emerged from each more hilarious than before. The men, crouching down so that their overcoats trailed along the ground, shuffled along in imitation of dwarfs, as they had done in their student days. Madame was so excessively amused that she was compelled to retire into the midnight shadows of the little alley that runs between the Rue Guillaume and the Avenue des Gascons.
"I suppose," hiccuped Monsieur Dupres, when she rejoined them, "I suppose we should soon be going home."
Robert expressed his contempt for this notion wordlessly though not soundlessly. "Mes amis," said he, facing round, and putting a hand on a shoulder of each, while he surveyed them with a comical and a supplicating face, "mes amis, mes amis, pourquoi pas le bordel?" At this he was overcome by a fit of silly laughter, which was soon echoed by the others.
"It is, after all, the twentieth century," chuckled Monsieur Dupres. "Besides, we must consider our friend Robert."
"It is in the nature of an occasion," said Madame. "It is a little reunion."