She eyes him for a moment. “A Ballistics Mage, huh?”
“Resetter.”
“Chosen as a handicap?”
“Correct.”
“That sucks.” Dory un-shoulders her backpack and places it on the table. A logo of grinning dragon skull over a crossed war hammer and lightning bolt with the motto The Chrono School of Advanced Weaponry is branded into the front flap. “Lucky for you, you have friends – or should I say, you have a friend who has fans.”
FeeTwix’s eyes turn black. “Here for the unveiling of the new weapon, everyone. No longer will Ryuk be forced to use a sissy slingshot!”
Sissy? Ryuk thinks about kicking FeeTwix under the table.
Dory the Weaponsmith slips her hands into a pair of black gloves and takes a parcel wrapped in blue velvet out of the backpack. She unfolds the velvet, causing gasps from all around. “I give to you, the marble gun.”
The weapon is made of color case hardened metal, with Thulean script graven into the barrel. The grip panels are of polished lionwood and nicely counterpoint the weapon’s finish.
Before anyone can ask how it works, Dory places several empty magazines on the table and produces a magazine loaded with test marbles.
“The magazine goes into the back of the gun, where the hammer normally would be.” Dory demonstrates loading the weapon with her magazine of test marbles. She slaps it with her palm, clicks it in place, and sets the gun on the table.
Hiccup nods. “Not bad, Marbles. Finally, finally you won’t be a pussy.”
Zaena ruffles the goblin’s dollop of pink hair and he swats at her ghost limbs.
“The weapon doesn’t have a trigger as to prevent anyone else from shooting it, which also allows it to skirt around the Tritania rules of a firearm. I actually haven’t test fired it yet, as only one person can fire it and that is the person who bonds with it, flesh upon metal.”
She shows Ryuk her black gloves again. “Be advised: The first person to touch it locks their digital neuronal autocorrect system, D-NAS, with the gun’s algorithm. Don’t worry, it won’t whisper sweet nothings in your ear or anything like that, but you will be symbiotically linked to the weapon.”
Ryuk touches the grip and the gun instantly warms. He lifts the weapon, keeping the muzzle aimed at the ground. A feeling of coldness, followed by an intense heat radiates up his arm. It stops as it reaches the back of his skull.
Hiccup bites into another wing and chews loudly as Ryuk turns the weapon over in his hand.
“It’s … amazing,” Ryuk finally says. He instinctively stands and bows his head.
“Don’t say that until you’ve shot it.” Dory the Weaponsmith returns her attention to the empty magazines on the table. “You’ll need to load these yourself. I’ve supplied you with five for now, and each holds eight marbles. I can make more magazines though, and hopefully an extended mag, just give me a day or two.”
“Got it.”
“So what are we waiting for?” she asks with a shrug. “Let’s step outside and see how it shoots.”
“Let me know how it goes,” Hiccup calls after them. He returns to his dragon wings, notices that he’s almost out, and indicates to the hovering waitress he’d like yet another round.
The non-gurgitationally occupied Mitherfickers follow Dory the Weaponsmith out through a large double door. They head away from the café’s rotunda, to a more secluded area around back. FeeTwix points at a stump about ten meters away, near a Krikayan tandoori oven. Split billets of firewood surround the stump and an old, rusted covered ax isn’t too far away. “How’s that for a target?”
Ryuk takes aim at the stump and Zaena stops him.
“Let’s make it a bit more challenging.”
“I haven’t even test-fired it yet,” he reminds her.
“This will only take a second.” The Thulean approaches the stump and uses her ghost limbs to place a wedge of firewood on the stump, narrow end facing Ryuk. “Now show us what you’ve got, ballistics mage,” Zaena grins.
Ryuk lifts the marble gun with one hand and takes aim at the stump. “Um … how do I fire it exactly?”
“Come on, Ryuk, there are literally 650,000 people watching this right now!” FeeTwix announces.
Fire! Ryuk thinks to no effect. Fire! Fire! Fire!
“Maybe it’s jammed or something.”
Dory shakes her head. “You aren’t doing it correctly; the gun uses algomagic which is more felt than it is thought. It should be an extension of your being, if that makes sense. Don’t tense up or anything, and don’t overthink it. Just shoot it.”
“Just shoot it, got it.” Ryuk raises the weapon again. He focuses on the wedge of wood and as he does so, a sense of calm rushes over him. Just shoot it. He takes a deep breath and the wedge of wood flies off the stump.
Dory pumps her fist in the air. “You did it!”
“That’s impressive,” FeeTwix claps the weaponsmith on the back, “seriously, Dory, that’s some damn good work!”
“That was it?” Ryuk glances down at the weapon; the Thulean script graven on its barrel suddenly glows a vibrant green. He can hardly recall shooting the weapon; only that the wedge was knocked off the stump in the blink of an eye, almost as if he had done it with his mind.
“Again.” Zaena uses her ghost limbs to move two wedges onto the stump.
“Wait,” Ryuk says, “using this weapon is considered a skill right? Why didn’t I get a new skill prompt?”
“It’s not a skill,” Dory explains, “not in the sense that the term ‘skill’ is used here in Tritania. Skills are something acquired through a character’s actions, interactions, preferences, and choices. Yes, you can learn to use a new weapon and have this be a skill, but like I said, this particular gun uses algomagic, which is an extension of your being.”
“Algomagic?” FeeTwix asks.
The stout blacksmith explains, “Magic that affects the very algorithm of the game, algo-magic. There are other names for it used in other Proxima worlds.”
Ryuk takes aim at the two wedges of wood. They fly into the air and just like before, the Thulean script on his weapon glows green. “It’s so fast. I don’t even see the marbles coming, or going.”
Dory crosses her arms over her chest and gives them all a satisfactory nod. “This is just a taste of what’s to come, campers. Give me a few more days, and I’ll craft something truly amazing for you.”
Chapter 17: Boaster Toaster
Hiccup awaits them outside, his hands clasped beneath his distended belly, and he runs his tongue over his lips. “Holy shickin’ fit, boys and girl – them were some demonly delicious dragon wings. Are you fickers sure we don’t have time for me to order a to-go dozen? I still want to try the pepper dingleberry ones!”
FeeTwix turns to him. “The what?”
“Dingakburi,” Zaena says, “and no, we don’t have time. How do we get to Bar Row from here? That’s where we’re starting, isn’t it?”
“Correctemundo, Liz.” Hiccup picks up a stick, cops a squat and starts sketching in the sand. Dory the Weaponsmith is long gone and the four guildmates now stand outside the restaurant by the side of the brick paved road to Aramis. The sky was clear earlier, but ominous dark clouds have started to form, reminiscent of the ones they saw in the Hills of Hillshire the previous night.
“We have maps,” Ryuk reminds him.
“Sometimes you’ve gotta go old school,” says the goblin. “So X marks where we are, and now we’re going to go to Bar Row to do a little prodding. Then we’ll split up. Remember – Marbles and Lizzy will snoop around in the Guild District and get us a hostel; Twixy and I will stay in Bar Row. I hope everyone here is ready to pound a few.” He looks around.