‘Who cares?’
‘Wrong,’ Starbreeze said again, insistent.
‘She keeps saying that …’
‘Who cares?’ I wanted to get out of this place, walk outside the boundaries of the tomb and taste the night air, wanted it so badly I could taste it. Starbreeze was stopping me, and that was making me angry.
Luna hesitated. ‘Shouldn’t we listen to her?’
‘No!’ I said in frustration. ‘There’s nothing for us to go back for. We are done with this place!’
As I spoke, Luna started. ‘Wait!’
I was almost ready to kill Luna. ‘NOW what?’
‘There is someone we need to go back for. Sonder!’
I stared at her for a second. ‘Who?’
‘Sonder! Alex, you saw him, Griff hurt him, don’t you remember? He must be back in those corridors.’
‘He’s probably dead.’
Luna started as if I’d slapped her. ‘He’s not! He was breathing when Griff took me away. He could still be alive!’
I started to answer and suddenly came to a halt. Luna was right. When I’d last seen Sonder he’d been alive. Griff hadn’t killed the younger mage, he’d only stunned him. So why had I been so sure he was dead?
Luna was looking at me as if waiting for something. ‘What?’ I said at last.
‘Aren’t you going to …?’ Luna said. When I didn’t respond she trailed off.
‘We’ll go back for him later.’ I didn’t want to think about Sonder. I just wanted to get out.
‘He might be dead by then!’
‘Plenty more where he came from.’
Luna started again, her eyes going wide. ‘Why do we have to deal with this now?’ I said in irritation. ‘Let’s get out of here.’
‘I can’t believe you’re saying this! Alex, you were the one who told him to stay with us!’ Luna was staring at me in shock. ‘What about what you told me? You said that you shouldn’t let someone die if you could help it. I believed you.’
‘When did I …?’ I trailed off as I remembered telling Luna that. It had been after we’d helped Cinder and Rachel. Except I didn’t really believe it, it had just been something to say to-
No, it hadn’t just been something to say. I had believed it. I did believe it. Luna was right. I couldn’t just leave Sonder back there; I needed to go back and help him.
No, Sonder didn’t matter. What I needed was to get out.
Wait, that was wrong. Leaving Sonder in the middle of that maze would be like killing him.
But I didn’t care about that.
Yes, I did.
I made a noise and turned away, holding a hand to my forehead. I was getting a headache; it felt like there were two voices in my head at once. I paced back and forth between the walls of the tunnel. ‘I don’t know,’ I muttered. ‘Let’s just get out of here.’ I felt I’d be able to think clearly if I only got outside.
‘No,’ Starbreeze said urgently to Luna. ‘Wrong.’
‘Shut up,’ I snapped. Their voices were making the headache worse. ‘I don’t-’ I turned and saw that both Starbreeze and Luna were looking at me now, and both had the same strange look on their face. ‘What are you staring at?’
‘Back in the chamber,’ Luna said slowly. ‘You were ready to kill them.’
‘Of course I was!’
‘I’m not sorry about Griff,’ Luna said. Her left hand moved unconsciously to her crippled right side, but she seemed to have forgotten about her broken arm. She was staring at me intently. ‘But I’ve never seen you like that, not until-’ Luna stopped, and something changed in her eyes.
For some reason I felt a sudden stab of fear. I wanted to push past, make a run for the exit, but Luna and Starbreeze were blocking my way now, staring at me. ‘What?’
‘Alex?’ Luna asked, and all of a sudden her voice was very careful. ‘What happened when you picked up that thing?’ She gestured to the wand in my hand.
I opened my mouth to reply, and suddenly everything was silent and I was standing outside my body again. Luna and Starbreeze were looking at where I stood, but I couldn’t hear them any more.
I rolled my eyes. ‘Not you again.’
‘Are you going to stand around all day?’ Abithriax demanded, striding into view. He’d appeared right next to me in his red robes, and he looked seriously pissed off.
‘Shut up,’ I muttered. As soon as Abithriax had reappeared, my headache had gotten worse, bad enough that it felt like someone taking a hammer to my skull. Just talking was making me nauseous.
‘Listen, Verus,’ Abithriax said. His voice was on edge, tense. ‘I’ve been sitting listening to this conversation and I’m thoroughly bored with it. Just get us outside and I’ll teach you to help this Sonder boy however you want.’
‘Leave me alone,’ I said through clenched teeth. If only my head would stop hurting. ‘Why do you care about getting outside anyway?’
Something flickered in Abithriax’s eyes and I stopped. I’d only wanted to shut him up, but that look made me pay attention. I’d stumbled on something Abithriax didn’t want me to know. More than one thing. I shook my head. If only I could think straight.
‘Look,’ Abithriax said carefully. He’d calmed down again and his voice was calm, reasonable. ‘I’ve got nothing against the boy. It just wouldn’t be sensible to go back now. If we can get to somewhere with more facilities, then we can …’
Abithriax kept talking, but I wasn’t listening. I was looking up through the portal at the stars shining down from the night sky. Starlight. What did that remind me of?
‘… more safely,’ Abithriax was saying. ‘In any case-’
‘The greater power for the lesser,’ I said absently.
‘What was that?’
‘Abithriax?’ I said. All of a sudden my headache was gone. I could think clearly again, and all of my attention was focused on the man in front of me. ‘How do you know my name?’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘My name,’ I said pleasantly, and I didn’t take my eyes off him.
‘Well — your friend.’
I shook my head slowly. ‘Luna calls me Alex. Not Verus.’
‘One of the others, then.’
‘Which one?’
Abithriax hesitated. Just for a second his eyes shifted, and I saw something behind them, something calculating and cold.
No, it had always been there, I just hadn’t been looking for it. ‘I’ll open my mind to you, my knowledge and skill will be yours …’ Stupid, stupid, stupid. If I could look into his mind, he could look into mine. Why hadn’t I asked how someone who’d been sealed away two thousand years could speak perfect English?
‘Why do you want to get out of here so badly, Abithriax?’ I kept my voice friendly, but inwardly I was tensing. When I’d merged with Abithriax last time, I’d touched him. He might be a ghost to everyone else, but if I could get close …
Abithriax stood still for a long moment, then straightened. ‘All right.’
I tried to move, but Abithriax was faster. All of a sudden I was paralysed, frozen. There was no spell or gesture: one moment I was talking, the next rooted to the spot. All I could move was my eyes.
Abithriax walked forward. As he did he seemed to grow in presence, become larger, more there, as if until now he’d been holding himself back. The red streaks in his hair and beard stood out brightly, and all of a sudden they made me think of blood. ‘You just had to make this difficult, didn’t you?’
I couldn’t answer. Behind Abithriax, I could see Luna and Starbreeze. They were talking, speaking to my frozen body, but I couldn’t hear what they were saying. ‘Still, I suppose I should be impressed,’ Abithriax said. ‘Normally my wielders never even notice. The name was careless of me … lack of practice, I suppose, it’s been such a long time …’ He glanced at me. ‘You asked how I did it. I suppose it’s only fair. I was a mind mage. That was how I was able to imbue myself into my fateweaver. But I always hesitated to make that final jump … until the alternative was death. But once I’d adjusted to my new form, learning to control a bearer was quite straightforward …’