“Was it too much?”
“No. It was perfect.”
I felt him relax under me as if some unknown tension I hadn’t realized was there had dissipated.
“You are perfect.” He gently tugged on my hair until I was looking up at him. My ponytail was no more. He must have removed it at some point. “You are, you know.”
“Hardly,” I scoffed, but smiled. He was the perfect one. Maybe not to everyone else, but to me he was exactly what I needed, wanted. Staring up at him, I realized I wanted to give him everything. I wanted to stay with him forever. I wanted to live with him. When he’d first asked, I’d hesitated, worried something from his past would come up again and I wouldn’t be able to handle it. Separating from him while having no where to live would’ve only made it so much worse, but I realized we’d have to work our problems out if we lived together. “I’m going to need your help.”
“Anything.”
“Well, you see, this incredibly wonderful man asked me to move in with him, but I have a lot of stuff. I have a house I’ll need to rent or sell. There are a lot of things I need assistance with if I want to make it happen.” I watched as light blossomed in his eyes as it what I was saying sank in.
“You’ll move in?” he asked, shocked. It had only been hours since I’d refused his offer. “What changed?”
“You reminded me of everything we have together. How much I need you from the time I wake up to the time I fall asleep with your arms wrapped tightly around me. I can’t go back to sleeping alone. I don’t want to. I want to smell your morning breath and hear you snoring in the middle of the night. All of it. You being there when I get home from an exhausting day at work or when I need someone to vent to about horrible clients. Just you, all the time.” I planted a kiss on his slightly parted lips. “Do you still want me?”
“Absolutely,” he breathed against my mouth before closing the distance for a passion-fueled kiss. “Nothing would make me happier.”
“I do have a confession to make though.”
“Really? And what might that be?” He lifted his eyebrow.
“When we were apart… I broke rules,” I sighed. I really wasn’t up for another punishment, not so soon after the one I’d just gone through, but I wanted him to know everything.
“Hmm.” He pursed his lips. “Broke the rules, hmm?”
“Yes, sir. I masturbated many times a day. The compulsions were back stronger than ever before,” I admitted. I shifted away from him, feeling the crusty layer on my stomach. A shower was in order as soon as we made it through this conversation.
“Do you feel the compulsion now?” he asked, tilting his head.
“No, sir. I know that you will provide all the pleasure I need.” It was the truth — somehow when he was around, I no longer felt the need to touch myself or fulfill the compulsions I knew I’d probably always feel. Addictions never fully went away, as I had learned; it was simply having the tools to handle it that made me not give in. John was the best thing for me.
“Then I suppose I can let it slide. We were both in dark places and doing things that weren’t good for us.” I could tell from the glint in his eye he was remembering how he’d coped. I knew I’d never forget what I saw. The marks on his back would take a long time to fully heal so I’d have reminders of it until then. He barely seemed to notice them, which told me he’d been whipped more than once and was used to the residual pain from them. Thankfully, although he’d been whipped numerous times, the skin hadn’t been broken a single time.
I couldn’t help but wonder what he’d been through — what else was this man hiding about his past? While I didn’t want to push, I knew soon enough I would be poking around for answers. The only way we would ever last is if we finally shared all our demons. I would have to put mine out there as well and I wasn’t ready to do it yet, so I let him keep his secrets for a while longer.
Epilogue
John
Since I was without a secretary, I didn’t want to have to work, but I also had a lot of appointments to reschedule from taking the day off unexpectedly to fuck Alix senseless. That night while we lay in bed, she played on her phone while I glanced through résumés.
We had to figure out what to do with her house and get her moved in, but knowing she wanted to live with me was enough for now. The rest could come later.
She slapped her hand on the mattress and turned toward me with a huge smile on her face. “That’s it! I know who will be your secretary!” she exclaimed excitedly.
“Who?” She hadn’t mentioned anything about it before then so I really had no idea who she was talking about.
“Jennifer! She works downstairs and I think she’d be perfect. She’s a freak and super energetic. We were just talking and she said something about being tired of her job. I bet she’d fit in perfectly at your practice.” I’d never seen Alix so eager and excited about something outside of the bedroom or playroom.
“I don’t know,” I sighed, scratching my cheek while thinking about the perky woman I’d met many times. “She’s a little too energetic. I would have to deal with her every day and that might drive me crazy.”
“Oh, baby, I would help calm you down whenever you needed some release,” she soothed, running a hand over my bare chest.
“Let me think about it.”
“Okay.” She pouted and sat back defeatedly.
The next day I found myself welcoming Jennifer into the office so I could show her around. Turned out Alix was pretty good at convincing me to see things her way when she really wanted to. I couldn’t complain too much, as getting a replacement for Mariah so quickly would save me quite a few headaches. It didn’t matter to me she hadn’t given a two-week notice. The hotel would easily be able to replace her while it was much harder to get someone competent to work for me.
Before I knew it, the day was over. Between training Jennifer and calling my appointments to reschedule, the hours had flown by. Not to mention Alix stopped by at lunch time for a quickie on my desk. Yet again it turned out she made me forget where I was and what I normally did when she put her mind to it.
As I walked out of the building to collect Alix from the hotel, I spotted a blonde I would happily never see again. Mariah.
“This isn’t over, John. You are mine and I am not giving up on you so easily,” she said before walking away from me.
I had a stalker of my own it appeared. One who was hell-bent on destroying my relationship with Alix.
No, things with Mariah weren’t over. I would have to warn Alix and figure out a way to make Mariah see we were over no matter what she thought.
To Be Continued…
More Books By Rachael Orman
In The Moment Series (M/M/F Menage)
Part One – FREE
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Part Five
Her Series
Her Ride (Ryan & Ellis)
Her Journey (Melia & Patrick)
Her Run (Blaze & Monk)
Cravings Series
Lost Desires (Prequel) - FREE
Addict - FREE
Fiend
Yearning Series (M/F/F Menage)
Yearning Devotion
Yearning Absolution
Other Works
In Flight (M/F/M Menage – Short Story)
Loneliness Ebbs Deep – CoWritten by Adrian J. Smith – F/F – Monster Erotica
Love is a Mess Anthology – Bar Tryst (F/F Short)