"What is dishonor when one has power?" Walinda declared.
"Of course," Jedidiah replied, "if your master had Yen-Wang-Yeh's position and his honor wasn't enough to keep him performing his assigned duties, it would all be over at the end of the year. The Celestial Emperor would call on him to make his report, judge him bereft of his duties, and boot him out. Someone else would be assigned to his position. Your master would be without a job… Well, here we are."
They'd reached the iron gate in the wall surrounding the palace. The gate stood wide open, but standing in the gateway, serving as guards, were a number of fearsome, bull-headed creatures that stood over eight feet tall. Some were orange, some gray, some purple. They wore polished armor and ornate robes and were armed with swords and spears.
"Those are the go-zu-oni," Jedidiah whispered. "Don't ever get them mad at you."
The go-zu-oni guards addressed each arrival in a tongue Joel had never heard and pointed out where they should go. One of the bull-headed creatures stepped in front of Jedidiah and addressed him in short bursts in the same foreign tongue.
Jedidiah bowed low and held out a strip of copper engraved with symbols and characters Joel could not identify.
The go-zu-oni took the strip of metal, examined it briefly, and said something else to Jedidiah, then handed back the strip of metal.
Jedidiah bowed again, then instructed the others, "Follow me."
They stepped through the gate. A few paces inside, beyond the press of the crowd, Jedidiah halted. His companions stopped beside him.
"Lo," Jedidiah said, gesturing with his arm. "The Palace of Judgement."
Joel looked at the scene that lay before them. The palace was the size of a city, with thousands of buildings. Unlike a typical city, everything was orderly. Every building was constructed of red brick and stone, and the people moving between the buildings did so in an orderly fashion. There was bustle, but no pushing or shoving or disturbances. There were throngs of the dead in the entry courtyard waiting to enter different buildings, guarded by the go-zu-oni, yet the spacious courtyard still seemed almost empty. Joel guessed the courtyard could have held more than a few armies. Officials dressed in brightly colored robes carried armfuls of scrolls from building to building. Joel spotted a party of tanar'ri and another of baatezu arguing heatedly, but not fighting. A creature like an elephant standing on its hind legs stood addressing a pair of foxes, who also stood on their hind legs. Everything about the scene suggested duty and harmony. Joel stood in silent awe.
"Have we stopped for a reason?" Walinda asked.
Jedidiah chuckled. "No. No reason. Let's go, Joel." The older priest led them across the courtyard to the far right. They climbed a stair, passed through the archway of a building, and came out beneath an archway on the other side. Then they descended another set of stairs into a smaller courtyard. There, across the courtyard, stood a building with four staircases leading up to four arched doorways. Intelligent beings stood in four separate lines leading from the doorways, down the stairs, and out into the courtyard. Most of the beings were human, but there were many nonhumans as well, from centaurlike creatures with ram's horns on their heads to odd creatures that looked like metallic boxes with legs. Some of the beings chatted amicably with others in line, some slouched or griped impatiently, while still others stared straight ahead with blank expressions.
"Pick a line," Jedidiah told Walinda. "Of course, with your karma, any line you pick is going to be the one that moves the slowest."
"Why must we get in line?" Walinda asked.
"Because all these people want what you want, to fill out the proper forms to gain an interview with a bureaucrat who will grant them permission to appear before the tribunal that determines whether or not to recommend to Yen-Wang-Yeh's staff that they be allowed to use one of the portals. Since you're not from Kara-tur, and you're not dead, you'll need special permission. Don't cause any trouble while you're waiting. Courtesy is everything to these people. Should you offend someone who turns out to be married to the cousin of the mother of the official we may later have to deal with, then we could end up waiting in lines until Gehenna freezes over."
A palanquin carried by four go-zu-oni lumbered past them. Reclining on the heavily scented pillows within the box was a horse-headed creature. Human servants ran before the conveyance strewing rose petals at the go-zu-oni's feet, and others who followed behind gathered the petals back up.
"Who was that?" Joel asked.
"Some general of the animal kingdom whose mother got him his post," Jedidiah muttered.
"What are you going to do while I'm waiting?" Walinda demanded impatiently.
"I?" Jedidiah asked with a shocked expression. "I will be finding a contact so you don't have to wait in line. If all goes well, we'll be in Sigil before the end of the week. Come along, Joel," he said, turning and heading back up the staircase the way they'd come.
Joel hurried after his god, following him through the hallways of another building, down another staircase, through another courtyard, through another building, then out a moon-shaped door onto a balcony overlooking a garden courtyard with a small pond. Joel dallied at the rail of the balcony, as he was sure one was meant to do, to take in the beauty of the garden and admire the serenity of the scene. Bees buzzed among the gardenias, carp glided through the water, and birds twittered in the trees.
"Dawdle later," Jedidiah called from behind him. The older priest had circled the balcony and started down a wide staircase into the garden.
Joel hurried down the stairs, but Jedidiah held him back on the landing between the first flight of stairs and the second.
Eight identical bronze statues, covered in a green patina, flanked the staircase. The statues resembled some creature half-way between a dog and a lion. Jedidiah rapped sharply on the third lion-dog on the right. A hollow clank rang out into the courtyard.
A pale green light began to glow in the lion-dog's eyes. "Finder!" a voice cried out from inside the bronze statue. "You've come back to visit!"
"Just a short visit, Shishi," the older priest replied. "We're just passing through."
"Pooh," the voice inside the lion-dog pouted. "You're always just passing through. I suppose you want help."
Tin too old to wait in line, Shishi," Jedidiah said with a tired smile, "and too impatient. I need three passes to Sigil." "Ah. Not the usual destination of the dead. This may take a while. Will you sing for me tonight, Finder?" Shishi asked.
"You know I will. Oh, but while I'm here, my name is Jedidiah-a priest of Finder."
The light in the lion-dog's eyes blinked, giving the illusion that the statue blinked. "But you still look like Finder!" the voice said. "What sort of western custom is this?"
"Humor an old barbarian," Jedidiah implored, patting the lion-dog's metal head. "I'll be waiting in the garden.”
The green light in the lion-dog's eyes faded.
Jedidiah motioned to Joel with a jerk of his head, and together they walked down into the garden. They crossed a tiny bridge to an island in the center of the pond and sat on a bench in a pavilion overlooking the water.
"In case you hadn't guessed," Jedidiah explained, "Shishi is a spirit of a lion-dog. Even though he can't actually drink, he's a big fan of drinking songs of the western Realms. Gods only know why."
"Are you one of the gods who knows why?" Joel asked.
Jedidiah chuckled and shook his head.
"He'll keep me up until dawn singing for him and four hundred of his equally invisible friends. Still, it beats waiting in line."
An old woman in orange pants and robe came across the bridge and set down a tray just outside the pavilion. She bowed low to Jedidiah, then recrossed the bridge and disappeared behind a tree.