“Allison Kendell the portrait of virtue.” I sneered not knowing who I was really angry with Allison or myself.
“Oh sure that is why I defended the tobacco industry.” She flared suddenly. Realizing what she had said she turned away from me. This was something that Allison obviously had no intention of letting people know.
“You what?” I gasped in horror.
I could tell by the look on her face that she was desperately struggling for words. I swallowed hard and calmed myself. It wasn’t easy. “The tobacco industry! Jesus Christ these were the bad guys. Weren’t they? Calm down Stephanie deal with that one later for now focus on what started all of this.” Okay I had flown off the handle and I had no idea why. Allison had made her position clear and that position was that she was not an option. Despite all of her warnings I had crossed the line yet again. I took a deep breath and calmed myself. I touched her innocently. “Allison.” I began softly as I watched her chewing on her bottom lip. “Let’s stop this right now. I should have never tried to … . to start anything again. It was not my intention when I came up here tonight.”
“No I’m the one who is sorry.” Allison groaned. “You keep blaming yourself as if I did nothing. Then I am the one who gets upset. Damn why is this so hard?”
“Hey forget it.” I said gently. “Look we can stand here all night apologizing and blaming ourselves or I can go downstairs and get some sleep.” Allison smiled at my suggestion and we said our goodnights at a distance.
I retreated downstairs to the only woman that I was going to be with that night … Haley Ballister. I changed into my favorite flannel pajamas since the nights had grown cold in more ways than one. I picked up Haley’s journal and started to read where I had left off. It was June 14, 1862 and the war was raging and a young Haley had just met a beautiful woman in uniform.
As I unbuttoned the jacket of her uniform I thanked God for sending this vision of beauty to me. I removed her jacket slowly and then I unbuttoned her shirt. Beneath her garments I discovered bandages that she had wrapped tightly around her bosom. As I unwrapped each one I felt the excitement of a child on Christmas morning. Even now as I sit here writing these words my body tingles as I recall the sight of her nakedness standing before me. I poured a hot bath. Anna had instructed me to prepare the hot water for my special guest earlier. At the time I had no idea just how special my guest would be.
I lowered my beauty into her bath. Her face glowed. After all that she has endured the hot water must have felt like walking through the pearly gates. While she soaked in the warm water. I gathered up her clothing and raced down the back staircase. I gave them to Sam on of the handy men. I paid him what little money I had to have him clean and stitch the uniform. I know that washing the uniform of a southern officer was not a pleasure for Sam. I had to plead with him to do it. Finally he agreed to do it for me. Washing the clothing of any white man was the last thing Sam every wanted to do again. But for me he did it and refused to take my money. In a few days Sam was to be heading north. I know that I would miss him and I was truly sorry for what I had asked him to do. But I could never tell him my true reasons why.
Upon returning to my room I found my sweet angel just as I had left her. I washed her back and gently scrubbed her raven hair. With each touch I felt my heart beating faster and faster. After bathing her completely, I stood beside that old tub and disrobed. I stood there exposing all that I am. She smiled at the sight. I climbed into the bathtub offering myself to her. With each touch I could hear her pleasure. She pulled me to her body and kissed me as I had never been kissed before. As she released me she asked me to take her to bed. How could I refuse? I obeyed without protest.
I dried off my soldier and led her to my bed. I pulled back the bedding and lowered her down onto the bed. We laid together our bodies touching. I kissed her neck and tasted the sweetness of her shoulders. I looked into her deep blue eyes and swept her black hair from her face. I kissed her again and again. I asked her name. She did not answer. “Tell me your name. Before I give myself to you I must know who you are. Your secret will be safe with me. But I must know who has captured my heart.” Never had I needed to hear anything so desperately. “Eleanor.” Was all she said before taking my body.
We loved until the call of the rooster disturbed our bliss. We pulled the bedding around us and held each other tightly. Each of us knowing that this could be the last time we would ever see the other. I asked her where she had come from before finding herself here. “We just finished out running the Yankees in the Shenandoah Valley. We walked for days. I thought we would never stop walking. But Old Jack got us into trouble and we had no choice but to keep moving ahead of the Yankees.” I was amazed by the courage that my love possessed. Yes I think of her as my love. Perhaps this is presumptuous of me but I cannot help myself.
I asked her why she was pretending to be a man. She explained that Stephan was her brother and that she knew that the Yankees were approaching and New Orleans would more than likely fall. Stephan had sold off everything he could not carry with him and then he ran to Florida. Eleanor thinks he may be in England by now. I was stunned. I asked how he could just leave her behind. She explained that Stephan was a coward who did not care about their home. She laughed as she told how because of her actions in battle Stephan would be remember as a hero while everyone thinks that she died in the fire that claimed the family plantation.
I had so many questions for my lady. Eleanor answered as many as she could. Before the war she had been a schoolteacher in Baltimore. After the incident at Fort Sumter she returned home and continued to run slaves to the North. She had been involved with helping free slaves for many years. Home was a large plantation in New Orleans, which her brother controlled. According to Eleanor he was a scoundrel. He had sent their parents to Newport so he could take over the plantation in their absence. Now they were trapped in Rhode Island and he had taken the family fortune. This bastard even tried marrying her off to an elderly neighbor. Stephan had hoped to gain control of the neighboring plantation.
When word reached New Orleans of the Yankees approach, most of the troops left to fight with General Lee. The Southern Navy would never hold the Union Army on the Mississippi. Stephan fled and Eleanor took his place and raced down to Natchez and joined Company B. Because of Stephan’s social standing she was made an officer. She wasn’t afraid of dying and she had killed others in battle. She was afraid of being captured or discovered. Her fear was that she could not rely upon her captors to behave like gentlemen. She made it clear to me that she was not fighting because she believed in slavery. She did not. She was fighting because New Orleans was her home. She told me that even though she was a woman she did understand that this war had nothing to do with slavery. I do not understand what she means by this.
When she left my bed this morning in her freshly pressed uniform I was breathless. She promised to return to me if she could. Until then I will have my memories of her touch. The sweetness of her taste and how I held her body. Unlike Emily this woman gave herself freely and took only what I offered. I was so taken with her that I offered her everything.
June 25, 1862
I find myself unable to perform for my guests. My only thoughts are of Eleanor. Is she safe? She promised to write but she needed to be cautious with her words. Each day I pray to hear something. I need some sign that my love is alive and will be returning to me.
August 4, 1862
More of the girls have left as well as most of the hired hands. Still no word from Eleanor. Anna and I busy ourselves with the much-needed repairs to the house. I no longer wish to entertain gentleman. Anna has agreed that it is time to close the business and convert the house into an Inn. Our carpentry skills are lacking and the roof will not stop leaking.