“Because I have no secrets.” Allison’s voice trembled. “In a matter of a few weeks you know everything there is to know about me. Jesus Stephanie we never even dated. But you know my entire past. I’m completely exposed. You even stepped in and solved my legal problems. I’ve nothing to offer you.”
“What about your heart?” I said deeply.
“I tried that.” Allison winced. “I asked you out and you shot me down every time.”
“I thought that you were dating Courtney!” I explained in a huff.
“That’s another reason we should stop this.” Allison shot back. “How could you not trust me like that?”
“Because when you did bother to come home she was there.” I tried to explain.
“I was helping her study for the Bar Exam.” Allison explained. “Damn it you know me. How could you think that I would be so shallow as to sleep with her then ask you out?”
“Because she told me that she had slept with you.” I fired back. There it was finally out and it felt good.
“What?” Allison gasped. She stood there completely stunned.
I took a few breaths and collected myself before speaking. I had to make her see what I had seen and why I thought what I thought. “The morning after Halloween.” I began to explain calmly. “Courtney told me that the two of you slept together.”
I watched as Allison’s expression changed rapidly from stunned to outrage. “That little …” Allison sputtered. “I swear to you Stephanie I never touched her. The only reason she spent the night was because she had been drinking and was in no condition to drive. When she tried something I let her down gently. I explained that I wasn’t interested in her that way. I also was very honest about my feelings for you and how it looked as if we might finally have a chance to explore a relationship. She said she understood.”
“Of course she did Allison.” I laughed. “But being the bright girl that she is the first thing she did was run to me and tell me about having sex with you. She knew I’d back off.” I shook my head at the irony of the situation. “Allison I did not discover the truth until very recently.”
“Yes she’s a very clever girl.” Allison said coldly. “She made certain she got to you before I did. You must have thought that I was a first class jerk asking you out after sleeping with her.” Allison shivered as she spoke.
“Jerk was one of the nicer things I was thinking about you.” I confessed. “There something else. I didn’t realize that you were asking me out. For a date I mean. You were weren’t you?”
“Yes.” She asserted and then her face dropped. “I keep forgetting this is all new to you.” She apologized sincerely.
“So now that this is all out in the open where does this leave us?” I looked at her hopefully surprised by the tears now running down her face. I rushed to her side quickly. She simply took me by the hand and led me back to the car. Allison opened the door for me and I seated myself. She closed the door and walked to the other side of the car and got in.
I watched as the normally stoic woman dried her tears and collected her thoughts. “Allison what is it?” I asked softly taking her hand in mine.
“I took the position at Stanford.” She said gravely.
“That’s it?” I laughed thinking that what was bothering her. “Allison I’m not thrilled but it is only for six weeks. I will miss you but …” She held up a shaking hand and stopped me.
“Stephanie I agreed to an extended series for the seminar.” She answered as the panic washed over her. “I’ll be gone for four months.”
“Four months?” I shrieked. Then I quickly calmed myself this was not the end of the world. After everything we had been through this separation was a mere drop in the bucket. “When did this happen?”
“Right before my birthday.” She explained. “Of course had I been thinking clearly on that day we wouldn’t be sitting here now.”
“Oh of course we would.” I laughed. “So why did you agree to it?”
“I thought that the time apart would be good for us.” She sighed. “Somehow my going to California would give us the distance that we need and maybe our friendship would survive. Then the other night everything was coming out and suddenly I realized what I had done and I panicked. How could we start seeing each other now? I’ll be leaving in a few weeks and it’s not fair to you. You just came out you should be out meeting women and dating.”
“You are insane.” I said in dismay. “I’ve already gone out and met other women. One of which landed me in the emergency room. Thank you very much. Allison do you want me to go out with other women?”
“No.” She answered sadly.
“Then what is the problem?” I asked her directly. “Allison I know how my heart feels. I love you.” I finally told her and it felt good! “I love you now and I will still love you four months from now.”
“You can’t know that.” She warned me. “But if it is true and when I come home and we both still feel the same way then let’s start things off right this time. What we have had up until now has been … I honestly don’t know what it has been.”
“Bedlam.” I offered teasingly.
“Pretty much.” She laughed in agreement. “For now let’s just be friends and put all of this tension behind us.” I’d rather put you behind me but I can go along with this even if I think the whole idea is ludicrous. “So can you wait?” She asked me sweetly.
“I have spent my whole life looking for you.” I said as I gently touched her cheek. “I can wait until …”
“April.” She concluded with a heavy sigh. “Stephanie I’m not being foolish. You could meet someone while I’m away.”
“So could you.” I argued. “I will leave it up to the fates. Deep down I know that we are meant to be together. I also know that even though I don’t agree with this I can try. Though I doubt we will wait.”
“What do you mean?” She protested.
“Allison we’ve had better reasons than this to keep our hands off of one another.” I explained. “And we’ve failed miserably.”
“Stephanie …”
“I’m serious.” I offered in my own defense. “I’ll go along with this plan of yours but I’m telling you right now you’ll never make it.”
“I’ll never make it?” Allison snorted as she started the car and pulled back into traffic.
“You won’t.” I reasoned with a touch of humor.
“And what makes you so certain that I will be the one to cave in?” Allison protested in a cocky tone. “I’m an adult and I think that I’ve behaved fairly well under the circumstances.”
“Sure whatever you say.” I answered blithely.
“Stephanie.” Allison wasn’t about to drop this. “I am very serious about us waiting.”
“I know.” I responded. “I promise to behave myself. If this is what you want I will wait.”
“But you don’t think I will?” Allison argued.
“Nope.”
“And just why not?” Allison was on the defensive. “As I recall most of our close calls were not initiated by me.”
“True.” I agreed. “You’re right Allison. I’m sure that you can control yourself for the next month and a half.” Come on Allison take the bait.
“That’s right.” She said sternly.
I allowed her to drive in silence while she stewed over what I had said. I knew that I had challenged her and it was just a matter of time before she would bring the subject up again. “I can show as much restraint as the next guy.” Allison snapped finally.
“Of course you can.” I patted her gently to reassure her.
“You really think that I’m going to cave in?” Allison whined at the thought that I could doubt her.