“I still feel badly about leaving Jane for three weeks,” he confessed to her.
“Don't,” she said, laying her head back against him. “We have a right to it. We've hardly had any time alone.” She was right of course but he still remembered how sad Jane had looked earlier that night when she had objected to staying with Tracy.
“She's so little though …she's only five …what does she know from honeymoons?”
Liz smiled at him with a sigh. She was sorry to leave her too. She seldom had before. But this time she felt she had to for their sakes, and she had come to terms with that. She was comfortable about it now, but it pleased her that he was so concerned about how Jane felt. He was going to be a wonderful father. “You're a big softie, you know that. A giant marshmallow.” She loved that about him. He was the sweetest man in the world, and when Jane turned up in their bed again that night, he lifted her in gently so they wouldn't wake her mother up, and he cuddled her close to him. She was beginning to feel like his own child, and he was surprised himself at the love he had for her. They tiptoed out of bed the next day, brushed their teeth side by side, and made breakfast for Liz, and brought it to her on a tray with a rose in a vase that Bernie put there for her.
“Happy wedding day!” they intoned simultaneously, and she looked up with a sleepy smile.
“Happy wedding day, you guys …when did you get up?” She looked at Bernie, then at Jane, and suspected there was a conspiracy she didn't know about, but neither of them would confess and she sat up to eat the breakfast they had made.
Bernie disappeared after that, and went to his friend's to dress. The wedding was at noon, and they had plenty of time, as Liz carefully braided Jane's hair with thin white satin ribbons. She put on the beautiful white velvet dress they had chosen together at Wolffs, and Liz put a little crown of baby's breath in her hair. She wore little white socks, and brand-new black patent leather Mary Janes, and a navy blue wool coat Bernie had bought in Paris for her. She looked like a little angel as she stood at the door, waiting for Liz, who took her hand and walked outside to the waiting limousine Bernie had ordered for her. She wore a white satin Dior dress, with big bell sleeves and a skirt that stopped at her ankles, so one could see the equally exquisite Dior shoes. Everything she wore was the color of antique ivory, including the matching headpiece that held back her hair as it cascaded down her back like a young girl's. She looked incredible and Tracy looked at her with tears in her eyes.
“May you always be as happy as you are right now, Liz.” She brushed away her tears and smiled down at Jane. “Your mom sure looks good, doesn't she?”
“She does.” Jane gazed at her mother admiringly. She was the prettiest lady she had ever seen.
“And so do you.” Tracy gently touched the braids, remembering her own little girl, and they got into the car and drove to Arguello Boulevard and got out at Temple Emanuel. It was beautiful, and there was something awesome about it as they walked inside. Liz felt her breath catch and her heart pound as she squeezed Jane's hand tight, and the little girl looked up at her as they exchanged a smile. It was a big day for both of them.
Bill Robbins was waiting for her in a dark blue suit, his sober gray beard and kind eyes making him look like a church elder, and the guests were already sitting in the pews as the music began, and suddenly Liz realized what was happening. It had all been like a dream up till then, and now suddenly it was real, and as she looked down the aisle, she saw Bernie standing there, with Paul Berman next to him, and the Fines in the front pew. But it was only Bernie she saw now, bearded, handsome, dignified, waiting for her, as she walked slowly down the aisle to him, to begin her new life.
Chapter 12
The reception at the Alta Mira was a great success, and everyone seemed to have a good time as they stood on the terrace and looked at the view. It wasn't as elaborate as one of the big hotels might have been but it had more charm and Liz had always loved the quaintness of it, and Bernie agreed with her. Even his mother couldn't find fault with anything. Bernie danced with her for the first dance, and his father with Liz and then they switched, and after a little while, Paul Berman cut in on him, and Bernie danced with Tracy while Paul danced with Liz. And after that Bernie danced with Jane, who was thrilled to be included in the ritual. “So what do you think, old girl? Is everything okay?” “Yup.” She looked happier again, but he was still worried about leaving her when they went away. He was taking his brand-new parental responsibilities to heart and Liz had teased him about it again the night before. She worried about Jane too, and she had hardly ever left her in the past five years, but she knew that she'd be safe with Tracy, and they had a right to their honeymoon after all.
“I'm Jewish, what do you expect?” He had claimed finally. “Guilt is important to me.”
“Use it on something else. She'll be fine.” And after his dance with her, he led her to the buffet and helped her collect everything she wanted there, and he deposited her next to her new grandmother and went off to dance with his wife again.
“Hello.” Jane looked up at Ruth, who was staring carefully at her. “I like your hat. What kind of fur is it?” Ruth was somewhat taken aback at the question, but she thought her a pretty child, and fairly polite from what she'd seen of her so far.
“It's mink.”
“It looks nice with your dress …the dress is the same color as your eyes. Did you know that?” She was fascinated by her as she looked at every detail, and in spite of herself Ruth smiled at her.
“You have beautiful blue eyes.”
“Thank you. They're like my mom's. My father is dead, you know.” She said it matter-of-factly, with her mouth half full of roast beef, and suddenly Ruth felt sorry for her. It couldn't have been an easy life for Liz or the girl before Bernie came along. She saw Bernie in the light of a savior now, but so did Liz, so there was no harm in that. Neither Liz nor Jane would have disagreed with her. Only Bernie might.
“I'm sorry to hear about your dad.” She didn't know what else to say.
“Me too. But I have a new daddy now.” She looked proudly at Bernard, and Ruth's eyes filled with tears. And then Jane looked unexpectedly at Ruth. “You're the only grandmother I have, you know.”
“Oh.” She was embarrassed for the child to see her cry. And she reached out and touched her little hand. “That's very nice. You're my only grandchild too.” Jane smiled up at her adoringly and squeezed her hand.
“I'm glad you're so nice to me. I was scared before we met.” Bernie had introduced them that morning at the temple, very carefully. “I thought maybe you'd be real old, or mean or something.”
Ruth looked horrified. “Did Bernie say that to you?”
“No.” She shook her head. “He said you were wonderful.” Ruth beamed at her. The child was adorable, and she patted her hand and caught a cookie off a passing tray and handed it to her. Jane broke the cookie in two, and handed her the remaining half, which Ruth ate, still holding her hand. The two were fast friends by the time Liz went to change out of her wedding gown. And as Jane saw her mother disappear and realized what time it was, she suddenly began to cry silently, as Bernie caught a glimpse of her from across the room, and came hurrying to her side.
“What's the matter, sweetheart?” His mother had gone for a last dance with the father of the groom. Bernie bent and put an arm around her.
“I don't want you and Mommy to go.” Her voice was a tiny wail, and he felt his heart breaking in half.
“We won't be gone that long.” But three weeks seemed an eternity to her, and he wasn't sure he disagreed with her. It seemed like a hell of a long time to leave her with someone else, and as Tracy approached, Jane only cried more, and a moment later Ruth had returned, and Jane clung to her as though she'd always known her.