We roll into the driveway, and I look out the back window.
“Impressive,” I say as I step out, and it is: beachfront property, two-story house with an attached garage that is also two stories. The siding and the landscaping are new. It’s lit up by sidewalk lights leading to a screened in porch.
We walk inside where I see Xavier and Taelyn, Nickie D, the guys from Inappropriate Thoughts, and Memphis and Tales.
The lead singer raises his bottle to me and nods.
“They sign?” I ask.
Billy laughs. “Yeah, about a month ago. Where the fuck have you been?”
I follow Billy and River over to the lead singer. He’s tall and lean, inked down his arms and up his neck. He has a Mohawk and nose piercing.
“Deeds, you remember Finn?”
“Sure do. Nice to see you again, and thanks for the heads up on Stockton and intro to Steel.” He doesn’t shake my hand but hands me a beer.
“No thanks necessary. Any time I can stick it to that bastard and save someone from making the same mistake I did…” I pause when I see her walking out of a doorway and toward us. She hasn’t seen me yet, but she is scanning the place like she knows I’m here. When her eyes meet mine, she takes in a quick, short breath and stares at me. Fuck!
I look away and right at Billy. “Thanks for the fucking heads up, asshole.”
“Heads up on what, Sonya?”
“What the hell do you think I’m talking about?”
“She’s been in and out of the office for a month now, once, sometimes twice a week. Has a cute, little kid with her most of the time. He’s a great—”
I turn and walk away while he sings her praises.
I make it to the door and step out, needing some air, some space, some—
“Hello, Finn,” she says, and then I hear the door shut.
I don’t say a word. I can’t. I’m afraid of what will come out.
“Okay, well, I just want you to know I still don’t want to kill you.” she laughs, then stops. “What I mean is, if I make you uncomfortable, I will leave, but if there is any chance you’d like to talk—” Her voice breaks, and she sucks in a slow breath of air. “If there is any way you can forgive me, I would love that.”
I snap my head around and look her in the eyes. “I don’t want to kill you, either, but I am telling you it’s best if you go back inside.”
“I know you want me. I know I want you, and I know what’s best for me, and that’s anything you can give me.”
I take her hand and drag her out the door, walking fast.
I open the doors to the SUV River drove us in and tell her. “Is fucking me in the backseat of this vehicle best for you right now?”
She nods furiously.
“Then get in.”
She climbs in the back.
“Now don’t you fucking move.”
“I won’t. I promise. I love—” I slam the door before she finishes and storm toward the house where River is walking out.
“You want a smoke?” he asks, pulling out a pack of cigarettes.
“No, I want you to go take her back to wherever she is staying. I can deal with her working at Forever Four, but not being here.” I pull out my phone and look for a cab company.
“Finn, the chick is in love with you. You obviously have feelings for her, and—”
“If you value this friendship, you will get her home. Now!”
He nods then turns and walks to the vehicle.
I press call as he opens the back door, and she climbs out then gets in the front. I watch as she covers her face with her hands, and I feel like I am going to fucking lose it.
The number is busy, so I hang up and try again. They answer, and I give them the address.
At home, I walk in the house, feeling like hell, worse than hell. I grab the Jack Daniels bottle off the counter and suck down a quarter of it, screw the cap back on, and go to my room where I lie there and think about the girl I just did a favor by pushing away.
***
I wake to Billy yelling. My head is pounding, and I still have a slight buzz. I look at the clock, and it has only been an hour since I lay down.
He flips on the light and I cover my eyes.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
“There’s been an accident. Get dressed and let’s go.”
“What the hell are you—”
“River and Sonya, a truck hit them ten miles away from Memphis’s place.” His voice cracks. “Just get the fuck up! Get up now and get dressed!”
I jump up and immediately feel a wave of nausea hit hard. I pull on a pair of running pants and a sweatshirt is halfway over my head when I walk out the door.
“Shoes! Get some fucking shoes!”
“Fuck, son of a bitch!” I stammer as I open the door and grab my slides.
I then run to the car, jump in, and close the door as he peels out of the driveway.
He hits his GPS. “Jersey Shore University Medical. Quickest route.”
The route takes us back by Memphis’s place and past the scene of the accident where River’s new ride is fucking totaled. And when Billy said truck, he didn’t mention a semi. The driver’s side door looks to be where the collision took place.
“What do you know?” I ask.
“I know you need to tell people where the fuck you are going when you leave, and so does he. I know, when I couldn’t find either of you, I called a cab, and we sat behind a line of cars until traffic was cleared. Then I found out about the fucking accident that way. What the fuck was he doing with her?”
“I told him to take her home. I insisted he take her fucking home.” I punch the dash a few times and slam myself back in the seat. “This is my fucking fault.”
At the hospital, we pull in and both run to the ER entry. Memphis and Tally are in the waiting room, and so are Xavier and Taelyn. None of them look good.
“How are they?” Billy asks.
“River’s a fucking mess, but alert. He was talking all sorts of shit to Sonya.”
“How is she?” I ask.
“They’re both going to live, but River is fucked up. His arm is all tore up, his leg, his fucking …” Memphis stops, and Tally pulls his head down onto her shoulder.
“They’re going to be fine. Sonya is going to get some x-rays to make sure she has no broken bones. She’ll need some stitches. She has”—Tally sniffs—“glass in her head and—”
“When can we see them?” I interrupt.
“When someone comes out and tells us we can,” Xavier says with no emotion in his voice.
We all stand. None of us can sit. Taelyn is on the phone with someone—I assume Josephina Steel—and from what I can gather, Noah is with her and baby Patrick.
In about an hour, the door opens and a doctor walks out.
“River is asking for Xavier and Finn. Sonya is asking for no one, but she is going to be fine.”
“I’d like to see her for a moment,” Taelyn says quickly.
“She’s trying to rest, but I will allow it for a couple minutes.”
Xavier and I follow Taelyn and the doctor through the doors and down the hall.
When Xavier and I walk in the room, River is out of his mind, high on pain meds.
“I’m so fucked.” He laughs and runs his right arm over his hair. “I need surgery, pins and rods, and—”
“You’ll be okay, man. You’re alive; that’s all that matters,” I say, sitting next to him.
He busts out laughing. “I’m not sure you’ll want me to be fine after the little fucking PI over there gets to you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Xavier chuckles at him.
“I’m the motherfucking joker.” River pulls up his sleeve. “And you”—he points to me—“are not. Light and dark, black and white, you and me, bro.”
The doctor comes in and says they are ready to take him up to surgery.
“You and me, River … you and me.” I smile and nod. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I sent you to take her home.”
“Just get the fuck out of here,” he says to me with a disgusted look on his face. “You won’t be sorry.”
The nurse puts something in his IV that almost immediately takes him down about ten notches.
“Light and dark, black and white,” he says to me right before he says, “Jesse was mine, too,” and passes out.
Xavier looks at me as they wheel him out of the room. “What the hell is he talking about?”
I shrug as rage boils inside of me.