She wasn't sure she did. Every time she thought about it she felt a rising panic. “It's . . . difficult. I could be wrong. It could be a complete stranger.”
“And you don't want it to be your father. There's a basic instinct that makes us want to believe in the goodness of our parents. You recognized it in Carmela. That's probably why you were in denial all these years.”
“You have it all figured out. It's not that easy.”
“I never said it was easy.” He paused. “You're not ready yet, are you? You won't let me help you.”
“I believe I've had enough of your help.”
“No, you haven't. But that's okay. You need time to absorb the shock and become accustomed to the idea that you can't hide any longer.”
“I'm glad you think it's okay.” Her voice was laden with sarcasm as she got to her feet. “I'd hate not to have your approval. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to find George and see if he's found out anything more about that woman friend of Trask's.”
He nodded. “You do that.” He stood up. “And, as I'm sure you'd prefer I stay out of your way for a while, I'll tend to a few of those earthshaking matters I mentioned.”
“What?”
He smiled. “I got a phone call from Travis. Rosa's arriving at the airport in a couple hours.”
“Louisville DFACS has released her?”
“Into Ledbruk's custody. It took some high-level arm-twisting to ignore all the red tape connected with kids removed from the parental home, but they finally did it.”
Relief rushed through her. “Why didn't you tell me?”
“You were a little preoccupied. I'm going to pick her up and take her to the safe house Ledbruk's arranged for her.”
“Why not bring her here?”
“You promised Carmela that Rosa would be safe. Do you really think we'd provide the safest haven for her? You're a prime target, and Trask would get the greatest enjoyment out of taking me out.”
He was right. The greater distance Rosa was from either of them, the safer she'd be. Kerry just didn't like the idea of a child not having anyone but Secret Service agents around her. “She's only twelve.”
“I'm sure Ledbruk will arrange to have a female agent stay with her. And I'll get a phone number from Ledbruk where you can call her.”
She guessed that was as good as it was going to get. “Explain everything to her. Tell her Carmela will be—”
“Oh, for God's sake, I'm not going to just throw her out of the car and into the arms of the law,” he said sharply. “I do have some sensitivity. Hell, I like kids.” He started down the steps. “I'll see you when I get back.”
He was angry again, and she could almost feel the sting of the barbs in his voice. Well, she couldn't help it. She wasn't about to try to soothe him right now when she was being jabbed by a few thorns of her own.
A few? That was an understatement. She felt torn and bruised and, yes, scared. Silver had ripped aside the dark curtain of lies she'd been telling herself for years, leaving her naked and vulnerable. She wanted that curtain back. It had hidden a horror she didn't want to face yet.
But when would she want to face it? She couldn't go back. Silver, with his usual brutal efficiency, had made sure she wouldn't be able to deceive herself again.
What was she thinking? Fear was one thing, self-deceit was another, and she'd had her fill of it. She wasn't prepared to delve deep into that memory right now, but she'd have to confront it soon.
“Good.” Silver was looking at her over his shoulder as he paused before getting in the car. “That's what I hoped when I—”
“I don't care what you hoped,” she said coldly. “And stay the hell out of my mind. You've worn out any welcome you might ever have had.”
He shrugged. “It was only a matter of time before that happened. It's not as if I wasn't expecting it.” He opened the car door. “I'll see you later.”
She had hurt him. She could sense the rawness of his pain as if it were her own. Jesus, she couldn't let him do this to her. She pushed him away, blocking him. That was better. She was stronger than she had thought. She had learned a great deal from him in the past days. Soon she might be entirely free of him. No closeness. No togetherness.
Wrenching pain. Terrible loneliness.
She'd get over it. This addictive intimacy was unhealthy, and Silver had proved he couldn't be trusted not to try to control her. Just because he'd done it because he thought it was in her best interests was no real excuse. He was in a position of power, and he'd misused that power.
She watched him back up and then head down the driveway. It was the first time in days that he'd left the estate without her. Was Trask out there waiting?
Trask would love to get rid of me too.
Why was she worrying when she'd determined she had to fight her way out of this bizarre relationship? Ledbruk's agents would follow Silver and guard him. Dammit, she would not watch him drive toward the gates. Block him out. Get on with life. Find a way to locate Trask.
She turned and went into the house to search for George.
George was on the telephone when Kerry went into the library, but he hung up almost immediately. “Yes?”
“What did you find out about Trask's Helen?”
His brows lifted. “It took you long enough to come and ask me about her.”
“I'm asking now. I was a little preoccupied with something else.”
“That was obvious. I hoped to take the heat off Brad, but evidently you weren't to be distracted.”
“No, but you can distract me now. What did you find out?”
“I believe the lady's full name was Helen Saduz.” George went through the pages in front of him on the desk. “Here it is.” He handed her a dossier. “Though there's every possibility that it was an assumed identity and she was in this country illegally.”
“Is that why no one could tell us who she was?”
He shook his head. “No one told us because no one wanted anyone to know what happened to her.”
She frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Do you remember that the report stated that Trask's lab was blown up by orders from the White House?”
She nodded.
“Well, she was in the lab.”
Kerry's eyes widened. “What?”
George gestured. “Boom. The lab went up and so did Helen Saduz.”
“How did that happen?”
“We think that Trask sent her to the lab to retrieve something he'd left behind.”
“What?”
He shrugged. “Papers, maybe a prototype of some kind . . . Anyway, she had the bad luck to be there when they blew the building.”
“But surely they'd have searched for anyone on the premises?”
“The building was sealed. There wasn't supposed to be anyone there. Any search would have been minimal.”
“How would she have even gotten in if the building was sealed?”
“Trask must have told her how to do it. He evidently had to have had a way of getting past security when he was stealing components and information from the other people on his team before he took off.”
She looked down at the photo on the sheet he'd given her. The woman was brunette, in her twenties with classic features. “She's beautiful.”
He nodded. “Absolutely. And memorable. Which was a break for us. Because there wasn't much to identify when they found her in the ashes. They could tell the age and sex by the skeleton, but the rest was guesswork. Or should I say legwork? None of his coworkers had seen Trask with her, but that wasn't unusual. He was a loner and didn't hobnob with any of them. The Service sent agents to backtrack to all Trask's favorite restaurants and found a few waiters who remembered her. They had an artist render a likeness from their descriptions and then sent it to the database. It came up with Helen Saduz.”
“Greek?” Kerry was reading the dossier. She stiffened. “And her father is Iranian?”
“Right. Trask was probably negotiating with Iran before the project was even completed. They sent Helen Saduz to clinch the deal. She was smart, well educated, and very accomplished at persuading men to do what she wanted. As you can see by her background, she was an agent who used sex to lure at least four scientists to come over to Iran's camp.”