“Love is what it is. It’s not logical. And say what you want, but you’re glowing with it.”
“I’ve known about him for years, and I have no idea where he’s even from.”
“But did you really know him? And does knowing his background really change how you’ll feel about him, or who he is now?”
“No.” Gavin felt more than nervous, because her words held a ring of truth. “We had sex. A couple times.” He couldn’t believe he’d blurted that out, but Kitty made him feel like he could share anything. And he didn’t think she consciously manipulated him to share. He just needed to talk to someone about this.
“Yeah. Jack and I discussed this mission. The thing is, with you, sex leads to emotion. It opens the same door with Aidan. He just shuts it before it can become anything lasting. No boyfriends, no long-term commitments. But Gavin, he’s feeling something fiery for you. Be careful. You can help set him free; just don’t get blown up in the process.”
She looked in the mirror, fixed her hair, and smoothed her shirt. Then she pulled him with her to the door.
His mind was reeling. Aidan felt something fiery? What did fiery mean, exactly? And why the hell was his heart racing like a jackrabbit? “Why is everyone always tugging me like a dog on a leash?”
“Because you’re as cute as a puppy. I want to rub your ears,” she teased, unlocked the door, and pulled him out of the bathroom past a few surprised and annoyed women.
When Kitty saw them, she stopped. “I’m so sorry. My friend felt ill. His boyfriend isn’t working out.” She shook her head.
Gavin felt the settling of psychic miasma, that heaviness to the air that told him psychic energy was misplaced. Kitty at work, no doubt, since the annoyance on the women’s faces turned to empathy.
“Good luck, honey. Men suck. No offense,” one of them said as she passed him into the restroom.
“None taken. And thanks.” At the word suck, he couldn’t help thinking of Aidan again.
Kitty groaned and walked ahead of him. “Why is it whenever anyone says suck or blow, you guys always think with the wrong head? Too much libido. Ugh.” She smacked her forehead, and Gavin grinned.
But as they made their way to the bar and ordered another round of beer and chips, he couldn’t help worrying about what she’d said.
Finding someone to love, someone like Aidan, a tough Master who fit his needs, was a dream come true. Having that love slapped back in his face? A nightmare, because Gavin had no idea what loving Aidan might do to him.
Or why, for a smart guy, Gavin might have made the dumbest mistake of his life.
Chapter Six
Aidan spent the next two days schooling Gavin in the fine art of bondage and obedience. Nothing too rough or too strange. Just a lot of conditioning so that Gavin would respond as if he and Aidan had a real relationship. They hadn’t spent all their time fucking, unfortunately. They’d also reviewed everything they knew about Carl Kerr, his men, and their fake new identities. Jack had given them information that borrowed details from a few low-key badasses in the Northwest, enough to withstand intense scrutiny. But Aidan didn’t plan to stick around Kerr’s estate any longer than he had to. The operation had taken a strange turn into something he wasn’t sure he was comfortable with.
Gavin had taken to bondage like a cat to cream, and Aidan wanted to be more annoyed by the fact that the man’s tastes mirrored his own. They had similar likes and dislikes, and what they didn’t have in common complemented one another. Both hated chick flicks and loved adventure movies. Aidan was an ass man; Gavin liked a nice muscular chest and arms. And of course, both liked a nice cock—thus both were perfectly satisfied with each other’s bodies. Aidan liked to dominate, and Gavin loved to submit.
They both agreed that Jack needed to be handled with kid gloves, that James and Keegan were sexy but too annoying for anyone other than each other and Rory, and that Ian would in time get his ass handed to him, and not in a good way.
As Aidan looked in on his partner sleeping in their bed, he realized how much he liked having Gavin in his home—his sanctuary—and it scared him. Thoughts of permanence and a real relationship had no place in a mission workup, yet Aidan continued to tell himself they needed this kind of bone-deep trust to be convincing. He spoke the truth, but he also worried, because a larger part of him secretly hoped their connection might continue after the job wrapped up.
If he didn’t get them both killed because he couldn’t think past his lover.
God, so many times he’d had to stop himself from hugging or kissing Gavin better. Pushing Gavin past his limits was simultaneously rewarding and frightening. He learned more control himself because he didn’t want to hurt his sub. They’d spent the past twenty-four hours fully immersed in the lifestyle. Gavin no longer hesitated when Aidan told him what to do. The blue-eyed wonder boy had gotten himself off riding a dildo and pleasuring himself at Aidan’s command. Granted, he’d blushed while doing it, but he hadn’t questioned the order. He sucked like a dream, and it felt like his ass had been made with Aidan in mind.
Such a tight fucking fit. Aidan adjusted himself in his pajama pants, feeling like a moron for standing around with a woody when his boy could have relieved him. But that would mean giving in to his own desire, and he shouldn’t need Gavin this much. A good Master didn’t cave to anything. He held on to his discipline and didn’t let anger or petty desires sway him from seeing to his sub. Aidan’s sub needed rest. He’d been ridden hard, had come more than he had in months. Hell, a year, to hear Gavin tell it.
Or think it.
Though his boy could still maintain a psychic shield, the moment they touched, his ability to withstand Aidan’s telepathy went out the window. And since they’d been fucking a lot, they had constant contact. To his bewilderment, he felt a strange contentment just being around Gavin. When Gavin stroked him in those rare moments at rest, Aidan’s heart did funny things.
He experienced odd butterflies in his stomach, a racing pulse, dry mouth, nerves where he had never in his life been nervous—well, not since leaving home. An excited form of anticipation filled him when he looked into Gavin’s sky-blue eyes, and he had to suppress the joy while feeling like a moron. He was letting Gavin’s gooey emotions stir him to think impossible things.
Things Gavin might no longer think he felt after tomorrow. Aidan didn’t like it, but it had to be done. He couldn’t afford to feel this way. It might cost them their lives on this mission, and he knew for a fact that if he allowed himself to love Gavin, it would break Aidan’s heart when it ended. Men didn’t love Aidan. They lusted after him or wanted to be him—the man they thought they knew. No one wanted to know the real Aidan Marshall.
A small part of him whispered back, Gavin does. And that strange quiver of excitement hit him again. Because what if Gavin didn’t hate what they had to do, but wanted to experience all of it? What if he didn’t fly away when it was all over?
What then?
The following afternoon in his darkened basement, Aidan watched as Gavin studied Aidan’s buff, sexy friend Mike. Trepidation lit his boy’s eyes, and his body had yet to relax. Of course, the chains holding his wrists and ankles in place might have had something to do with his tension.
A sinking sensation had Aidan’s stomach roiling, but he held fast.
Gavin wore nothing but the smooth skin God had given him. No chest hair, all muscle and sinew, and a cock that wouldn’t quit. Even now, alarmed and no doubt embarrassed to be naked in front of a stranger, he was long and thick.