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A pink light came over the city and I cried with gratitude. Of course, that was where I wanted to be.

24 – REALITY CHECK

I chose the third day to do my music tour. Amy Winehouse and Beatles are from England and, obviously, this was one of the reasons I was in London.

After appreciating Camden Market’s crafts, I went for a beer at the pub where Amy used to get drunk with her friends. I also passed the house where she lived and walked a few more miles through the quiet streets of the city until I reached Abbey Road, the world’s most iconic crosswalk, perpetuated on the cover of the 12th Beatles album. I had no one to take the album photo with me, so I improvised a selfie by leaning the phone on the curb and using the self-timer.

On the fourth and last day, I visited St. Paul’s Cathedral and went to the Tower Bridge. Two Spanish guys offered to take a picture of me as I stopped by the river, a few feet from the bridge. One of them made conversation asking where I was from, how long I was traveling and if I was alone. We talked for a few minutes and he said they would end the day at a nearby pub. I thanked him, but my bus to Liverpool was leaving in a few hours.

After saying goodbye, I walked away and laughed at the awkward crush I felt for that Spanish man. Then it hit me like a truck. I realized I was traveling around the world and I was single. Do you know that bomb that explodes in your mind? Yeah. I laughed again, but now at myself.

It was obvious that I still didn’t realize the extent of my freedom. I could return the flirt if I wanted to without feeling guilty. I remembered Jordan and thanked him for the good times he had given me in Toronto, but finally, it was time to leave the past behind.

I had several months and several destinations ahead. Why not enjoy the possibilities life would offer me? Discovering that I was single in Europe gave me a different mood to continue the trip.

25 – ALL BUT A MEMORY

I arrived in little Liverpool at dawn and went straight to the hostel, where I fell asleep on the reception couch, because I didn’t want to pay for an extra night just to be able to check in 7 hours in advance. When the day dawned, I left my backpack there and went out for a walk and to look for some cheap food. I wanted some whole grain bread, omelet, fruit and cereal, but my budget wouldn’t allow me certain luxuries, especially when I was paying the bill in sterling. I thanked them for the croissant with black coffee and headed my way.

Liverpool is very small. I walked to the Anglican Cathedral, the largest one in Europe, but found the church closed. The whole city was decorated for the University of Liverpool graduation party, and some ceremonies were held in the two main churches, the Catholic and the Anglican.

I walked to the Catholic cathedral, intentionally built facing the Anglican one, but a few blocks away. I attended the end of a Commencement, not understanding a word of what the priest was saying, and then walked into the city center. I bought a salad for lunch and went to the hostel to check in.

When I left Cavern Club, I stopped at a bar to catch up on the last moments of Croatia and England match. Regardless of the outcome, the English would get wasted.

The next day, I met my Couchsurfing hostess in Queen Victoria’s square and went to my new accommodation. An almost unfurnished apartment in the heart of Liverpool, inhabited by two Polish students.

We had wine, talked about art, and shared videos and photos of our favorite artists. Paulina was an architecture student, but worked in a gallery.

I slept on a mattress in the living room, and the next day I made one of the worst pancakes I ever made to thank for the accommodation.

I left for the last day out in Liverpool and, reaching the Mersey River shores, home to the statues of the four Beatles, I remembered planning to get Liverpool on my road map. When I started traveling, I had no idea where I was going, but I had a few cities in mind and Liverpool was one of the places I’d definitely visit.

I felt so grateful that I couldn’t explain it. I asked a tourist to take some pictures of me among the sculptor Andy Edwards monument and then I sat on the floor, feeling all the excitement of that moment. “Everything passes by and this will be all but a memory soon.”

A chilly wind blew the leaves away, and I could smell popcorn coming from a trolley on Pier Head. This was the moment of a dream come true, and I wanted to remember all the emotions I was feeling. “Dream. Dream and act. Anything is possible,” I told myself.

26 – THE IRISH BLUE EYES

Exhausted but happy, I arrived at Dublin bus station around 7 am on a Saturday morning. I spent the night traveling on a huge ferry that crossed the Irish Sea. During the night, I exchanged some messages with my host on WhatsApp. He was already apologizing: “I’m in a pub and I’ll probably be still awake and drunk when you arrive.”

I said I understood that it was Friday night and that he, as a good Irish, was enjoying one of the hottest summers in European history.

Despite being drunk, he was very kind having me in his house. I’d sleep on the living room sofa, which was filthy, just like the rest of the place. I kept thinking that dirt could be something cultural and that, since hosting was free, I should accept it without complaining. I took a quick shower, trying not to touch the moldy shower stall, and lay down wrapped in the duvet, as he had given me no sheets or pillows.

I slept for about 3 hours and then went for a walk around the city. When I returned at night, he was still drunk and this time he had company. He and his friend were right on the couch that was supposed to be my bed. At the coffee table, I could see all kinds of drugs.

He didn’t hint at anything, but of course I felt insecure. I didn’t know how many kinds of drugs and how much alcohol he could’ve mixed by then and I started looking for a hostel right away. Noticing that I was apprehensive, he offered me the guest room he used to rent for Airbnb. I locked the door and decided to leave the next day.

Sunday dawned rainy and I, holding my backpack already, said goodbye to the host, who was watching TV in his underwear in the middle of the room. I stopped at a coffee shop and wondered about the possibilities I had. I sent emergency requests to other hosts on Couchsurfing and checked the prices and locations of available hostels. As it was raining, I spent a few hours waiting for someone from the platform to accept my request, but it was in vain. I went to the cheapest hostel I found near the city center.

I laid in bed right after having a shower and eating some ready-made salad I had bought at the grocery store. The room smelled of smelly feet and there was a gentleman in his underpants on the bed near the window. Nothing much different from the last Couchsurfing, I thought. But I felt much safer and was happy about it. I was so glad that I jumped right out of bed and decided to go out to celebrate.

I wore a denim shirt over my pajama top, put on some makeup on my eyes, and went for a walk alone and aimlessly. France had just won the Cup, but I remember seeing a lot of people wearing the defeated Croatia top in the crowded pubs. When I heard an excited crowd singing “Take me home, country roads,” I knew I had found my pub. I grabbed some cider and started singing along. It felt like a college party surrounded by old friends.

The band played John Denver once again, but at the height of the singing, the microphones were turned off. General frustration. The doors of my pub closed earlier than I expected and I found myself once again standing in front of Dublin’s most iconic place: the Temple Bar. I had already taken my picture on the flowered, lighted façade in the previous afternoon, but something invited me in again.