When had she become the bad guy? “I thought you guys were supposed to support me.”
Nell leaned toward her. “We are, sweetie. But we wouldn’t be very supportive if we let you make the biggest mistake of your life.”
Was it a mistake? How could she trust him again? And what else hadn’t he told her?
And did any of it matter? Or was she letting her past ruin her chances for a future?
“I can’t live that life again.” She said it more to herself than anyone else.
“I don’t want you to. I don’t want that life. That’s why I’m here.” Caleb stood in the doorway, his hands in the pockets of his jeans. His face was lined with care as though the last moments had aged him.
Alexei stood beside him.
How much had they both changed for her? What had it cost these possessive men to decide to share her?
“I’d like to know your story.” She said it simply, though it meant the world to her. If he wouldn’t talk to her, she wasn’t sure there was a chance.
He nodded, but no words came out.
“Could we be doing this alone? Ladies, I appreciate your love for Holly, but we need time alone.” Alexei opened the door.
Laura stared him down, never one to let a little thing like a six-foot-five-inch slab of muscle renowned for his former violent tendencies man intimidate her. “You better take care of her.”
“Laura, they will. That’s why they’re here.” Nell stood, looking perfectly happy with the outcome of the afternoon. She settled Paige on her hip. “Come on guys, let’s get Callie home. She’s going to bring another beautiful soul into the world any day now. We should make sure her house is ready. I want to bless the baby’s room and invite the goddess in.”
Rachel held a hand out to Callie. “Ugh, I hope you don’t mind some smelly herbs, Cal.”
She shook her head. “I don’t mind. But I’m pretty sure I’m never having this baby. I know it’s Zane’s because it’s so big. I think this baby weighs thirty pounds. He planted a giant inside me. And I swear this little sucker has more than four limbs.”
“Uhm, I can do another ultrasound.” Caleb put his hands on Callie’s belly. “How about tomorrow morning? You’re not due for another two weeks, but if the baby is big, we might need to schedule a C-section.”
“Oh, no, Callie,” Nell said. “Maybe we should call the shaman back in.”
“Nope,” Callie said. “If the Doc wants to split me open right now, I’m up for it. I’m done with being pregnant. And I will happily let you take another look at my boy.”
Rachel snorted as she lifted her baby from Nell. “Doc is a good man, but he’s not the greatest at reading a sonogram. Is he, baby girl? He thought you had a penis. You don’t have a penis. No, sir. Callie’s baby won’t have a penis, either. She’s going to be your best friend.”
“Now, we need to talk about this,” Nell said, her skirt fluttering around her ankles as she ran after the other women.
Laura gave Holly a long hug. “You just holler if they give you trouble. I think I’m going to have to save Nell. Rachel can get touchy about drugs and childbirth. We’re going to be over at Callie’s making casseroles to freeze so Zane doesn’t have to cook after the baby comes. Why don’t you come with us, Nicky? You can get to know your new aunts, and I think Rafe and Cam are going to be doing some yard work. We can pull up lawn chairs and whistle until they take off their shirts.”
“I think I’m going to love my new uncles,” Nicky said with a smile. He stopped in front of Caleb. “Talk fast, man. I’m pulling for you.”
The door closed behind them, and they were alone.
“Cheap lay?” Caleb asked, obviously ready to get to the fight. His face was tight.
She wasn’t about to let him make her the bad guy by throwing her words back in her face. “You’re the one who lied, Caleb.”
“I didn’t lie.” Caleb’s words were clipped, short, revealing his frustration. “I’ve gone by my mother’s maiden name for years. I didn’t like everything that came along with being a Sommerville, including the money. I like living simply. The only time my money has come in handy is when you needed things, like a roof. Which wasn’t cheap.”
She put a hand on her hip. “Oh, so now you’re owning up to that? I asked you before and you wouldn’t answer.”
Caleb scrubbed a hand through his short hair. “I didn’t want you to feel beholden. You think I didn’t look into your past? I knew who your ex-husband was. I knew what he did to you. I might not have known all the details, but I could make some great guesses. You obviously didn’t want to leave your son behind when you got divorced.”
“Of course I didn’t.”
“Your husband used his money and power to separate you from your son.” It wasn’t a question. Caleb said it with a familiar disgust, as though he’d seen it before.
Holly took a long breath. “Yes, he did. Actually he managed to come up with some damning photographs of me with his head security guard.”
“Bastard,” Caleb cursed. “What did he do? Hire someone who looked like you?”
She stilled. She hadn’t told him she wasn’t guilty. So why did he assume she was innocent? “Maybe he just followed me, Caleb.”
“Bullshit. You wouldn’t cheat. I know you. You wouldn’t cheat on him no matter how big an asshole he was. He was the father of your son. You took vows. You wouldn’t cheat.”
Tears pooled in her eyes. “How can you know that?”
“Dushka, he knows for same reason I know. He sees your soul. Why can you not see his?” Alexei stood by the door, his face grim. He watched the argument with dark eyes and a flat mouth.
It struck Holly that Alexei had as much to lose as either of them. Though he wasn’t a part of this argument, he was involved. He was part of this. She could yell at Caleb all she liked, but it wouldn’t help the three of them.
“Tell me why you wouldn’t tell me your name.”
Now it was Caleb’s turn to calm down. He paced a little. “Because after I found out about your ex-husband, I was afraid you wouldn’t like me. And I really wanted you to like me.”
“Why?” Holly asked.
The words burst from his mouth like a cork popping from a champagne bottle. “Because I loved you from the minute I saw you. I walked into the café and you smiled at me and I felt like the sun had come out after years of rain, and that scared the shit out of me. It still scares the shit out of me. It’s just I’ve figured out that something else scares me more. Losing you.”
She stood there in her tiny cabin—the very place where she’d been exiled—and realized that she could believe him or not. She could pull the mantle of past pain around her and be safe. She could go on as she had before. She could even keep Alexei. She didn’t need Caleb. Caleb would always have ties to a world she hated, a world that could come back to hurt her. Alexei would stay with her.
And they would all be living a half life because this weird thing between them worked. It was beautiful and odd and worth fighting for. And it was far past time to put her fear aside.
She didn’t speak. Words had always failed Caleb, but his actions spoke volumes. He’d taken care of her when she’d needed it. He was damaged, and she didn’t exactly know why. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter if he never healed. She would take him damaged and broken. She would try to heal his hurt.
She put her hands on his face. “I love you, Caleb Burke.”
Not Sommerville. Nicky was right. This was who Caleb wanted to be.
His green eyes were solemn as he looked at her. “I love you, too. I just don’t know that it means much.”
Holly put a finger to his lips. “You don’t have to tell me anything. I don’t need to know. I love the man you are now.”