“Next thing I remember was throwing up on the side of the road. They say I broke through the barrier, that it took two firemen and four cops to drag me away from her body. I don’t remember seeing her broken skull. Or the blood. Just her legs, orange shoes, and blue running shorts, from fifty yards back in my car.”
Sue leaned across the blanket and draped her arms around Donald’s neck.
Roger heard her whisper, “I’m so sorry,” but Donald didn’t return the embrace, just stared at him instead.
Sue pulled back, said, “Someone had hit her.”
“Yeah. But whoever did was gone by the time the police arrived.”
“No.”
“This occurred in a residential area, and in one of the nearby houses, someone had happened to look out a window, see a man standing in the street over my daughter. But he was gone when the police showed up.”
“A hit-and-run.”
“Yeah.”
“Oh my God. What about your wife? What—”
“We separated four years ago.”
Roger couldn’t look at him, turned instead to the summer moon, nearly full, and as large and white as he would ever see it, the Ocean of Storms clearly visible as a gray blemish two hundred thousand miles away.
Donald said, “Sometimes, I can talk about it without ripping the stitches, but not tonight, I guess. I better go.” He got to his feet, leaving the scotch and cards on the blanket, and walked off into the dark.
They were lying in their sleeping bags in the tent when Roger leaned over and whispered in Sue’s ear, “We have to leave right now.”
“I was almost asleep, Roge, what are you—”
“Just listen.” The whites of her eyes appeared in the dark. “I want you to quietly get dressed, put your boots on. We’ll leave everything here, just take our wallets and keys.”
“Why?”
“Donald’s planning to kill us tonight.”
Sue sat up in her sleeping bag and pushed her brown hair out of her face. “This isn’t funny, Roger. Not even a little—”
“Do I sound like I’m joking?”
“Why are you saying this? ‘Cause he walks around with a machete and was in Vietnam and…” Sue covered her mouth. “Oh, Roger, no. Oh God, please tell me…” Sue turned away from him and buried her face in her sleeping bag.
Roger lay beside her, whispering in her ear.
“I was late for a meeting downtown. I turned a corner on Oak Street and the coffee spilled between my legs, burned me. I swerved, and when I looked up…
“At first, I just sat stunned behind the wheel, like I could will the moment away, press undo on the keyboard. I got out and saw her on the pavement, half under the front bumper. I looked around. No other cars coming. No one else in the vicinity. Just a quiet Thursday morning, the trees turning, wet red leaves on the street. I thought about you, about Jennifer and Michelle, all the things that could be taken from me ‘cause of one stupid fucking lapse in concentration, and the next thing I knew I was on I-94.”
Sue was crying. “That’s why you sold the Lexus. Why you moved us to Eden Prairie. How’d you keep this from me, Roger? How did you—”
“Live with myself? I don’t know. I still don’t know.”
“Are you sure it’s him? That Donald’s the father of the girl you hit?”
“This thing happened in early October. Almost six years ago. In St. Paul.”
“But what if it’s just a horrible coin—”
“I still dream about the orange shoes and blue shorts, Sue.”
“Oh God, baby.” She turned over and pulled her husband down onto her chest, ran her fingernails across the back of his neck. “What do you think he’s gonna try to do to us?”
“I don’t know, but he didn’t come all this way, follow us up into the middle of nowhere just to talk.”
“So we just leave? Right now?”
“Yes.”
“Can you get us back to the trailhead in the dark?”
“I think so. If not, we’ll just hide somewhere until morning. What’s important is getting out of this tent and away from our camp as soon as possible.”
“But he must know where we live, Roger.” Sue sat up, faced her husband. “He was able to find out we were coming to North Carolina. What keeps him from doing this when we get back to Minnesota? Or from turning you in?”
“I don’t think this is about bringing me to justice in any legal sense of the word.”
“We can’t just run away, Roger.”
“Sure we can. And we will.”
“He might know where our girls live. Might decide to go after them. We have no idea what he’s capable of.”
“So what are we supposed—”
“You wanna be free of this?”
“Of course.”
“Have it never come back to haunt you as long as you live? Guarantee the safety of me and the girls? Your own freedom?”
For a moment, there was no sound but the weeds brushing against the exterior of the tent.
“Jesus, Sue. I don’t have that in me.”
“Well, you had it in you to leave a teenage girl dying in the street. Now if that man came into this wilderness to murder us, he probably went out of his way to make sure no one knew he was coming here, which works out perfectly for us.”
He heard his wife moving in the darkness, the separating teeth of a zipper.
The leather case dropped in his lap.
“You have to take the bullets out,” she whispered. “Wipe them down so they don’t have our prints. You probably won’t be able to find the shell casings in the dark.”
“Sue, I can’t.”
“You’re gonna make me handle this? Look, it breaks my heart that that man lost his daughter, and it makes me sick that it’s your fault, but I will not live the rest of my life in fear, looking over my shoulder, calling Jennifer and Michelle five times a day to make sure they’re okay. That morning, when you drove away, you decided you weren’t gonna let a mistake you made destroy our lives. Well, it’s too late to change course now.”
“I am telling you I can’t—”
“You don’t have a choice. This night’s been coming ever since that October morning. You started this six years ago. Now go finish it.”
He left Sue lying in the tall grass several hundred feet down the mountainside and headed back up toward the meadows of Beech Spring Gap carrying a flashlight he didn’t need under the blazing wattage of the moon.
He reached the gap, moved past their tent and along the trail that led to Shining Rock Mountain, the base of which stood cloaked in thickets of rhododendron that bloomed pink in the month of June.
On a walk that morning, a thousand years ago, he’d noticed a piece of red tucked back among the glossy green leaves, wondered now if that had been Donald’s tent, and how he would find the man’s camp in the middle of the night.
He walked off the trail and crouched down in the grass. Five yards ahead lay the edge of the rhododendron thicket. Roger thought he recalled that piece of red a hundred feet or so up the gentle slope, though he couldn’t be sure.
For a while, he lay on the ground, just listening.
The grass swayed, blades banging dryly against one another.
Rhododendron leaves scraped together.
Something scampered through the thicket.
This was his thirteenth summer coming to Shining Rock, and he found that most of their time here had vanished completely from memory—more impression than detail. But a few of their trips remained clear, intact.
The first time they’d come and accidentally discovered this place, the twins were only six years old, and Michelle had lost her front teeth to this gap while she and Jennifer wrestled and rolled in a meadow one sunny afternoon, cried her heart out, afraid the tooth fairy wouldn’t pay for lost teeth.