Chapter 6 – I Should Be Okay
Saturday June 7
DAD, GREG AND UNCLE John had stayed up and put a serious dent in a bottle of scotch. Uncle John had to take care of the cows, so he came staggering out.
“You look like shit,” I told him.
“Funny, I feel like shit. My brother tried to outdrink me. I’m a dumbass for trying to keep up.”
“If you give me the keys to the pickup, I’ll fill all the feed racks and take care of the grain feeders.”
He went and got the keys while I put on a pot of coffee. I loaded hay in the truck and bags of feed. Beau hopped in and was riding shotgun. Most farms feed at the barn and just call the cows in. I really didn’t understand why Uncle John had three different feed stations around the property. I found one of the automatic watering stations was stuck in the ‘on’ position, making a mess. The float had rubbed up against the side, so I adjusted it so it would shut off.
I came back to the house and parked the truck. I changed into my running shoes and jogged up the road. I needed to wrap my mind around this whole Alpha Male business. I set a brisk pace and dropped into my thinking zone. I’d read a lot of books that made it sound like being an Alpha Male was kind of magical. I knew the reality was much different.
Tami had already talked to me about being a ‘doer,’ as she called it. It was similar to what Uncle John described as a ‘seeking’ behavior. The simple fact was that even if my brain chemistry made me able to get things done, I still had to do them. I couldn’t let a label make me slack off.
Something that did concern me was the need for ‘novelty,’ as Uncle John called it. I found the experience with Greg and Beth had given me a charge. I had to be cautious or I’d turn into a hedonistic, pleasure-seeking bad boy. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.
The one insight that bothered me before was my need not to have another guy touch a girl I was interested in. In a way, that insight about testosterone let me off the hook. I’d been worried about the fairness of me being with multiple partners, but I expected fidelity from those same partners. At least now I understood the forces that drove me.
I found myself back at the farm. I hadn’t done my afternoon workout yesterday, so I did thirty minutes of hell in the front yard. When I was done, I lay down in the grass and tried to catch my breath. When I could finally sit up, I saw Greg, Dad and Uncle John seated on the porch, drinking coffee.
“I don’t know how he does it. I’d be slacking off if I was doing that on my own,” Greg said as he shook his head.
“He has a goal, and nothing’s going to stop him,” Uncle John told Greg. “He knows what the payoff is, and has figured out how to get there. Don’t be surprised when he becomes one of the best.”
“Go get a shower. I need to eat and there’s no food in the house,” Dad ordered me.
WE WENT TO THE ONLY game in town, the Coffee House. Grace needed to clean off a table so we could sit down. They were packed this morning. I realized that Grace no longer held any interest for me. Knowing that she was with another guy, who happened to be my uncle, put a damper on my desire.
Grace took our orders and I got up to use the bathroom. When I came out, she’d noticed and had waited for me.
“So, are you going to the dance tonight?”
“I don’t know, why?”
She looked hurt.
“Sorry, I just don’t know what the plans are for today. Dad and Uncle John haven’t told us what we’re doing, and I’ve just been going with the flow and enjoying the weekend,” I explained.
“I thought you might want to dance with me.”
I gave her a tight smile.
“If we go, I promise to save a dance for you,” I said, not wanting to commit to more.
Her dad yelled that she had an order up, and I was saved before the conversation got any more awkward. Uncle John eyed me when I got back to the table. I just ignored him.
UNCLE JOHN, BEING A (soon to be former) confirmed bachelor, had toys. One of his toys was a bass boat. It fished three comfortably. Four was tight quarters. The lake we were fishing had a nice beach. I told them I needed to work on my tan so the boat wouldn’t be crowded.
I guess the warm sand under the beach towel and a full stomach made me sleepy. I woke to a female voice telling me I needed to turn over. I opened one eye and saw a lady my mom’s age smiling at me.
“Thanks, I must’ve fallen asleep.”
“I’ll say, you snore like a freight train,” she teased me.
“I call bullshit. I don’t snore.”
Her eyebrow over one eye went up and she gave me the mom look.
“Bullshit, you say? Didn’t your momma teach you not to say bad words?”
“I think my momma would be fine with that,” I shot back with a grin.
Two girls came lugging a cooler. I jumped up and took it from them. They were obviously the daughters of the lady who made disparaging remarks about me. They both looked to be older than I was. They just stared at me as I carried the cooler over to where their mom had camped out. I went back and picked up my sunblock.
“Could one of you help me put some on my back so I don’t burn?”
I thought there was going to be a fight, but the older one stepped forward to help me out. I lay down on my towel. It seemed to take a long time to get the sunblock on.
“Darleen, I think he’s done,” her mom said.
I looked over my shoulder and smiled at the girl.
“Thanks, Darleen.”
She blushed and hurried back to her towel. The girls had a Bluetooth sound bar so they could play tunes from their phone. I was relaxing, listening to their songs when more girls showed up. It was obvious they had all planned to spend the day at the beach together. I overheard them checking me out.
“Dang, who’s that?”
“Darleen got to put suntan oil on him,” her sister said in an excited whisper.
I heard another car pull up and male voices.
“Who’s that?” a male voice said, and he sounded irritated.
I figured I’d better introduce myself. I stood up.
“I’m David Dawson, John Dawson’s nephew. I’m just here for the weekend,” I assured the boys.
The last statement seemed to relax them. I made a point of meeting everyone, and they gave me a Coke.
It was warming up, so we all got in the water. Someone wanted to play Marco Polo. I liked how they played. It was with a partner. Darleen claimed me and climbed onto my back with her legs wrapped around my waist and I felt her pert breasts push against my back. The water was still cool, so we didn’t last long. I was walking up the beach when Greg and the older generation arrived.
They docked the boat and we decided to go to the diner one town over for lunch. Uncle John claimed they had the best fried chicken. He was right, it was good. In the afternoon, we all went out on the boat. There wasn’t much fishing going on because they were kicking back and drinking beer. Dad and Uncle John were telling stories on each other. They had Greg and me in stitches. It surely met my definition of a ‘guys’ weekend.’
WHEN WE GOT BACK TO Uncle John’s farm, there was a message from Bonnie. We were invited to her house for dinner, and then we were going to the Moose Lodge to the dance. Mom had made us pack nice clothes. I suspect that she and Bonnie were in cahoots. We all had sports jackets and slacks. I was wearing a silk t-shirt. Greg and Dad were wearing dress shirts. Uncle John had on jeans and a nice polo shirt. I had a sneaking feeling we were going to be overdressed.
Bonnie lived in a small two-bedroom home in town. She had a nice deck in the back and she had the grill going. The guys all had a beer. Bonnie and I drank lemonade. I told her about the girls enjoying whiskey and lemonade in San Francisco. She passed, saying she was the designated driver tonight.