After the sweet-a berry tart, quite good-Brian said, "Marjorie, Victoria came to me with a very odd story."
"So? What was it?"
"My dear, please believe that I would not mention this were not Vickie so troubled by it." He paused.
I waited. "Upset by what, Brian?"
"She claims that you told her that you are a living artifact masquerading as a human being. I'm sorry but that's what she said."
"Yes, I told her that. Not in those words."
I did not add any explanation. Presently Brian said gently, "May I ask why?"
"Brian, Vickie was saying some very silly things about Tongans, and I was trying to make her see that they were both silly and wrong-that she was wronging Ellen by it. I am very much troubled about Ellen. The day I arrived home you shushed me about her, and I have kept quiet. But I can't keep quiet much longer. Brian, what are we going to do about Ellen? She's your daughter and mine; we can't ignore how she is being mistreated. What shall we do?"
"I do not necessarily agree that something should be done, Marjorie. Please don't change the subject. Vickie is quite unhappy. I am attempting to straighten out the misunderstanding."
I answered, "I have not changed the subject. Injustice to Ellen is the subject and I won't drop it. Is there any respect in which Ellen's husband is objectionable? Other than prejudgment against him because he is Tongan?"
"None that I know of. Although, in my opinion, it was inconsiderate of Ellen to marry a man who had not even been introduced to her family. It does not show a decent respect for the people who have loved her and cared for her all her life."
"Wait a moment, Brian. As Vickie tells it, Ellen asked to bring him home for inspection-as I was brought home-and Anita refused to permit it. Whereupon Ellen married him. True?"
"Well, yes. But Ellen was headstrong and hasty. I don't think she should have done so without talking to her other parents. I was quite hurt by it."
"Did she try to speak to you? Did you make any attempt to talk to her?"
"Marjorie, by the time I knew of it, it was a fait accompli."
"So I hear. Brian, ever since I got home I have been hoping that someone would explain to me what happened. According to Vickie none of this was ever settled in family council. Anita refused to let Ellen bring her beloved home. The rest of Ellen's parents either did not know or did not interfere with Anita's, uh, cruelty. Yes, cruelty. Whereupon the child got married. Whereupon Anita compounded her initial cruelty by a grave injustice: She refused Ellen her birthright, her share of the family's wealth. Is all this true?"
"Marjorie, you were not here. The rest of us-six out of seven- acted as wisely as we could in a difficult situation. I don't think it is proper of you to come along afterwards and criticize what we have done-upon my word, I don't."
"Dear, I don't mean to offend you. But my very point is that six of you have not done anything. Anita, acting alone, has done things that seem to me to be cruel and unjust... and the rest of you stood aside and let her get away with it. No family decisions, just Anita's decisions. If this is true, Brian-and correct me if I'm wrong-then I feel compelled to ask for a full executive session of all husbands and wives to correct this cruelty by inviting Ellen and her husband to visit home, and to correct the injustice by paying to Ellen her fair share of the family's wealth, or at least to acknowledge the debt if it can't be liquidated at once. Will you tell me your opinion of that?"
Brian drummed his nails on the tabletop. "Marjorie, that's a simplistic view of a complex situation. Will you admit that I love Ellen and have her welfare in mind quite as much as you do?"
"Certainly, darling!"
"Thank you. I agree with you that Anita should not have refused to let Ellen bring her young man home. Indeed, if Ellen had seen him against the background of her own home, with its gentle ways and its traditions, she might well have decided that he was not for her. Anita stampeded Ellen into a foolish marriage-and I have told her so. But the matter cannot be immediately corrected by inviting them here. You can see that. Let's agree that Anita should receive them warmly and graciously... but it's God's own truth that she won't-if she has them shoved down her throat."
He grinned at me and I was forced to grin in return. Anita can be charming... and she can be incredibly cold, rude, if it suits her.
Brian went on: "Instead, I'll have reason to make a trip to Tonga in a couple of weeks and this will let me get well acquainted without having Anita at my elbow-"
"Good! Take me along-pretty please?"
"It would annoy Anita."
"Brian, Anita has considerably more than annoyed me. I won't refrain from visiting Ellen on that account."
"Mmm... would you refrain from doing something that might damage the welfare of all of us?"
"If it were pointed out to me, yes. I might ask for explanation."
"You will have it. But let me deal with your second point. Of course Ellen will get every penny that is coming to her. But you will concede that there is no urgency about paying it to her. Hasty marriages often do not last long. And, while I have no proof of it, it is quite possible that Ellen has been taken in by a fortune hunter. Let's wait a bit and see how anxious this chap is to lay hands on her money. Isn't that prudent?"
I had to admit it. He continued: "Marjorie, my love, you are especially dear to me and to all of us because we see too little of you. It makes each of your trips home a fresh honeymoon for all of us. But, because you are away most of the time, you don't understand why the rest of us are always careful to keep Anita soothed down."
"Well- No, I don't. It should work both ways."
"In dealing with the law and with people I have found a vast difference between 'should' and 'is.' I've lived with Anita longest of any of us; I've learned to live with her little ways. What you may not realize is that she is the glue that holds the family together."
"How, Brian?"
"There is the obvious matter of her custodianship. As manager of the family finances and businesses she is well-nigh irreplaceable. Perhaps some other one of us could do it but it is certain that no one wants the job and I strongly suspect that no one of us could approach her competence. But in ways other than money she is a strong, capable executive. Whether it is in stopping quarrels between children or in deciding any of the thousand issues that come up in a large household, Anita can always make up her mind and keep things moving. A group family, such as ours, must have a strong, capable leader."
(Strong, capable tyrant, I said under my breath.)
"So. Marjie girl, can you wait a bit and give old Brian time to work it out? Believe that I love Ellen as much as you'do?"
I patted his hand. "Certainly, dear." (But don't take forever!)
"Now, when we get home, will you find Vickie and tell her that you were joking and that you are sorry you upset her? Please, dear."
(Wups! I had been thinking about Ellen so hard that I had forgotten where this conversation started.) "Now wait one moment, Brian. I'll wait and avoid annoying Anita since you tell me it's necessary. But I'm not going to cater to Vickie's racial prejudices."
"You would not be doing so. Our family is not all of one mind in such matters. I agree with you and you will find that Liz does, too. Vickie is somewhat on the fence; she wants to find any excuse to get Ellen back into the family and, now that I've talked to her, is willing to concede that Tongans are just like Maori and that the real test is the person himself. But it's that strange jest you made about yourself that has her upset."
"Oh. Brian, you once told me that you had almost earned a degree in biology when you switched to law."
"Yes. 'Almost' may be too strong."
"Then you know that an artificial person is biologically indistinguishable from an ordinary human being. The lack of a soul does not show."