CHAPTER13
They all stood in the doorway of the barn and looked at the wrecked float.
“So that’s what a float looks like, huh, Freddy?” asked Ziggy.
“It sure is a beauty,” said Si as he stared at the mess.
Meese cocked his head and stared at it. “I don’t know; it sort of looks how I feel all the time.”
Theodore stated firmly, “Curly, you keep a lookout. Wally, you and Ziggy clear away all the ripped-up material. Si, Meese, and Howie can start assembling materials that we can use. Freddy and I will put together some conceptual plans for what the actual end result will resemble.”
“Don’t you think you better draw a picture of what you want it to look like first?” asked Wally.
“THAT’S WHAT HE JUST SAID!” yelled Ziggy so loud they all jumped. Wally actually grabbed onto the barn rafters in his fright.
“Ziggy, keep it down,” said Freddy. “My dad might hear you. Or worse yet, my sister.”
“Sorry, Freddy,” said Ziggy in his normally tiny voice.
Wally dropped down from the rafters and said, “That’s okay, little psycho dude.”
“Okay, men – er, Fries – let’s get to work,” said Freddy.
Theodore and Freddy had drawn up blueprints on the wall of the barn, and the restoration of the float had begun. Freddy said, “I never liked the design my sister came up with anyway. We’re going to build it right this time.”
Wally had morphed himself into a lumber mill planing saw, and board after board of wood ran through Wally’s mouth as the purple Fry shaped it into usable pieces, but eating a couple of them along the way.
“Quality control,” he explained with a burp.
Acting as a crane, Curly lifted the boards up and into place on the float platform, where Ziggy, who showed a natural talent for hitting things, pounded nails into the boards so fast with his hammer hands they could barely keep him supplied with enough.
Si, Meese, and Howie sewed fabric together and made decorations to place on the float. Then they found some old cans of paint in one of the storage buildings. Wally swallowed it and then shot it back out of his mouth. In under twenty minutes the entire float was perfectly painted.
Theodore and Freddy had checked and re-checked the tractor engine, supports, and tires.
“Your father built a very impressive turbo-charged, air-cooled, electronic-ignition motor configuration,” said Theodore.
“Yeah, there’s no one better with gas flow than my dad,” said Freddy.
By early morning they all stepped back and looked at the float. It was far better than before. It was a thing of beauty, actually. It wasn’t a giant Vroom shake anymore; it was a miniature version of the Burger Castle that was actually hollow inside. Every detail was there, from the pickle turrets to the drawbridge and a painted yogurt moat. And on either side of the Burger Castle name were small fry figures.
Freddy ran his admiring gaze over it and then turned to his friends. “You guys really saved my butt. I don’t know how to thank you.”
“Food would be good,” answered Wally.
“That’s what friends do, Freddy,” said Theodore. “Help each other.”
“Yeah,” said Howie, and he slapped Freddy on the back.
“Oh, no!” Ziggy was pointing up to the ceiling.
They all looked up and saw Si and Meese floating there.
“How’d you get up there?” demanded Freddy.
When Si and Meese opened their mouths to answer, they fell to the floor of the barn.
All the others rushed over to them.
“What happened?” asked Howie.
Si explained, “We were seeing who could hold their breath the longest when we started floating up.”
“Hmm,” said Freddy. “Hold your breath again, guys.”
They did so and after five seconds they started to float up again.
“Now let out your breaths,” cried out Freddy.
When they did, Freddy smelled the air. “Helium!” he said. “I didn’t put that in when I designed you, but you are hollow. I know! When the lightning hit you, it must’ve caused a chemical reaction that makes your breath turn into helium when you hold it for longer than a few seconds. That actually might come in handy someday.”
“Cool, I can fly,” said Si.
“But I’m afraid of heights,” wailed Meese.
“Well,” said Freddy, “I think we need to call it a night.”
Howie hurried home while the Fries returned to the lab and Freddy went to his house and dropped into bed, exhausted.
Several hours later Nancy got up, went downstairs where her father was making breakfast, and said, “Dad, I didn’t want to have to tell you this.”
“Yes, Nanny-B, er, Nancy?”
“Our float for the Founders’ Day parade’s been destroyed.”
“What! I can’t believe it.”
“It’s true, Dad. Freddy did it. He’s snapped this time, he really has. It’s sad, very sad. Come on, I’ll show you.”
They raced to the barn and Nancy triumphantly threw open the door. “See?”
Alfred stared for a long moment and then exclaimed, “This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
Nancy hadn’t looked yet. “I know, it’s awful, isn’t it? I’ll be happy to accept his allowance while he’s in solitary confinement… what!” Nancy looked at the float in disbelief. “But it’s all changed. It’s… it’s the Burger Castle. Where’s the Vroom shake? Where’s the balcony where I’m going to deliver my Shakespeare monologues?”
Her father smiled. “You are quite the actress. You really did surprise me.”
“Uh, that’s right, Dad. You know how I love surprises. In fact, I’m going upstairs right now to surprise Freddy. I’m sure he’ll love it too.”
She stomped off to go find her brother and cream him.
After she left, Alfred saw the blueprints that Freddy and Theodore had drawn on the wall. He started rubbing his very sharp chin. “I wonder,” he said.
CHAPTER14
Howie Kapowie was walking home from the store later that day when he was ambushed by Adam Spanker and his gang. They dangled him upside down and stuffed grass in his nose. Adam balled his huge, lumpy fists in front of Howie’s upside-down face. “Tell me what you saw at Funky’s place, or else.”
“Nothing, I swear,” wailed Howie as he blew grass out of his nose.
Adam grabbed Howie by his shirt. “I know that goofball’s involved with all the crazy stuff that’s happened. And you know about it. Now talk!”
“I know nothing!” shouted Howie.
Adam rubbed his four chins and studied the situation. “If you don’t talk I’ll make you give me the answers to all the tests in school.”
“I already do!” said Howie.
“Oh yeah. Hmmm. I know. I’ll break your bike in half.”
“I don’t care!”
“You don’t?”
“No, because I don’t have a bike.”
“I’ll steal your cat then.”
“I’m allergic to them.”
“I’ll take your dog.”
“I’m allergic to slobber too.”
“I’ll smash your computer.”
“I use my dad’s.”
“I’ll break your glasses.”
“My mom’s an eye doctor. I get ’em by the dozen. And besides, I’m loyal to Freddy. Nothing you can threaten will break me.” Howie started to laugh crazily. “You don’t know who you’re dealing with. A Kapowie never gives in. Never!”
One of Adam’s bully friends whispered something to him. Adam started smiling. “Right. I’m glad I thought of that.” He turned to Howie. “All right, if you don’t talk, I’ll make sure that you never, ever get another cheese cube to eat so long as you live.”
“I’ll tell you everything,” said Howie Kapowie.