“We don’t have you a secret birthday present upstairs hiding under my bed wrapped in silver paper, Mummy,” declared Isabel, shaking her head.
Connor groaned at the little girl balanced on his arm.
“We don’t have an even bigger secret one hidden under yours and Daddy’s bed either.”
“Alright, Iz, you can stop now before that big vein in Mummy’s head bursts.”
“And we didn’t buy you a big, massive secret cake either.”
As Connor watched Jaxx’s face slowly become a disturbing shade of purple, he didn’t know whether to laugh or wince.
“And it’s not a secret chocolate cake, Mummy, I promise.”
Jaxxon raised a brow. “Chocolate?”
He nodded. “But if you don’t want the chocolate cake -”
“Let’s not be unreasonable,” said Jaxxon, “you’ve obviously gone to a lot of trouble getting me a cake so I don’t see why -” His tight, one-armed hug and firm kiss cut her off.
Isabel’s face scrunched up. “Yuck.”
“I love you, you mental bitch,” he whispered in Jaxx’s ear.
“And I love you, you dick,” she whispered back.
“Shall we sing ‘Happy Birthday’ then,” called out Lily as she brought out the huge cake lit with candles.
“No, no singing!” insisted Jaxxon. But they sang. Bloody sods.