Almost by a miracle the students left the lecture hall, peacefully, yet grumbling. But this was a problem for another day. First, he had to alert Norbert about the American plan to open up their own university.
Chapter 17
Marlene adapted to the grueling daily routine of working at the hospital, queuing up for rations, and running errands on top of attending classes and studying at home. In the first weeks, she’d fallen to bed exhausted every night, but slowly her body seemed to overcome the need for sleep and she could do mostly with a few hours a night. To everyone concerned about her health, she jokingly said, that she could sleep all she wanted once she was dead.
The main reason why she jumped out of her bed every morning with unmatched energy was the prospect of seeing Werner. She still didn’t admit to anyone – even herself – that she had feelings for him, but simply the hope of catching a fleeting glance at him in the university hallways made her entire body shiver with anticipation.
He seemed equally eager to see her, because he often happened to walk past the doors of her lecture hall at the precise moment when her class ended. Usually he wouldn’t say a word, but his charming smile always warmed her heart, despite knowing that it was wrong to fancy a convinced communist like him.
She’d been more or less indifferent to the Nazi propaganda at the beginning but had come to hate the oppression, brutality, distortion of facts and, most of all, the crippling hatred for anyone who was different, as the years passed.
Now she saw the Soviets for what they really were. They hadn’t come as the liberators they liked to call themselves, but as oppressors, and their ultimate goal was to install another totalitarian regime in Germany. She never believed the honeyed words of General Sokolov and his cronies who said one thing and then did another one.
One day she left civil law lecture together with her fellow student Lotte, a quick-witted redhead with a sharp tongue. The two of them had quickly become friends and spent plenty of time together to study and compare notes. Other students often commented that a pair of girls couldn’t be more different than the two of them.
Lotte was impulsive, driven, outspoken and assertive, where Marlene was composed, cautious, careful and kind. They even studied law for different reasons. Marlene wanted to help people, while Lotte wanted to fight for justice. But despite their differences they hit it off right away. Marlene liked the other girl for her inner strength to stand up for herself, but she also felt the need to care for her, because she often looked so sad.
“I gotta run, my sister is waiting for me. See you in the morning?” Lotte said and turned on her heel to rush off.
Nostalgia wound its way into Marlene’s heart. Both of her brothers were still in captivity. Kurt somewhere in France and Albert had been shipped to America. Her eyes to the ground she walked down the hallway, suddenly feeling lost, when she all but bumped into another person.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. Looking up she stared into Herr Böhm’s face and straightened her back. “Herr Böhm, please excuse me, I wasn’t paying attention.”
“Nothing to worry about. This is a pleasant surprise, actually.” He rubbed his clean-shaven chin, looking more like an insecure boy than one of the leading men in Berlin.
Marlene stood frozen in place. She didn’t move and they must have stood like this for an entire minute, while other students passed by until the lecture hall had emptied and they stood alone in the hallway.
Towering over her by almost one foot, he said, “Why don’t we have a cup of coffee in my office instead of standing in this drafty corridor, Fräulein Kupfer, since I’d like to make a proposal to you.”
A proposal ? Her head whirled and she barely managed to nod. Her feet automatically falling in step with him, she scolded herself for having completely inappropriate thoughts. He’d never even touched her apart from the formal kiss on her hand. How on earth did she dream about a white dress? She almost laughed out loud at the hilarity of her train of thought.
His secretary Frau Busch cast a questioning look at Marlene but didn’t say a word. She probably realized that keeping her job meant never to question her boss’s moves.
“Bring us two cups of coffee, please,” Herr Böhm said without further explanation and held his office door open for Marlene. He motioned for her to sit in front of his desk. The only other time she’d been in his office was during her admission interview, but then a guard and Professor Ebert had been present as well. Being alone with Herr Böhm in the same room unnerved her.
He walked over to one of the bookshelves overflowing with four-ring binders, folders and all kinds of books and she wondered what exactly he wanted from her. The tension raised her neck hair, and while listening with one ear to the noises Frau Busch made cooking coffee, Marlene scrutinized his office.
It was by far the nicest room in the entire building. Fresh white paint adorned the dilapidated walls and covered up the damaged plaster. The huge oak desk prominently stood in the middle of the room with a throne-like armchair for Böhm. She had heard of the intimidating experience of him staring down on the visitor who sat on a much smaller metal chair in front of the desk. Suddenly she felt small and vulnerable.
He walked over with a book in his hands at the same time as Frau Busch entered the office with two cups of coffee – real coffee – on a tray.
“Thank you, Frau Busch, you may leave for today,” Böhm dismissed his secretary without further explanation. When she closed the door, Böhm handed Marlene one cup and instead of retreating behind his monumental desk to stare down on her, he leaned against it and smiled. “Do you take sugar?”
“Sugar?” Marlene shrugged. What kind of question was this? Where she was concerned, sugar had long ago ceased to exist.
“In your coffee?” His lips tipped into a smile and Marlene observed with amazement how the color of his eyes changed from a cold gray to a most inviting warm green.
“Yes, please.”
He took the cup from her, added a spoonful of sugar, stirred it and handed it back to her. “Now, please taste.”
She took a sip, her brain not quite comprehending what was happening, except for the fuzzy warm feeling spreading through her body. Her taste buds exploded with the bittersweet aroma filling her mouth and she all but moaned, “Delicious.” How wonderful it would be to take such luxuries for granted as she once did all those many years ago.
His smile increased, as did the butterflies in her stomach. Marlene couldn’t help thinking that maybe Bruni was right and encouraging the handsome, well-groomed, charming, intelligent, and likeable man wasn’t a bad thing. Why did she want to miss out on the way he made her feel, just because she hated the Soviets? What did politics have to do with feelings?
“I’ve been wanting to give you this book,” Böhm suddenly said with his deep well-modulated voice. “It was one of my favorites at grammar school.”
Marlene looked at a worn-out copy of Anna Segher’s novel Aufstand der Fischer von Santa Barbara, Revolt of the Fishermen of Santa Barbara, and gasped. She remembered all too well the event when students of the same university she attended now had burned thousands of books banned by the Nazis, Anna Segher’s novel one of them.
“There’s nothing to be afraid of. Hitler is gone and with him the time of tyranny and fear. Please, I want you to read it. It will help you understand how the revolution of the working class will finally lead to prosperity and happiness for all.” He pressed the book into her hands.