"Well, decapitations aren't as easy as they seem," she said in her matter-of-fact way. I'd never thought they were easy at all, but her tone suggested that she believed everyone thought they were cake. "You've got to get through the spinal cord and tendons."
Through the bond, I felt Lissa grow queasy. She wasn't one for gruesome talk.
Mason's eyes lit up. "What's the best weapon to do it with?"
My mother considered. "An axe. You can get more weight behind it." She made a swinging motion by way of illustration.
"Cool," he said. "Man, I hope they let me carry an axe." It was a comical and ludicrous idea, since axes were hardly convenient weapons to carry around. For half a second, the thought of Mason walking down the street with an axe over his shoulder lightened my mood a little. The moment quickly passed.
I honestly couldn't believe we were having this conversation on Christmas. Her presence had soured everything. Fortunately, the gathering eventually dispersed. Christian and Lissa went off to do their own thing, and Dimitri and Tasha apparently had more catching up to do. Mason and I were well on our way to the dhampir dorm when my mother joined us.
None of us said anything. Stars cluttered the black sky, sharp and bright, their glitter matched in the ice and snow around us. I wore my ivory parka with fake fur trimming. It did a good job keeping my body warm, even though it did nothing against the chilly gusts that seared my face. The whole time we walked, I kept expecting my mother to turn off toward the other guardian areas, but she came right inside the dorm with us.
"I've been wanting to talk to you," she finally said. My alarms clicked on. What had I done now?
That was all she said, but Mason picked up on the hint immediately. He was neither stupid nor oblivious to social cues, though at that moment, I kind of wished he was. I also found it ironic that he wanted to fight every Strigoi in the world but was afraid of my mother.
He glanced at me apologetically, shrugged, and said, "Hey, I've got to get, um, somewhere. I'll see you later."
I watched with regret as he left, wishing I could run after him. Probably my mom would only tackle me and punch my other eye if I tried to escape. Better to do things her way and get this over with. Shifting uncomfortably, I looked everywhere but at her and waited for her to speak. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a few people glancing over at us. Recalling how everyone in the world seemed to know about her giving me the black eye, I suddenly decided I didn't want witnesses around for whatever lecture she was about to unleash on me.
"You want to, um, go to my room?" I asked.
She looked surprised, almost uncertain. "Sure."
I led her upstairs, keeping a safe distance away as we walked. Awkward tension built between us. She didn't say anything when we reached my room, but I saw her examine every detail carefully, as though a Strigoi might be lurking in there. I sat on the bed and waited while she paced, unsure what I should do. She ran her fingers over a stack of books on animal behavior and evolution.
"Are these for a report?" she asked.
"No. I'm just interested in it, that's all."
Her eyebrows rose. She hadn't known that. But how would she? She didn't know anything about me. She continued her appraisal, stopping to study little things that apparently surprised her about me. A picture of Lissa and me dressed up like fairies for Halloween. A bag of SweeTarts. It was as though my mother were meeting me for the first time.
Abruptly, she turned and extended her hand toward me. "Here."
Startled, I leaned forward and held my palm out underneath hers. Something small and cool dropped into my hand. It was a round pendant, a small one-not much bigger than a dime in diameter. A base of silver held a flat disc of colored glass circles. Frowning, I ran my thumb over its surface. It was strange, but the circles almost made it look like an eye. The inner one was small, just like a pupil. It was so dark blue that it looked black. Surrounding it was a larger circle of pale blue, which was in turn surrounded by a circle of white. A very, very thin ring of that dark blue color circled the outside.
"Thanks," I said. I hadn't expected anything from her. The gift was weird-why the hell would she give me an eye? — but it was a gift. "I… I didn't get you anything."
My mom nodded, face blank and unconcerned once more. "It's fine. I don't need anything."
She turned away again and started walking around the room. She didn't have a lot of space to do it, but her shorter height gave her a smaller stride. Each time she passed in front of the window over my bed, the light would catch her auburn hair and light it up. I watched her curiously and realized she was as nervous as me.
She halted in her pacing and glanced back toward me. "How's your eye?"
"Getting better."
"Good." She opened her mouth, and I had a feeling she was on the verge of apologizing. But she didn't.
When she started pacing again, I decided I couldn't stand the inactivity. I began putting my presents away. I'd gotten a pretty nice haul of stuff this morning. One of them was a silk dress from Tasha, red and embroidered with flowers. My mother watched me hang it in the room's tiny closet.
"That was very nice of Tasha."
"Yeah," I agreed. "I didn't know she was going to get me anything. I really like her."
"Me too."
I turned from the closet in surprise and stared at my mom. Her astonishment mirrored mine. If I hadn't known any better, I'd have said we'd just agreed on something. Maybe Christmas miracles did happen.
"Guardian Belikov will be a good match for her."
"I-" I blinked, not entirely sure what she was talking about. "Dimitri?"
"Guardian Belikov," she corrected sternly, still not approving of my casual way of addressing him.
"What… what kind of match?" I asked.
She raised an eyebrow. "You haven't heard? She's asked him to be her guardian-since she doesn't have one."
I felt like I'd been punched again. "But he's…assigned here. And to Lissa."
"Arrangements can be made. And regardless of the Ozera reputation…she's still royal. If she pushes, she can get her way."
I stared bleakly into space. "Well, I guess they are friends and everything."
"More than that-or possibly could be."
Bam! Punched again.
"What?"
"Hmm? Oh. She's… interested in him." By my mother's tone, it was clear that romantic matters actually held no interest for her. "She's willing to have dhampir children, so it's possible they might eventually make an, um, arrangement if he were her guardian."
Oh. My. God.
Time froze.
My heart stopped beating.
I realized my mother was waiting for a response. She was leaning against my desk, watching me. She might be able to hunt down Strigoi, but she was oblivious to my feelings.
"Is … is he going to do it? Be her guardian?" I asked weakly.
My mom shrugged. "I don't think he's agreed to it yet, but of course he will. It's a great opportunity."
"Of course," I echoed. Why would Dimitri turn down the chance to be a guardian to a friend of his and to have a baby?
I think my mom said something else after that, but I didn't hear it. I didn't hear anything. I kept thinking about Dimitri leaving the Academy, leaving me. I thought about the way he and Tasha had gotten along with each other so well. And then, after those recollections, my imagination started improvising future scenarios. Tasha and Dimitri together. Touching. Kissing. Naked. Other things …
I squeezed my eyes shut for half a second and then opened them.
"I'm really tired."