“So who’s the mystery man? Anyone I know?”
“Well, actually…”
She looks up as Rhett walks over with a glass of orange juice in his hand. He sets it down on the table and slips his arm around her waist.
“You told her then?”
“You’re… the father?”
“Is it that hard to believe?”
“No, no, of course not. It’s just… taken me a bit by surprise, that’s all!”
I leave them to it and go and find Deacon, who’s using the computer in his study.
The desk is stacked precariously high with papers and legal books.
You really tried to get me out, didn’t you?
“Ah, I take it they’ve told you their news?”
“You knew about this? Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Kate wanted to tell you herself – in person. Not in some manky visitor’s room. Aren’t you happy for them?”
“Of course I am – I just… didn’t see it coming, that’s all.”
“You didn’t?” He laughs. “Rhett’s had a thing for Kate ever since I can remember. The only thing I’m surprised about is that it’s taken them this long to get together.”
So that’s why I’ve never seen him with another girl! Poor Rhett. He must have been devastated when she married Julio.
He looks at me closely. “You thought he was on the other bus didn’t you?”
“Well, what was I supposed to think? He is rather fond of shopping. And cooking.” I pause, thoughtfully. “Perfect boyfriend material, really. But I just can’t believe he’s liked her for all these years! How could she not notice?”
“People can be a bit blind, when it comes to love.”
“Like you and Alicia?” I blush – I hadn’t meant to utter these words aloud.
“No.”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Are you still in love with her? Even after everything she’s done to me?
“No, I meant – that’s not what happened,”
“What did happen?” I try to keep my tone casual, but every nerve in my body jangles.
“I wanted to make you jealous.”
“Yeah, right.”
“I know it was stupid, but you always looked at me as your friend. And I wanted to be more than that.”
I blink. “Why didn’t you say something?”
“I did! Don’t you remember? At the ball, the Christmas before last.”
I look down at the ground. “I thought you were joking. We’d both had a bit too much to drink that night.”
“That’s the trouble. You never took me seriously.”
He hangs his head. “And the thing with Alicia – that was her idea. She said if you saw me with someone else, you might realise what you were missing. I know it was stupid and juvenile, but I thought it might just work. I didn’t know what she was then, or I would never have gone along with it.”
“So you were never… in love with her?”
“No, never. I only have eyes for you, Isabel.”
I melt into him.
The first kiss is soft and sweet and tender. Soon his hands are on my back and in my hair. His body presses against mine as he kisses me more deeply, more urgently. I’m tempted, oh how I’m tempted. But how can I even consider this? His cruel words, spoken so many months ago, still sting in my ears: “Fluffy’s disappearance is probably her own doing.”
“No!” I pull back sharply.
He looks at me in confusion.
“Isabel? What’s wrong?”
“I was there that night, when you were talking to Kate about me. When you told her Fluffy ran away because of me.”
“Ohhh…” Deacon’s face changes. “No, Isabel – it wasn’t like that.”
“I heard everything.”
I look at him expectantly, waiting for him to deny it, to apologise, anything.
“I know that’s what I said…”
So it’s true.
I spin on my heel.
“Isabel!”
“Leave me alone, Deacon. I really appreciate everything you’ve done for me, but there’s really nothing more you can say.”
I do a lot of thinking on the long walk home. It’s strange, picking my way through the familiar streets. This is the first time I’ve been on my own, truly on my own, for months. As much as it hurts, I have to accept this. If Deacon doesn’t believe in me, then there’s no future for us and no point in pretending.
My wind battered car waits for me on my driveway, the windows muddied with leaves and cobwebs. I find the front door slightly dented. The police must have broken it down to get in when they were looking for Holly. It’s been fixed, but you can still tell something happened here.
Inside, the place is a lot tidier than I left it. Kate and Rhett have been round to clean. There are fresh flowers on the windowsill and not a single dish left in the sink or on the draining board. Even Fluffy’s bowl has been washed and neatly put away. I sniff the air. Rhett has put in one of those plug-in air fresheners. It smells lovely and lemony, and yet it makes me feel incredibly sad, as if the citrus smell has wiped out the last vestige of Fluffy. I take his bowl out of the cupboard, fill it with water and place it back on the ground. Then I go upstairs to pack. If I set off now, I should be in Scotland by the morning.
Chapter Twenty-Six
The gentle motion of the train must have lulled me to sleep. I slide open the window and enjoy the cool breeze on my face, as sheep patterned fields whiz by. Am I really here, hundreds of miles away from Alicia, Jody and all the craziness of the last year?
As the train pulls into the station, I glance furtively around but no one takes the slightest bit of notice as I set off into the picturesque Fenley village. I don’t know how long the police will detain Alicia, but I’m betting it won’t be long. That’s why I had to get away when I did. It’s best for everyone that they don’t know where I am. I try not to think of the friends I’ve left behind. I try not to think of Deacon and my unresolved feelings for him. If my friends can’t find me, then nor can my enemies.
I walk into the village shop and linger in front of the display of cigarettes at the counter. I had to cut back on them while I was in prison, but now they are freely available, I’m not sure I really want them anymore. Instead, I fill a basket with groceries; bread, butter, eggs, milk, cheese, wine, coffee and chocolate – everything I need to sustain myself for the next few days plus a bottle of water for the long walk up the hill. And I know it’s a long walk, because I’ve been here before.
My friends and I rented Tumbledown Cottage last summer, after Kate and Julio broke up. We thought it would help Kate take her mind off things. I’m hoping it will do the same for me now. Quaint, scenic and secluded – it’s the perfect place to hide.
The cottage is just as I remember; that faint smell of oak and heather, low ceilings supported by solid black beams, walls painted in various shades of peach, lemon and pistachio. Despite the short notice, Marjorie, the owner, has left me a homemade Victoria sponge and turned up the heating, so the cottage is warm and snug when I arrive. There is no need for me to light the open fireplace – not that I had any intention of doing so.
I take a long, hot soak in the bath and change into my pyjamas. I am tempted to open a bottle of wine, but then what would I do tonight? Instead, I brew some coffee and flip through a magazine, marvelling at how the fashions have changed since I’ve been inside. My eyelids grow heavy and I allow myself to fall asleep in front of the TV. I am faintly aware it’s still on as I’m drifting off, but I do not make any move to turn it off. I have become too accustomed to noise.