Minutes go by. Neither of us says anything. Neither of us moves.
‘Do you know the Camarasaurus weighs twenty-five tons?’ asks Darren.
‘Yes,’ I say carefully, and then add, ‘It’s a plant eater, so I suggest the grapefruit diet.’ It’s a weak joke but Darren’s face hints at a smile. He takes my arm and starts to lead me through the galleries. His fingers singe.
‘So you’ve seen the dinosaur exhibition?’
‘Yes.’ I’m shaking.
‘Have you seen the blue whale?’
‘Yes.’
‘So you’ve seen enough of the Natural History Museum for one day?’ I feel as though I’m behind a number of veils but as he asks each question a veil drops and instead of feeling exposed, I feel more confident. I can see more clearly.
‘Yes.’
‘Do you think you’d like to go for a beer?’
This time I nod. I’m incapable of finding my voice. We leave the museum and go out into the London sun. We stop on the steps of the museum and squint at the brightness and crowds. Darren turns to me.
‘Do you still believe in me, Cas?’ he asks. His voice is patchy with emotion but it is still velvety and I recognize possibility and opportunity glimmering there.
‘Yes.’
‘Will you give me another chance?’
‘Yes. I will. A huge, fat, full YES.’
I’m home.
Thank You
Jonny Geller, my agent, a unique blend of panache and sincerity. Louise Moore, more than just Editor of the Year to me. I feel extremely fortunate and honoured that you are both in my life.
My family, who have constantly and tirelessly spread the word. For the record, neither my sister nor her children are on commission, although I’m sure their friends think differently.
My friends, who have been enthusiastic and interested. You know who you are and how grateful I am.
Acknowledgements
People assume writing and producing a book is a one (wo)man show. It’s anything but. I’d like to take this opportunity to thank all those involved in the success of Playing Away and those who currently have their fingers and toes crossed for the success of Game Over.
Especially Harrie Evans, John Bond, Tom Weldon, Nicky Stonehill, Peter Bowron and his entire sales team at Penguin. Everyone who ever sold a copy, everyone who ever bought one. I know none of this would have been possible without you.
Thank you to the people at Granada Media who gave up their time to talk to me, even though they are impossibly busy and work on a far tighter ship than TV6: John Creedon, Sally Blackburn, Martin Lowde, Ian Johnson, Bob Massie, Marina Webster and Keith Bryan.
Everyone remembers a good teacher; I’d like to formally thank a few of those who gave me challenges and chances and helped me become what I am (for better or worse!): Mrs Gunn (Durham Lane Primary School); Mr David Oliver, Mr John Beddow and Ms Margaret Maguire (Egglescliffe Comprehensive School); Professor Martin Stannard, Professor Sandy Cunningham and Professor Lois Potter (Leicester University).
Game Over and Playing Away are unlikely tributes to Colin Douglas, Mary Peacock, Dick Parks, Moyra Wilkinson and Emma Blythe, with love.