'Are you going to sit there all night?' he said irritably. 'Do I have to do everything for you?'
Ullii reacted as if he had slapped her across the face. Her eyes screwed shut; then she cried out, hunching over and covering her face with her arms. She began rocking back and forth, mewling.
'Oh, Ullii, I'm sorry,' he whispered, careful not to alarm her further. After all, she had not asked to come. At his every step she twitched, much as he had done when the whip had been laid across his back months ago.
She hid her face. 'Don't beat me!' she said in the monotone of one who expects to be ignored.
'Of course I'm not going to beat you, Ullii. Have I ever hurt you?'
She did not answer. He rubbed one hand through his hair and slipped it under her nose. She went still as his forearm touched hers. Neither moved. Ullii gave a gentle sniff. Parting her forearms, she sniffed deeply. She sighed and he could feel the tension flowing out of her.
'I'm so afraid, Nish.' She spoke so softly he could barely hear her.
'Of me?'
'Not you.' Her hands pulled his palm against her nose.
'Then what?'
'I can see horrible things.'
'Is Tiaan one of them?'
'Tiaan is nice. I like her. But in the mountain… It's too much, Nish. Everything is so bright, I can't even see her crystal. There's some great…'
'Magic?'
'Some great magic there. It's not made yet, but already it's blinding me. It's awful. It's going to eat us, Nish.'
'Is it lyrinx?'
'I can't tell. There's too much light. Everywhere I look it's as bright as the sun. It hurts my mind. I can't shut it out.'
'Can you see anything else?'
She turned around, facing west. 'Nothing.' She rotated south and east, the way they had come. 'Nothing!' Ullii kept turning, and as she turned due east she cried, 'Clawers!' pointing up along the line of the mountains.
'What, flying? Or in the mountains?'
'I don't know. The Art is too strong.'
'Surely they are flying,' said Nish, 'otherwise they would not need to use the Art.'
She turned east-south-east, screamed and doubled over, protecting her face again. 'No!' She let out an ungodly shriek and began to rock furiously. The shriek came echoing back at them.
'Ullii? What is it?'
It took ages to coax her back this time. 'It… it's a black knot in my lattice. There's a pattern, a beautiful pattern, but I know if I tried to unravel it there's a monster hiding inside. Waiting to get me. It hates us.'
'Is it lyrinx?'
'No. It hates clawers too. It's a creeping, poisonous thing.' Her eyes sprang open. He saw himself reflected in them. 'It's hunting Tiaan!'
'Perhaps it's hunting her for the lyrinx.'
'No!' she shuddered and began rubbing her shoulder. The delicate skin was raised in red welts.
Nish went to his pack, found a flask of cooking oil and sat down beside her, lubricating his fingers. He slid his fingertips across the welts.
She stiffened, but the tension went out of her when his fingers slipped across the skin. 'That feels… nice.' Ullii slid off her perch onto the ground in front of him.
He worked the oil back and forth, ever so gently. The evening was cold but it did not seem to bother her. Finally, when all the marks were done, he let his hand slip away. He ached for her but was afraid to do anything.
'Don't stop!' she whispered. 'Oh, Nish, no one has ever touched me so gently. All my life people have hurt me. No one ever touched me but to cause me pain. Everyone wants to use me, except you. You are the kindest man in the world, Nish.'
If only you knew! Pouring oil into his palm, he smoothed it across her shoulders and down her back. Ullii sighed, and as he worked his fingers back and forth she began to talk about herself, as she had never done before.
'All my life I've wanted to be like other people. You can't imagine what it's like to grow up and never be touched, because you can't bear it. My brothers and sisters used to hug each other. My mother and father too. I wanted it so badly, but the feel of their clothes made me scream. My clothes did too. I screamed all the time and no one knew why.'
'Was it always like that?' He shaped her sides with his palms.
'It got really bad when I was two. After I lost my twin.'
'You had a twin sister?'
'No, I had a brother. I think he died. No one would ever tell me. I still miss him.' She gave a great shudder. 'Before that I don't remember. People have hard skin; their hands hurt me.'
He pulled up his sleeve, touching her with the soft skin on the inside of his arm.
She drew it across her cheek, wonderingly. 'You feel nice, Nish.'
'If I took my shirt off,' he said experimentally, 'you would see that underneath I have soft skin, just like yours.'
She did not respond, so he unfastened his shirt, laid it aside and pressed his chest against her back, very carefully. His fingers slid up to her ears.
She jerked away. 'Don't touch my ears,' she said sharply.
He pulled away, deflated.
She turned to see what the matter was. 'It makes a noise in my head like thunder, Nish.' She put his hands back on her shoulders.
He resumed, shortly feeling bold enough to run his fingers down her throat and onto her chest. When she did not react, he slid them all the way to the swell of her breast, and away again. She sighed and rubbed her cheek against his upper arm.
Nish circled her breast with a slippery finger, heading inwards. She sighed again. He continued, in and in, tracing the little bumps and up the peak of the nipple. Ullii sucked in her breath sharply and began to breathe very fast. She gasped. Her head drooped.
'That is… very nice,' she murmured.
At last he was getting somewhere. Nish lifted his finger. Her hand came up and put it back, pressing down hard. He took the nipple between finger and thumb, rolling it gently back and forth.
Then in an instant she had flung him backwards off the rock. She leapt to her feet.
'What have I done?' he cried.
She stood up on tiptoe, head forward, owl eyes searching the darkness. 'It's happening.'
'What, Ullii?' He rubbed the back of his head, which he had cracked on a stone.
'I don't know. It's like all the lights in the city went on at the same time, right in my eyes.' She turned until she faced the towering bulk of Tirthrax. 'It's coming from up there. Inside the mountain!'
F IFTY -N INE
Tiaan woke early in the night, aching for her lover. She had tried to contact him before going to bed but had failed. This time it had felt different, as if he was not there at all. As if he no longer existed.
You're just being silly, she told herself. He's too busy, or gone some place where you can't contact him, just as the amplimet only works near nodes. But he'd said to call when the device was tested. He would not have gone away at such a critical time. And that meant…
There was no possibility of going back to sleep so she rose quietly and went to the work chamber. The place seemed different now. Tiaan did not understand why until she'd gone out again and the light-glasses faded. The glass doughnuts were glowing. In the darkness they had a faint, unearthly shimmer.
She touched the wall lights to keep them off, closed the door and stood in the dark, staring at her contraption. It looked alive, ready to be used. The last step was to put the amplimet into it and call again. Hours mattered now – Minis had emphasised that.
She unwrapped the amplimet, which was glowing too brightly to look at, and carried it towards the zyxibule. Tiaan could feel rampant energy in the room. Her hair stirred; her clothes crackled and gave off little flashing discharges.
When she was still a few steps away, something went click-thunk inside the machine and the light drained out of the amplimet. The doughnuts flared. A low hum began and Tiaan felt a wave pass through her. For an instant the walls and ceiling seemed to curve inwards. She blinked and all was normal again, though the hum remained. The zyxibule had activated itself. What would happen when she put the amplimet inside?