“Yes, sir!” the cadets yelled.
“Holy fucking moron crap!” Kim yelled. “Did you taint flakes just call me sir? Are you all retarded in ways that had yet to be invented until this very second? Have you never watched a training video in your life? Did you not all just complete your written exams administered by Central Space Command’s most dedicated recruitment officers? My name is Master Sergeant Lawrence Kim! You will call me Master Sergeant or you will get my ten foot cock up your ass so fast that I’ll be coming from between your gums before you can even register the intense tearing sensation that is your insides! Now, what is my motherfucking name?”
“Master Sergeant Lawrence Kim!” the cadets yelled.
“Jesus jumping on a laser! You are the stupidest motherfuckers I have ever had to train! Did I not just tell you sperm shits to call me Master Sergeant? Did I not just say that?” Kim roared.
He stomped up to a skinny young man, maybe twenty, maybe less, and thrust his chest against the cadet.
“What the fuck is your name, cadet?”
“Cadet Private Carlos DeSuezo!” the young man replied.
“What did I ask to be called, Cadet Private DeSuezo?”
“Master Sergeant!”
“Did you call me that?”
“I did not, Master Sergeant!”
“And why the holy fuck did you not call me by the name I just ordered all of you cunt scrapings to call me by?”
“It was confusing, Master Sergeant!”
“Do you know the difference between a pussy and an asshole, Cadet Private DeSuezo?”
“I do, Master Sergeant!”
“Which do you prefer to ram your itsy bitsy cock into, Cadet Private DeSuezo?”
“I prefer pussy, Master Sergeant!”
“Then would you not be upset if you were to whip out that one inch of yours and find that you are jamming it into a shit-crusted asshole? Would that not upset you, Cadet Private DeSuezo?”
“Yes, that would upset me, Master Sergeant!”
“Then you can understand how I felt when you piss dribbles referred to me by something other than Master Sergeant, can you not Cadet Private DeSuezo?”
“I can, Master Sergeant!”
“So let us try this again, you fucking snot licking, spooge drinkers! What is my name?”
“Master Sergeant!”
“I cannot hear you over the cocks and twats that are jammed in your mouths! WHAT THE FUCK IS MY NAME?”
“MASTER SERGEANT!”
“Very good,” Kim grinned. “That’s exactly what my name is. Now, your job, if your tiny little fucksticks for brains can handle it, is to name your scorcher. Can you handle that, you sphincter nibblers?”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
Kim turned and stalked over to a tall woman, close to thirty with shoulder-length brown hair and deep black skin. He shoved himself against her, mashing his muscled chest into her breasts. The woman did not budge, but her bottom lip started to quiver.
“What is the name of your scorcher, cadet private?”
“Master Sergeant?” the woman asked.
“You named your scorcher after me? I would be flattered if it wasn’t so goddamned sad! There are a trillion names out there and you have chosen to name your scorcher after me? Were you born an abortion, cadet private?”
“No, Master Sergeant!”
“Then why did you name your scorcher after me?”
“I did not, Master Sergeant! I was asking a question!”
“I did not hear a question, cadet private, I heard my motherfucking name! Why is your head shoved up your cunt, cadet private? Now, that’s a question!”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
“Yes? Yes what, you cum dumpster? At no point did I expect a response from that cock hole you speak with! What is your name, cadet private?”
“Cadet Private Nola Vklogg!”
“Cadet Private Nola Vklogg? You are not from Earth, Cadet Private Nola Vklogg, are you?”
“No, Master Sergeant, I am not!”
“Which piece of shit colony are you from, Cadet Private Nola Vklogg?”
“I am from Grafe, Master Sergeant!”
“Grafe? Grafe! Do you hear that, you pus bag whores? We have a Grafian here!” Kim shoved his face into Cadet Private Vklogg’s, pressing his nose against her nose. “I bet you think you’re better than all of us, don’t you Cadet Private Nola Vklogg? I bet you think you can buy us all out with your riches and make us your slaves, right? When you go to the can, you probably shit diamonds and corphia crystals? Each time you flush, you flush my year’s salary down the shitter. That make you feel special, Cadet Private Nola Vklogg?”
“I do not feel special, Master Sergeant! I am here to serve Central Space Command and fight against the Estelian threat to Earth and all of her colonies!”
“Is that so?” Kim laughed as he stepped back and looked Cadet Private Vklogg up and down. “A real patriot? Is that what we have here? Don’t tell me you volunteered. Please don’t tell me that.”
Cadet Private Vklogg just stood there.
“Well, I’ll be blown by a pack of wiccs,” Kim laughed. “You did volunteer! Your parents must be very proud.”
Cadet Private Vklogg winced at the mention of her parents.
“Uh-oh,” Kim grinned from ear to ear. “I smell trouble in rich people land. Your parents aren’t proud, are they? They’re actually disappointed that the bribes they paid when you were born went to waste, am I right? All those credits just gone because you want to do your duty and kill doublegangers. They probably won’t speak to you anymore, right? Am I right, Cadet Private Vklogg?”
“No, Master Sergeant!”
“I’m sorry, did you just say no?”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
“So your parents are speaking to you, Cadet Private Vklogg?”
“No, Master Sergeant! My parents were killed last year during the assault on the Benesheer, Master Sergeant! Along with my entire family! I escaped in a lifepod and was picked up by a CSC cruiser, Master Sergeant!”
“Well, fuck me standing on one leg,” Kim nodded. “I have been corrected. Your rich fucking family died while vacationing on the most expensive spaceliner in the galaxy, you escaped with your black skin intact, and now you want to go out and get your tits blown off by doublegangers? Is that what you are telling me?”
“I want to do my duty and kill Estelians, Master Sergeant!”
“You want revenge, is what you want,” Kim chuckled. “You know what revenge does to the mind, Cadet Private Vklogg? It warps it! It makes it do stupid things! Like fucking enlist in the CSC corps! That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard! You are a fucking moron, Cadet Private Vklogg! An A-one, prime moron!”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
“What is the name of your scorcher, Cadet Private Vklogg?”
“Nastua, Master Sergeant!”
“Was that your mother’s name?”
“No, Master Sergeant!”
“Was it your grandmother’s name?”
“No, Master Sergeant! It was the name of my baby girl, Master Sergeant! She was vaporized in the nursery during the first wave of the attack!”
“Now you want her to vaporize some doublegangers, is that it?”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
“Fucking-A right, you do! Now shut the fuck up and let me deal with these other shitstains! You! The fucking slant-eyed ginger! How in the perfect science of genetics did you end up with slant eyes and curly red hair?”
“Good genes, Master Sergeant!” replied a short young man, looking exactly as Kim described him.
“Do you see my eyes, you little mongrel?”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
“Are they slant eyed like yours?”
“Yes, Master Sergeant!”
“Is my hair jet black?”