"Probably not. So why not just go back to work and forget us?"
"Best idea I've ever heard from you." She stamped out.
Penny said, "She isn't very nice, is she?"
"Don't let her fool you. That was all show." I had seen a mischievous twinkle in her eye.
"So what now?"
"We wait. That's mostly what I do. Sit. Watch. Wait. If you're tired you can have the bed. I'll get a folding chair out of the corner."
"I couldn't do that."
"Why not?"
"People use it for. . Well, you know."
I knew, but I was a jaded old cynic. "A bed is a bed, girl, with some more comfortable than others. When you're tired whatever else happened there doesn't matter. Though you might be smart to see how big the bugs are before you take the plunge."
"Mr. Garrett! Do you have to be a jerk all the time?"
"You bring out the worst in me. Do you want the bed or not? Because if you're going to be all bluestocking, I'll snag it for myself. I'm not the gentleman you think I am."
"I believe that would make you exactly the man I think you are, sir. I will sit out the night on a folding chair, thank you."
"Suit yourself. Turn the lamp down when you're ready. And don't lock the door. People will come to see us at some point."
Yes. I was that way with the kid. She wanted to be part of the household on Macunado Street, I would treat her like family.
I climbed into the bed.
It was a far better bed than the one it had replaced. It was miles better than the cot.
It was a comfortably cool night so I just stretched out on the covers. Despite the excitement, the strange bed, and the fact that I had had nothing to drink, I fell asleep immediately. Despite the fact that even after she turned the lamp down I could see a sour-faced teenager scowling my way if I cracked an eyelid.
93
"So what is this?"
Was that Belinda?
"Do you believe this?"
The question died in a great, roaring snore from Morley Dotes.
I was on my back, the right side of me pressed against the wall. I did not feel inclined to be awake and sociable so I pretended I was asleep.
Strafa said, "I thought yours would give in to temptation first."
"Obviously you thought wrong."
I detected some amusement in both voices.
I rolled toward them, away from the wall.
All right.
I got it.
I wasn't alone.
Penny had her back to me. She was balanced precariously on the edge but she was in the same bed. And the old women were having fun with that.
That folding chair must have gotten awful hard.
When I rolled she moved too, both of us into the slight depression in the middle.
Belinda and Strafa each said something that did not flatter me.
But for Penny I would have said something juvenile to irritate them.
Then Strafa won me back. "We'd better get Penny up first. Carefully. Otherwise, she'll die of embarrassment."
"Really? She's snuggled up to him in the same bed."
"Please. Be empathetic for one minute of your life."
Wow. That was my girl telling Belinda Contague to develop a human side. A-maz-ing!
Belinda bowed to Strafa's demands because Strafa was the Windwalker, Furious Tide of Light, who could turn her into a pond's worth of frogs.
I went on pretending to be a sleeping frog in need of the kiss of a princess. I did nothing while Strafa extricated a muzzy Penny from a situation likely to cause a panic attack.
DeeDee and Mike turned up before the ladies started on Morley and me. They brought a meal suitable for the empress of the Combine and her dearest henchfolk. DeeDee fussed over Morley till Mike, high on surviving the night, herded her out.
Miss Tea had little to say, otherwise. She stood by looking grim. She was extremely unhappy.
Strafa read her perfectly. "We'll clear out shortly, ma'am."
Belinda nodded. "As soon as Mr. Dotes is fed and ready to travel."
Strafa said, "We blundered. We misread a situation completely, then panicked."
"Misread, huh?" I said. "Like how?" Her angle might have been different.
"The Palace Guards were all for show. Prince Rupert wanted somebody to see that he could come down hard on busybodies."
"Rupert didn't send them. The King did."
"Whatever, Rupert is at the house now." Strafa's laughter was pure music. "Wait till you see his headgear. He is determined not to have his mind read." She described a monster rat's nest of silver mesh and tangle. "We never told him that the Dead Man is asleep."
"We?" Had there been a party while I was away?
"Easy, boy."
Belinda said, "You'll have to get used to him getting his exercise by jumping to conclusions."
Strafa said, "If we hurry, lover, I can get you there before Rupert's men finish cleaning up."
"That doesn't sound good. What happened? What did you do?"
"Well. . After I moved Penny and Playmate, Bell and I started picking off Palace Guards. You were right. Some were patrolmen from the Hill."
"Picking off? What does that mean?"
I was a little loud. Mike had to pop out to the hallway to reassure her security goons.
Belinda said, "Is it too much to ask that you just relax and listen, Garrett? What possible use is there to you bellowing and stomping like a bull in rut?"
"It helps me pretend that I have some kind of control over my own life."
Miss Contague let loose a championship sigh. She looked at Strafa. "And you really want to partner up with this dope?"
"He'll be all right. You'll see. He just needs a chance to relax. He's been away for a long time." She gave me a big happy puppy dog look.
How the hell can you go on being grumpy when a beautiful woman looks at you like you're the culmination of the man-creation process and she just adores you? How, when you look back at her, get caught up in a little heavy breathing, and she gets just a hint of virginal blush to her cheeks?
Belinda muttered, "I think I'm going to puke. So. Let's move out. Let's go storm the ramparts of reality."
Strafa said, "Garrett and I will go ahead so he can see the Crown Prince. Please bring the young miss with you and Mr. Dotes." She turned to Mike. "And thank you so much for your hospitality, Miss Teagarden."
Belinda agreed. "Yeah. Twice, now. You've won a special place in my heart, Mike. You want some special considerations, ask. Just don't be unreasonable."
Miss Tea inclined her head in a ghost of a bow. "A bit more flexibility in the way we are permitted to operate wouldn't be amiss."
The upcoming negotiation should be fascinating.
I got no chance to find out. Strafa dragged me to the window. I whined, "Why can't we go out the front door like regular people?"
"Because we're special people and the regular people need to be reminded."
I glanced at Penny as I clambered out, twisting, turning, picking up scratches and scrapes. The girl seemed forlorn but she had not melted down in shame.
94
Westman Block and a clutch of red tops infested my stoop and the street in front of my house. Strafa, a broom, and I slid down through the morning air. They spotted us as Strafa eased up to my window. Block had a lot to say down there but I couldn't hear him over Strafa's grumbling. I gave him a big grin and a bold thumbs up.
Strafa was exasperated. "It's shut again."
"What is?"
"The window. Somebody keeps shutting it while I'm gone." She made gestures and muttered sourly.
I could guess who had done the shutting. I wasn't sure why.