Girlology: A Girl's Guide to Stuff that Matters

When you were about two, you started learning the names for parts of your body. Your parents were so proud when you pointed your chubby little finger to your face and said “nose” and “eyes.” They would brag to all their friends about how smart you were. Now, why on earth would they forget to tell you the names of your “private parts”? After all, when you were born, you can bet it was one of the first parts of you they wanted to see. Boy or girl? Girl! Well yay, you are a girl. So why not know the names for those girl parts? Even better, why not know what all those parts are for?!

When it comes to seeing what your private parts look like, we think boys have a major advantage. If you have ever seen a naked boy or man (we’re thinking brothers, dads, little boys you baby-sit, but hopefully not someone running naked around your neighborhood), you probably noticed that their “private parts” aren’t as private as girls’ parts are. In fact, they are hanging and wiggling right there on the outside. When a little boy starts to potty train, he learns to hold his penis to aim it in the toilet . . . hopefully. So boys have been looking at and holding their private parts all of their lives.

For girls, on the other hand, we don’t need to hold any of our parts to go to the bathroom (Look Ma! No hands!). And in case you’ve ever tried to look, you know we can’t see much from above except some skin folds. Our private parts are a little more private, and they are pretty hard to see unless you use a mirror. You are probably crinkling up your nose and saying, “Ewwww, gross,” right now. But there’s nothing gross about your body parts. Without them, you’d have some major problems!

We encourage you to use a mirror to have a look. You might want to use a flashlight, too. Sometimes it helps to put one foot up on a chair or the toilet. Better yet, put your mirror on the floor and squat down over it. Have you ever tried it? Are you grossed out? Don’t be. Go ahead! It’ll probably feel a little awkward at first, but it’s painless, and actually pretty interesting. You look at your face every day, right? You should definitely look at your girl parts every once in a while, too.

For now, the main reason to look at yourself is to satisfy your curiosity and to get smarter about your body. Once you learn all the parts that girls have, you’ll want to see for yourself that all your parts are present and accounted for! At other times, like when you use a tampon and later in life when you are involved in sexual activity, there will be other good reasons to understand your anatomy and how things work.

The easiest way to learn all the parts is to start with the “outside” parts and then learn about the “inside” parts. The outside parts are what most girls mean when they are talking about “down there.” So let’s go over some of them.

The Outside Parts

In general, the outside girl parts are called the vulva (not Volvo—that’s a car). It’s a name that includes a lot of other parts, kind of like how your face includes your cheeks, eyes, nose, mouth and so on. Your vulva includes two holes, a lot of skin folds and some “padding.” The definitions are listed below. You’ll be expected to spell and use each word correctly in a sentence at the end of this chapter . . . just kidding!

Vulva—the name for most of the outside “female parts,” including the labia majora and minora, urethra, vaginal opening and the surrounding skin. It is also called “external genitalia.” The word genitals refers to the body parts on boys and girls that are involved in making a baby (we’ll get to that later). The parts of the vulva are listed next.Labia majora—the outer lips that will become covered with hair as your body grows and develops. They provide a fatty layer of protection for the other sensitive parts of the vulva.Labia minora—the inner lips. They come in lots of different sizes, shapes and colors, but for you, they should be about the same size on each side. They may be bigger than the outer lips. They may also look darker and wrinkled or they may be pink and smooth. Yours may not look exactly like the drawing, and that’s okay.Clitoris—the bump just inside the top of the labia. It contains tons of nerve fibers and is very sensitive to touch. Rubbing it or stroking it feels good and usually creates sexual pleasure for females. During sexual excitement, it may become a little bit bigger and stiffer. It is protected by a flap of skin called the clitoral hood. If you pull back on that skin, you can see the clitoris better (it won’t hurt, go ahead and try it!).Urethra—the “pee” hole or opening where urine comes out. It’s the first opening below the clitoris. It is also pretty sensitive when touched or rubbed, but it’s not a “feels good” kind of sensitivity. If the urethra is rubbed too much, it can actually become irritated and cause mild burning when you urinate.Vaginal opening—the opening of the vagina (duh). It’s not always “open,” but it will open if you put something in it, like your finger or a tampon. More about the vagina when we get to the “inside” parts, too . . . bet you just can’t wait!Hymen—a small rim of tissue that is at the rim of the vaginal opening. It can be tender if you try to stretch it or push hard on it. Hymens come in a lot of different shapes and sizes, too. Once you reach puberty, the hymen becomes thicker and more elastic with a “ruffled” edge. That makes it kind of hard to see among all the folds and flaps “down there.” Using a tampon will not necessarily tear your hymen because it can usually stretch to allow something that size through it. All girls are born with a hymen, but once you are a teenager, the way the hymen looks does not necessarily show whether or not you have had sex. A lot of people put a big emphasis on the hymen because it supposedly “tears” and bleeds the first time you have sex. The reality is that some women or girls will have a small amount of bleeding when they first have intercourse, and some don’t have any. It may just depend on how relaxed and ready for sex she is.Perineum (pear uh NEE um)—the thicker tissue that is between the bottom of the vaginal opening and the anus.Mons—the fatty mound where pubic hair grows in a shape like an upside-down triangle. The mons also provides a fatty padding to cover your pubic bone, which can hurt if it is bumped too hard.Groin—the area on your front side where your legs are connected to your trunk. Pubic hair usually grows to this point or may grow past it onto your upper thighs. If you shave your pubic hair for your bathing suit line, you may notice some small “knots” in this area. Those knots are lymph nodes or glands that get bigger when there is irritation or infection on the skin (like razor rash or ingrown hairs). The knots should go away in time. If they become larger, tender or won’t go away, see your doctor. You can help prevent razor rash and ingrown hairs by using soap or shaving cream and a new, clean razor every time you need to shave. Shave the hair in the same direction that it grows out of the skin.

Hair, Where?!

While we’re on the subject of pubic hair . . . let’s talk about whether to groom it or not. First of all, shaving or “de-hairing” legs and armpits is fine if you want to. Some girls don’t. Some girls want to shave off all of their hair “down there.” Is it a good idea? It’s definitely okay to get rid of unwanted hair that might poke out of your bathing suit, but do you need to remove all of it? We think not. In fact, girls who remove all of their mons hair can develop skin infections that become big abscesses full of pus. Ewwww and ouch!

Girls who shave or remove all of the hair around their vaginal opening can also get skin infections, but more often, they develop skin irritation from vaginal discharge. See, when you have hair around the vaginal opening, it helps absorb and remove the discharge to keep it from sticking to your skin. Vaginal discharge has a pH (a chemistry thing) that can be irritating to the skin—more about that when we talk about the inside parts.