There were dead animals in the road too. Armadillos, porcupines and even a couple of dogs. Cars ran them over in the night and kept on going.
Their bodies were torn open and they still seemed to be bleeding because the rain had kept the blood fresh. Flesh burst from the fur like cotton from a ripped sofa.
‘Here ya go, Ease, maybe this brighten up yo’ face.’ Mouse put a fat envelope, folded from a sheet of newspaper, on the dashboard in front of me.
‘What’s that?’
‘I might not be able t’read like ole Dom but I can count like anything,’ he said.
Another time that might have gotten a rise out of me but those days were over.
‘Yeah,’ Mouse said. ‘I cain’t read but I can count to three hundred in my sleep.’
I didn’t say a word. I wouldn’t even look at the envelope.
‘What’s wrong wichyou, man?’ he asked me.
‘Ain’t nuthin wrong.’
‘Then why you cain’t even talk?’
‘Ain’t got nuthin t’say, that’s all.’
‘Yeah. I know.’ He stared at me for a moment, then went on, ‘Easy, I want you t’take that money. It’s yours an’ it would be a insult t’me if you leave it lyin’ there fo’Otum t’take.’
I said, ‘Where you get that money?’
‘Fount it.’
‘Fount it where?’
‘Out t’Reese’s place. I mean he got a will say ev’rything go to Navrochet. But you know he owed me sumpin’ so I just look at it like this here money I got is mines.’
‘How much was it?’
He pointed to the envelope. ‘That there’s just a piece of it.’
I was quiet again.
‘You wanna know what happened, huh?’ He was grinning at me.
‘I don’t wanna know nuthin’.’
‘Yeah you do. You think I did sumpin’ wrong, don’t you? You think I murdered Reese, don’t you?’
Mouse sat back and put his foot on the dash. He was getting ready to tell me another story, but I had lost my love of his tales.
‘Ya see, Ease, it started wit’ Clifton. I knew he could he’p convince Reese about gettin’ up offa that money an’ I also knew that Ernestine was young enough and wild enough an’ she like Jo enough that she might give Dom a li’l pussy. You know Dom could use some’a that. So I went an’ tole Big Jim ‘bout what I knew ‘bout Clifton.’
‘You tole the law?’
‘Yeah, I can’t be lyin’ ‘round Jo ‘cause she so good she even got me. Anyway Clifton did beat that boy so it ain’t like I was lyin’ t’Jim. Only I didn’t tell Jim where Clifton was. Ya see, I’as givin’ him a chance.’
‘Uh-huh!’
‘I had Clifton buried out in the woods at night while I was layin’ up wit’ Theresa. I tole him that I was watchin’ for Jim. Clifton was so scared that he couldn’t even sleep. He’da done anything I said. So I warned ‘im that Big Jim was gonna get’im sooner or later unless he got far away, an’ then I tole him bout Reese’s money.
‘Ya see, I figgered we’d rob Reese, it was my due anyway. An’ Clifton went along wit’ it after some convincin’. I give Clifton a shotgun I borrowed from Sweet William. I tole Reese Clifton was a killer an’ we was gonna have it. He was a mess, Easy. He smelled from garlic, I guess he thought that would save him from voodoo. It was pitiful.’ There was glee in Mouse’s voice. ‘But I was gonna have that money. We put’im in that bamboo basket an’ told’im we was gonna shoot’im ‘less he climb outta there an’ show us to the money.’
Mouse was savouring every moment of the torture. He really believed that he hadn’t done anything wrong.
‘But then that fool Clifton had to grab me an’ th’ow off my kick. If you’d hadn’ta run Reese down I’d be dead now. Shit. I’m lucky my gun landed near Clifton, ‘cause you know Reese woulda beat me t’death with that shotgun.’
‘An’ then you fount the money?’ I asked.
‘Yeah.’ Mouse was staring out over the panorama of his brilliant future. He saw black-and-white dice through glasses of amber whiskey. He saw EttaMae in cashmere and silk. Somewhere there were children calling out, ‘Daddy.’ And all the while Reese lay in the ground, turning to sludge.
‘If you fount that money when he was dead, then why couldn’t you have fount it when he was packed in that box?’
Mouse laid those cold eyes on me.
‘Yeah,’ he said. ‘You right.’
‘And I don’t believe it, Raymond.’
‘You’ont believe what?’
‘I don’t believe that Clifton shot Reese. That boy had his hands full tryin’ t’hold his guts in.’
It was like I had forgotten who I was, and where I was; and who I was with. Maybe it was because I had a full stomach and I sat behind the wheel of a nice car. Maybe it was all that money up on the dashboard.
For a moment there I thought that the truth was more important than the need to survive.
Mouse winced and nodded. I realised that I had caught him in a lie.
‘You right,’ he said again.
I turned away from his cold stare only to see the red blood of a fat bug smear across the windshield.
‘An’ that’s why I need ya t’take this here money, Ease.’ He pointed at the envelope again. ‘Because you the on’y one got my confidence. You the on’y one know why I come down here an’ you the on’y one know what happened. If you don’t take that money then I know you against me.’ He looked at me with a plain face.
But this time that face wasn’t hiding laughter. His voice was the whisper of death, the slither of a snake over the nape of my neck.
Death had always been a part of my life. He lived in my neighbourhood, in my apartment building, right next door to me. But I’d never worried about him coming knocking. I was innocent and I knew that I would live forever.
But at that moment I realised that the wrong words would cut my life down to seconds or, at the most, just a few days. And I also knew that whatever I said would be my first words as a man in this world.
I reached out for the bundle and said, ‘Thanks, Ray.’
Mouse laughed and slapped my knee.
I had survived again. I had risked my life to save Clifton only to fail. But I had survived that failure. I was following in my father’s fleet footsteps: standing up when I couldn’t take any more and then running to fight another day.
Mouse started telling me how hungry Theresa was for love. I didn’t care.
When we saw Houston in the distance Mouse said, ‘You know, Easy, when I was standin’ there listenin’ t’Peters preach, somethin’ touched me, I don’t know if it was God or the devil or what, but it felt like all the pain and fear I ever known was gone. I been scared’a Reese day and night for my whole life and now he’s dead.’ A smile of pure joy spread across his face; tears sprouted from his eyes. ‘An’ I’ma be married and Fma be happy fo’ the rest’a my years.’
Chapter Fifteen
Back in those days rent was two dollars a week and you could eat your fill on a quarter a day. I had three hundred dollars; I could’ve lived for more than a year on that.
But I wasn’t careful. I bought a quart bottle of bourbon every other day and sat in that room, stinking and drinking. Most of the time I was too drunk to worry about it. But late at night the demons would come at me.
I was a part of the murder of a man’s father. Me, Ezekiel Rawlins, the man who worried after his own father for years. It’s not that I cared for Reese but murder is a sin that burns your soul.
And to help a man murder his father...
People came to my door but I didn’t answer it. They’d knock and call my name but I’d lie in the bed and bite my pillow. I’d shut my eyes tight against the sound and finally they’d leave.