Here’s a quick primer on the Goons: I’ve mentioned No-Face a couple of times. He’s got a flap of scarred skin that hangs down from where a normal man’s eyebrows should be, covering his face like a curtain. There’s a tiny gap on the left side of the flesh-mask where a single pale eye peers out. Perhaps because his eyesight is iffy, he tends to strike anything that moves when he’s in combat, which is why he pegged Infidel that one time. He’s bald, his whole scalp covered with pale, shiny scars from the countless brawls he’s been in. They say he was sold as a baby to a traveling circus for display as a freak, but by the time he was eight he was big and mean enough to take up pit-fighting. Now, he’s seven feet tall, but manages to look squat due to the thickness of his muscles. The only armor he wears is a chain-mail vest; his only weapon is a fifty pound iron ball at the end of a long chain that he keeps rolled around his forearm. I’ve heard he feeds himself by pounding his victims into pulp with the ball, then sucking the remains under his flap into whatever mouth is hidden there.
Next on the Goon roster is Reeker, a half-seed. Half-seeding is a variant of blood magic, suppressed by the church but never wiped out. Women who wish to get pregnant visit blood-houses to acquire specially prepared animal semen to, shall we say, supplement contributions from their husbands. In theory, the mix of animal and human sperm produces children with desirable qualities. A half-seed bull child will be strong and willful. A half-seed panther, agile and silent. No one knows if Reeker’s mother meant to purchase skunk juice, or if she got burned by an unscrupulous blood-house. The product was a man who can emit odors at will from every bodily orifice. The stench can bring even the toughest fighter to his knees. When Reeker’s not actively shooting out stink clouds, he’s still got a wet-dog whiff to him that makes you envy No-Face’s lack of nose.
Unlike No-Face, Reeker doesn’t have a scar on him. No one ever gets close enough to land a punch. He’s learned to spit a gob of the worst smelling phlegm you can imagine up to twenty feet, and he’s more than happy to cut a gagging man’s throat to put him out of his misery. Reeker matches his dastardly combat style with a personality that’s all leers and crude jokes. Yet, for reasons I’ve never understood, he’s popular with women, even women who aren’t whores. He’s got a dumpy physique, and, at five-foot-nine, looks tiny next to the other Goons. Maybe it’s his hair. Above a pasty, round face, he’s got a thick, wavy, black mane that any woman would envy, sporting two snow-white streaks running back from his temples.
The final Goon is Menagerie. He’s about six four and skinny as a rail. He’s normally dressed in a loincloth and sandals, showing off the animal tattoos covering him from the crown of his shaved head to the little gaps between his toes. Most of the animals are predators. He’s got lions, tigers, bears, ohmis (a jungle viper), sharks, and eagles. Being tattooed in Commonground rarely earns you a second glance, though Menagerie has taken his skin art further than the average sailor. What makes Menagerie stand out is that his tattoos are alive, inked in the blood of the various beasts, and infused with their spirits. Stare at them long enough and you’ll swear they’re breathing. No one has ever actually seen one move, but one day the shark will be on his right shoulder, the next day on his left thigh, like it’s swimming around. That’s a neat trick, but it’s not what makes him dangerous. Menagerie’s a shape-shifter. He can surrender his body to any of these spirits, taking on their forms in the blink of an eye. The people he fights face off with a tall, skinny, unarmed man, and two seconds later they’ve had their hand bitten off by an alligator, their guts raked by a tiger, and have a rattlesnake clamped down on their jugular.
Remember I told you that No-Face wasn’t the Goon people were really afraid of? Menagerie is the Goon people are really afraid of.
Back to the confrontation: Aurora clenched her fists. “Stand aside. What you’re saying makes no sense.”
Menagerie shook his head. “We both know that everything the Black Swan does makes sense, even if we mere mortals are blind to the logic.”
Reeker spit out his toothpick. “Heh. Maybe the bar ain’t profitable now that Stagger’s pushing daisies.”
If it was possible to die from a mean look, Reeker would have joined me in the afterlife from the glare Infidel gave him. No-Face found the crack funny, judging from the muffled, farting, “hur hur hur,” that filtered from beneath his face flap.
Menagerie raised his hand. Reeker looked instantly chagrined. No-Face’s spooky chuckle went silent.
“I apologize for the insensitivity of my colleagues,” the tattooed man said to Infidel. “Stagger was a beloved brother in the larger family of Commonground. I, for one, shall miss him.”
“Yeah,” said Reeker. “I kind of liked the guy. There going to be a funeral? I’ll send flowers.”
“The funeral was private,” said Infidel. “And I don’t want to talk about Stagger any more. I want to talk about the dragon hunt you boys are going on. I want in.”
“As do I,” said Relic, hobbling up beside the women.
Menagerie looked down at the hunchback. “Who the hell are you?”
“Infidel calls me Relic. This will serve.”
“Uh-huh,” said Menagerie. “I can’t help but notice that you look, um… less than formidable. While I can’t confirm the existence of any upcoming dragon hunts, may I ask what, exactly, would you bring to the table?”
“Knowledge,” said Relic. “I’ve survived Greatshadow’s lair before. My experience may provide the difference between success and failure.”
“Is that so?” said Menagerie.
The hunchback nodded.
“Be that as it may, I am not in charge of hiring for any missions that may or may not be occurring soon,” said Menagerie. “The Black Swan may have been conducting transactions of this nature, but to reiterate, she’s now closed to all business.”
Aurora clenched her fists. “Menagerie, who do you think you’re fooling? You know I know all about the mission. Get the hell out of my way. I’m talking to the Black Swan.” She stepped forward, looking ready to push the mercenaries aside.
Reeker spit a gob of pale green phlegm toward her eyes. The wad crackled as it froze inches from her skin, bouncing harmlessly off her cheek, its foul payload neutralized. She punched out with an ice-gauntleted fist, sending the skunk-man flying toward the edge of the dock. He landed on his feet with inches to spare, but momentum was against him. He stumbled backward, and vanished over the edge with a splash.
No-Face swung his chain-draped fist and caught Aurora beneath the chin, hard enough that the frost coating her face flew off in a spray. She went down, landing flat on her back, as snow danced in the air where she’d just stood. She started to rise, but before she could sit up, Menagerie leapt toward her, taking the form of a huge, black-horned ram. His head smashed into Aurora’s tusks with a loud, sharp crack. Aurora’s arms flopped to her side as she stared up into the pale morning sky, cross-eyed and dazed.
Infidel grinned. This was her oh-good-there’s-a-fight-and-I-was-wanting-to-hit-someone grin. She punched No-Face right where his mouth should have been. He staggered backward, stopping when his back slammed into the locked door of the Black Swan. Infidel kicked him in the gut, shattering the wood behind him, knocking him inside.
Infidel spun to face Menagerie, who’d leapt into the air as a ram. In the span of a heartbeat, his body flowed into a fifteen-foot-long shark, his mouth stretched wide enough to clamp onto Infidel’s face. She raised both hands, shielding herself with her forearms as the toothy jaws snapped shut. There was a loud crunch. Bright fragments of white teeth showered onto the docks. For half a second, the shark hung there, clamped onto Infidel’s unbreakable arms. Infidel head-butted the shark in the snout. The big fish flew off, and Menagerie was once again human as he landed ass-first on the dock, blood streaming from his nose.