She wanted to blame his berserker for his lack of control, but she'd sensed the man inside the monster as it spoke. He'd seemed pleased to have killed his own father.
Lying in her bed past nine, she couldn't make herself get up. Maybe if she slept long enough, she'd wake to find it had all been a bad dream. Gunnar was a lot of things, but a murderer? He killed to protect, period. Yes, a part of him liked it, but that was the animal conquering weaker prey. She couldn't believe he would actively seek to kill his own family. There had to be more to the story than he'd told her.
Didn't there?
His team had always stuck by him. Her grandmother favored Gunnar over the others. Would any of them do that if he'd actually done such horrible things? Sure, everyone deserved a second chance, but some sins, in Ava's mind, were too horrible for atonement. Had she been so wrong about Gunnar for so long? Was Ava like her grandmother, trusting the wrong man because she thought she loved him?
The similarities in their plights were too bizarre, and Ava knew she needed to talk about this. Except when she called her grandmother's office, Keegan answered.
He told her Mrs. Sharpe had left for Washington last night. Something about critical funding issues.
“Aren't you supposed to be with Sheridan and Olivia?” she asked.
“Sorry, Ava. Price and I are under strict orders to stick with Mrs. Sharpe, and that's what we're doing. Damned woman gave us the slip. Now we have to find her and bring her back. Admiral London's not happy she's gone, and we're worried this might some type of ploy to draw her out from the Circs and put her in danger. Don't worry about Sheridan and Olivia. Kisho and Morgan took charge of the rest of our team. They and the psychics are guarding the women.”
“Terrific.” She sighed. “Well, go get Alicia and haul her back. Put all expenses on the corporate card.”
“Will do.” Keegan hung up.
She dropped the phone onto its cradle, wondering what else could go wrong.
“Ava, we've got a problem.” Kisho startled her out of her musings. He stood at her bedroom door, and he made it a point to respect personal space.
“Why aren't you with Sheridan and Olivia?”
“I sent Morgan ahead with them. I'll join him after we talk.”
“Great. Pile on.” She waved him inside. “I take it the problem you're referring to is my grandmother taking off for Washington without telling anyone.”
“What? Since when?”
“According to Keegan, she left last night.”
“Uh-oh. Now this wasn't supposed to happen.” He frowned. “In my vision, she's here when Admiral London arrives and shoots her.”
“Okay, say that again.”
Kisho sighed. “Your grandmother didn't just believe Admiral London was guilty on the basis of Melissa Ramirez. She had a vision I shared.”
“Has that happened before?” Ava sat up, her back against her headboard. Clad in a T-shirt and underwear and covered at the waist by a thin sheet, she didn't worry about modesty. Especially since the only man she wanted sexually—her mate, Mr. Murderer—had made it plainly apparent they could never be anything but distant friends, if that.
“No. Mrs. Sharpe and I usually see different futures. The fact that we saw the same one upset us both. In it, Admiral London stared down your grandmother and shot her without blinking an eye.”
“You have got to be kidding me.”
“I wish I was. She was here in her office when he shot her, point-blank. She fell behind her desk. Shouts and fighting outside.” His eyes flickered, and a haze of psychic energy clouded between them.
Ava had a feeling he experienced it all over again. “All hell broke loose.” Kisho blinked. “But now… I don't understand. I still see it happening.” Something in Ava snapped. She refused to consider Admiral Geoffrey London her enemy. Because if Grandma could be wrong about him, then Ava might be wrong about Gunnar. And she couldn't imagine living without him. Even if he was a lying, stubborn, arrogant son of a bitch.
Her beast rose to the surface. “I don't care what you've seen. Lonnie is on our side. I'll prove it when he arrives tomorrow. Now, you join Morgan and cling to Sheridan and Olivia like glue. Keegan and James are after my grandmother, and I have a feeling they won't mind knocking her out and dragging her ass back.” She knew the way Keegan worked. Her grandmother was in for an unpleasant surprise when they caught up with her.
“But the vision—”
“Will play out as it's meant to or disappear. You know you can't always change everything.”
“I know.” Kisho paused. “But Ava, your grandmother has come to mean the world to me. I love Morgan, and she means the world to him. I won't let anything happen to her.”
“Then don't. Stick Olivia and Sheridan with Doc and his Circs for protection.
Then become Alicia's personal shadow.” A terrific plan.
He frowned. “I don't see her okay with that.”
“I know.” Ava gave him a sly grin. “Consider it payback for all the meddling she's done in your life.”
“She gave me Morgan. How can I hate that?”
Ava leaned forward to stroke Kisho's cheek. “Morgan is so lucky to have you.
But trust me when I say the woman is a busybody. You have no idea how you've been manipulated.”
His eyes narrowed.
“I'll tell you all about it when this vision and our troubles are over.”
“We're Circ. Our troubles will never be over.”
“You have a point,” she conceded. And though she hated to ask, she found her lips moving anyway. “Seen Gunnar lately?”
A ghost of a frown crossed his face. “No, and Jules isn't happy about it. I don't see anything negative in Tersch's future, but he's in a bad way. I know it.”
“He's always in a bad way,” she muttered. “I killed him, and sick fuck that I am, I loved him. I loved all of them, you know. But I love you even more.” Could her life suck any more? To finally hear his declaration of love, right before he threatened to murder her because of it? The man seriously owed her one hell of an explanation.
She glanced up to see Kisho's sober expression. “What?”
“Ava, Gunnar's had a thing for you from day one. It's grown worse. He's infatuated, obsessed, in love, call it what you will. But he's afraid to hurt you.”
“So he said.” In detail.
“You don't know how he suffered, and he'll never tell you.” Kisho looked sad.
“He's one of the most generous people I know, though he'd be mortified to hear me tell it. I can't know how bad his past was because I didn't live it, but I do know he lived with an abusive father for most of his young life. There's tragedy there, and some of it's due to the wildness that lurks beneath his heart.” An abusive father? That started to put things into perspective. Odd she'd never read of that in his detailed files.
“He needs you, Ava. He needs you to be whole. His rages worry me; they're getting worse. I know you can help calm him, but you have to make him see what we all know—that he'd never hurt his mate. Not in a million years.” The faith Kisho had for his friend made her ashamed she'd doubted Gunnar.
“I admit,” he continued, “his berserker can be alarming. But in all the time we've been together, he's never harmed me. He's been rough, aggressive, and at times downright dominant. But he's my friend, and I hate to see him hurting like he is.”
“I'll try, Kisho. But he's been avoiding me. I talked to him yesterday.” She blinked away angry tears of frustration and remorse. “It didn't go well.”
“Morgan and I figured as much when we saw you leave hand in hand but you returned alone and upset and smelling like one furious she-demon.” He held up his hands. His eyes crinkled. “Morgan's expression, not mine.”