I was soon deluged but was not allowed to rise. She retained me in that position while she and Gertrude chatted. She stretched out her hand for her glass. At intervals I kissed her. I determined now to excite her to please myself without waiting for her bidding. She kept me there and must take the consequences, so I determinedly inserted my tongue.
"Oh, you naughty boy! You naughty boy!" she cried moving violently and much more energetically. I could feel her flesh. I persisted tickling her clitoris with all my might; at last she was overcome and obliged to give me what she had before obliged me to receive.
"Oh, Julian! You have gained quite a little love victory of your own. Would you like now what you wanted so much that morning?"
"Oh, Mademoiselle!" I cried, at length released, my eyes sparkling. "Yes, yes, above all things!"
"Are you quite sure you want it still?" she asked, in her pretty teasing way. "Are you not"-delight in tantalising me-"too tired?"
"Oh, no, no, no! I do want it. Oh! Above all things."
"Very much-are you sure?"
"Oh, Mademoiselle!" I exclaimed, gazing at her, speechless from my delirium of delight. The idea of possessing or being possessed by that 218
exquisite being who had inspired me with such feelings towards her almost took away my senses.
"Very well; you must ask your mamma's permission first though."
"Please, Mamma," said I instantly, addressing myself to Gertrude. "Please, Mamma. May I do what Mademoiselle wants?"
"Oh, you wretch!" exclaimed Mademoiselle, again reclining on the couch. "What you want to do with me, you mean."
"What I want to do to her," I repeated.
"Whatever can that be?" said Gertrude, pretending to be puzzled and looking up with a horrid little smile at the ceiling affecting an air of absolute innocence.
"Please, Mamma, may I-"
"Well what?"
"May-may-may I fuck Mademoiselle?" and I hung my head and again covered my face with my hands.
"You indecent young rascal. How dare you? Mademoiselle, do you wish this boy to-to fuck you?" (How Gertrude, like other refined young ladies I have known, loved to say naughty words!)
"Yes, yes!" exclaimed Mademoiselle. "He must."
"Must!" exclaimed Gertrude. "Dear me. Well, you may, but you must do it before me."
"Come," said Mademoiselle eagerly, her hand already lifting her skirts.
"Oh, I hope-I hope-we shall have a baby!"
"Oh, you Monster!" exclaimed both the girls.
Mademoiselle drew me to her breast between her legs, and at last I lay in that paradise I had so longed to enter.
She was nicer, softer, and warmer than Gertrude. I lay upon her as though I had found everlasting peace after a long quest.
Gertrude stood over us. I never until then felt what nakedness was. My intense appreciation of it transfigured me with passion.
"I must feel how he does it," she said, placing her hand upon me.
Mademoiselle strained me to her bosom.
Gertrude's hand urged me to the delicious task I had to perform.
A pause, another long sigh, Mademoiselle's eyes softly closing, her mouth apart, her lips deliciously moist, as I entered further and beyond the gate, as she came more and more under the divine influence.
My whole being seemed to be concentrating itself in the spasm that was about to overtake me-it came. My love, my soul, my existence were conveyed to my sweet cruel mistress amid her soft inarticulate murmurs more grateful to my ears than any other music could be.
"How the little heart does beat!" exclaimed Gertrude, who would not even then remove her hand which, upon my highly excited nerves and sensitive organ, stimulated them almost to frenzy. I begged her to remove it.
"No, I shall not!" she said, still holding me tightly.
I feared she would rupture me.
"Have you been sufficiently-fucked?" asked the naughty Gertrude.
"Oh, Gertrude! Oh, Julian, you dear boy!" cried Mademoiselle, kissing me.
"Now come with me to my bedroom," said Gertrude. "How dare you behave like that to a young lady, you naked animal? And before your mamma, too!"
CHAPTER 14
"Now, into bed," she said, leading me to it, giving me a big bumper of red wine. "I shall come to you presently."
I lay dozing. Gertrude awoke me after some little time. She was as completely naked as myself.
"I will teach you that a young gentleman does not come to his mamma's bed to sleep!" she said, with a pleasantly menacing tone, slipping into the bed. I was on my back. She extended herself upon me, holding me close with one arm, while, with the other, she excited my virility in a way she knew to perfection, even more than Mademoiselle. This was the revenge of her jealousy!
Her being over me was a strange-a new experience to me. She pressed me down and I lay completely at her mercy. Her legs held me and I could not escape from the tight wedding ring she slipped off and on to Mons. Priapus, up and down, until he was beside himself, and kept him there.
"Now, Julian, not till I tell you, mind!"
She proceeded to work herself into an ecstasy of excitement, positively perspiring, glowing with her efforts, kissing me passionately. I restrained myself as well as I could.
"Oh! Ah! Oh, Gertrude! Oh, I must, I must!" The contact against mine of her breasts, of her hair, the extent to which she made me feel the fire of her eyes, excited me to distraction.
"Not yet," she answered. "You must not yet. You must restrain yourself. I will teach you to please a lady. You must not, without permission-you shall not!"
"Oh, oh, oh! What shall I do? Gertrude-my own!"
She increased my trial by playing with my testicles with her hand, covering my mouth with her dewy, little, unfolded rosebud of a mouth.
At last I felt her flush.
"Now," she said. "Good boy to have withstood so long-now-now"-in a soft low tone-"now-fuck your mamma."
A sigh-throb-throb-throb-throb-throb-throb-throb-throb.
"Oh, Julian, you angel!" as she at the same moment gave herself to the love fit.
"Well," thought I, "love makes life worth living. No wonder it is said to make the world go round!"
We fell asleep, and awoke not until the morning.
"Time to arise," then exclaimed Gertrude. "Go and get the chocolate. You will find it on the table outside the door-no, go as you are; yes, naked. I love to see you so. You look so interesting with that shame-faced look. Shame positively becomes you, you naughty, naughty boy, to have slept with your mamma!"
Before I went I kissed my mamma well on her face, eyes, mouth, inserted my tongue into her pink, seashell-like ears, descended to the red and white roses of her bosom, thence downwards along the Via Veneris.
I brought in the chocolate; we drank it very happily together.
"Julian, what are you dreading?" asked Gertrude, noticing a certain amount of gloom upon me, which was caused by my dread that that night would be the last of my joy, as Mademoiselle had expressed her determination to have me circumcised and castrated.
The Jews, I knew, were circumcised, and yet had plenty of children. It was the gelding, the castration, I feared.
I told Gertrude my dread.
"Mademoiselle will, I believe, have you circumcised, but I am equally certain you will have nothing more done to you. Mademoiselle is determined that you shall be punished for seducing Maud and that you shall bear the marks of her displeasure as long as you live. It won't do you any harm. Besides, she would be afraid to keep you with the girls unless you were so punished as to make her pretty sure you would not repeat the offence with Bee or Agnes."
"But does it hurt?"
"Yes, I think it does-like having your ears pierced; and you will be sore for quite eight days. Have you not read the Bible?"