"Gawd, sir," his bosun spat, "ain't just deserters. This here be a boy-fucker's buttock-shop. Center room, sir… musta been seven 'r eight o' th'… things… t'gither when we busted in, as evil'z…anythin'! Not all of 'em seamen, though, Mister Lewrie. Dramshop owner, e'z one, too. Caught 'im in th' front room, we did. Had 'im a lad in 'ere no bigger'n me youngest boy Tommy, th' bastard. Two of 'em'z ship's boys. An' a coupla… gen'lmenl"
Lewrie took a look in the front room. It was much larger than the other two chambers, part bed-chamber and parlour, and quite well furnished compared to the rest. A chubby old reprobate sat unmanacled on the edge of the high bedstead, trying to cover part of his nudity by shrouding his groin with his hands, wide-eyed and high-browed, and striving to appear as sheepishly innocent as a dog might, caught licking the Sunday roast. But cowering up by the pile of pillows, weeping fit to bust, was a cherub of a boy, not over ten years old.
"That… suet-arse was buggering that boyV Lewrie demanded.
" 'Pears he wuz, sir. In bed with 'im, naked'z Adam, anyways."
"You misconstrue, sir," the harmless-looking old bugger began to explain, shaking his head as if it was a very tiny, silly mistake. "I can assure you, sir, you see-"
"Save it!" Lewrie snapped. 'Tell it to the magistrate." The man gasped, paling with dread. Hauled before a court on a charge of sodomy, he'd face hanging for his peculiar tastes. A public whipping, then days festering in the stocks on display as his most hopeful prospect; but subject to the taunts, fruit, stones and physical abuse of the Mob. And few survived that, either.
"Didn' cuff 'im yet, sir… bein' a civilian'n all," the bosun commented. The 'Press had been sued before for even laying hands on civilians, no matter how briefly. And the bosun was a cautious, and experienced, Impress man. "T'other bugger'z in 'ere, sir."
Alan stomped to the door of the center chamber. There he saw what he could only construe as the aftermath of a backgammoner's orgy. Cheap, low beds lined the walls, feather mattresses and blankets stood service for the carpet. The room reeked of spilled rum, gin, brandy and ale. Several candles guttered in the corners, so the participants might take pleasure in observing, between bouts. Even by that guttery light, Lewrie could pick out several seamen, and a pair of snot-nosed, shivering ship's boys, from the pasty-skinned, maggot-pale civilians.
One of the civilians-again, unfettered-had hurriedly dressed. His clothes were elegant and expensive-silks and satins, fine-cut figured velvet coat and breeches, expensive shoes, the accoutrements of a courtly salon slug. And a courtier's smug airs.
"I am a gentleman, sir," he began, with a sneer at discovering an officer to whom he could complain. "I am a civilian. I am not, nor have I ever been, a sailor, sir. Therefore you have no authority over me, and I insist you let me pass, at once!"
"But you are a bugger, ain't you?" Lewrie countered. "What if we just call for the 'Charlies' and hold you 'til a magistrate comes?"
"You would not dare, sir," the slim young courtier simpered. "No magistrate would sanction the 'Press in his domain, sir, even were he aware of your presence… which awareness I most sincerely doubt," the man shot back, sure of his ground. "Show me your warrant, sir, or confess that your actions this evening have no sanction."
Damme, Lewrie groaned; a bloody sea lawyer! And, no, we don't have a warrant to show. That's why we were successful tonight. Word couldn't get out, and the streets about weren't warned to expect us.
"I see" the slim aristocrat purred in triumph. "So it will be impossible for you to detain me, d'ye see. Nor summon any local authorities 'pon me. Nor hold me 'gainst my will. You alone have authority to detain, to lay hands upon me, sir, but your writ does not extend to your minions. And your bully-bucks have already laid hands upon me, striven to prevent me from dressing, or departing. That constitutes, of itself, a wrongful-taking… for which you, and you alone, are liable before a court of justice, sir." He was singsonging with glee.
Damme, he's well versed, too! Damn his eyes!
"And I feel it my obligation to caution you, sir, that I am from a most influential and powerful City family. With a circle of friends far more powerful than are yours, I'd expect, with legal assistance far beyond your miserable purse. You are in difficulties enough already. Detain me a moment longer, and whatever befalls you will be a greater measure of chastisement than ever you might imagine. Now let me pass, I say!"
He has me by the short hairs, Lewrie gloomed to himself; all he had said was true. He could be bound up in court for months. Oh, the Admiralty would pay his legal expenses, bail him out of debtors' prison if he lost the judgment, and if the fop demanded a huge settlement. But he'd be out thousands over the matter. And he couldn't risk losing every farthing he had.
"You speak for the others, too, I take it?" Lewrie found spirit enough to sneer in return.
"My dear sir, I care little for any but myself," the man confessed gaily. "These sailors are properly in your limited jurisdiction. They and the rest… well, it was dull sport, after all. I will take my manservant yonder, and depart. Should you have no objections?"
"Get out," Lewrie grumbled at last. "Get out, and be damned to you, you…!"
"Adieu," the elegant young bugger smirked, making a "leg" and sweeping his showy, egret-feathered hat across his breast. "Bonne nuit. Though not, you will understand… au revoir… n'est-ce pas?"
"Sufferin'…" Lewrie sighed, slamming his truncheon into his palm, over and over, as the courtier and his shivering "man" departed.
"Aye, 'at stinks, sir," the bosun muttered sourly. "Nothin' ye could do, else. Not with th' likes o' himl"
"He left one of 'em behind, at any rate," Lewrie observed, as he walked deeper into the orgy chamber to gaze down upon an unconscious form huddled hard up against a cot.
"Well, 'at'uncutupabitrough, 'e did, Mister Lewrie. Hadta bash 'im a good'un. Gawd! 'Ese pore tykes. Just babes, some of 'em. Wish we could go 'fore a magistrate. Local parish might take 'em in, set 'em right, 'fore they gets buggery in their blood."
"This parish?" Lewrie scoffed, still squirming over his defeat. "What could they do? Already Irish bogtrotter poor. Full of future victims. Can't have boy brothels in rich parishes. Like that sneerin' shit, just left? Prays the loudest in his family pew, I'd wager, and plays upright for all to see. Can't take his sort of pleasure in a good parish. But that's what the East End is for, ain't it?" And I should know, Lewrie shrugged in wry self-awareness. In my early days, I was all over the East End whores, Drury Lane to Cheapside. 'Least, they were girlsl And I paid well. Full value and more.
"What say we let 'ese litt'lest beggars go, Mister Lewrie?" the bosun almost begged. "Coupla cabin boys, 'eir sort'd not be missed f r long, no with s'many volunteers. We take 'em in, sir, all they get is caned, then discharged, anyways. T'other tykes, well…"
"Aye, bosun, turn 'em out," Lewrie decided, unable to look the quivering, fearful children in the eyes. "Tongue-lash before they go, though. Put some fear o' God in 'em. But we take the rest with us."
"Aye, aye, sir."
Lewrie went to the last, unconscious, civilian by the cot. He rolled him over with his foot, hoping for signs that he might yet be a seaman, subject to impressment. And his pitifully weak writ.