“Are you worried about our trip?” he asked gently, wondering if suddenly the idea of going away with him didn't appeal to her. He hadn't asked but suddenly wondered if maybe she was even a virgin and was nervous about sleeping with him. He kissed her, and then put his arms around her before she answered. “Whatever is bothering you, Cricky, I'm sure it's something we can work out together. Why don't we give it a try?” He looked down at her with the love and tenderness of a father for his child, which made her heart ache even more. All she wanted was to take this trip alone with him.
She was about to tell him that he didn't understand when Max signaled to her from behind Parker's back, and there was a definite urgency to his gesture. She stood there with Parker's arms around her and nodded to Max, trying to suggest that she would be with him in a minute. She slowly unwound herself from Parker's arms, and much to his consternation, said she would be back in a minute, she had to say something to Max that she had previously forgotten, and it was urgent. Something about a medication they were trying to get for him in town. Parker didn't question it, but went to sit down on a chair while he waited. Ushi came by soon after that with Ernst, and they had a pleasant chat, while Cricky disappeared into the deserted dining tent with Max and Sam.
“What?” She looked anxious, and both men looked nervous. Max spoke for both of them.
“We should probably be committed for this, but we're going to let you do it.” What had decided it for both of them was that she was going to peaceful areas, and they were both well aware that this was a once-in-a-lifetime chance for her. Once back in Liechtenstein, she would never be alone again. Forever. Letting her go away with Parker was their gift to her. And given the circumstances and the location of their intended trip, they both felt that she would be safe with Parker, and he would take care of her. He was a totally responsible man, and they knew she would be in good hands. “There's only one condition, two actually.” He smiled at her, and Samuel was smiling, too. “One is that you absolutely must take a radio, and a gun.” The radio might be unreliable in the area, and unable to reach them. But they knew the gun was failsafe, and that she was well able to use it if she had to. She was an excellent shot and knew a fair amount about guns.
“The second condition is that we want you to be aware that if anything happens to you on this trip, we're going to shoot ourselves rather than go back and face your father. So you have two lives on your hands as well as your own.” They both knew that it was a completely insane thing for them to do, and defeated their whole purpose in coming here, but they had decided to take a risk for her, and give her and Parker this opportunity to be alone. She was well aware of what they were doing, and threw her arms around first Max's neck and then Sam's, with tears running down her cheeks again. This time, tears of joy.
“Thank you, thank you … thank you …” They left her breathless with excitement and delight, and she ran out of the dining tent and back to where Parker was sitting with the others. He could instantly see the happiness in her eyes.
“Well, you look happy, Cricky,” he said, looking pleased. All her anxiety seemed to have dissipated, although he had no idea why. “What did Max tell you that made you look like that?”
“Nothing. I got his medication for him, so he paid me back my poker earnings that he owed me. I'm a rich woman now!”
“I'm not sure the rate of exchange on nakfa is that great these days to justify looking like that, but far be it from me to burst your bubble, if it makes you that happy.” Whatever it was, he was delighted that she seemed so comfortable again. She was floating on a cloud until they left. And they set out for Qohaito two days later. Just as Fiona had predicted it would, it felt like a honeymoon to her, and even to him.
They had borrowed one of the old dilapidated cars at the camp and made their way slowly through the countryside, feeling like children on an adventure. It was the most romantic trip Christianna had ever taken, and with each day she came to know Parker better and love him more. They made love the first night in a tiny hotel, with total abandon, and all the love that had grown between them since their whirlwind romance began.
It was almost like a honeymoon, as they drifted from one fascinating location to another, and collected memories like flowers. It was the perfect time. They planned to spend three days together before going back to Senafe. And it was on the second night of the trip that Parker found her gun, in a small case in her suitcase. She had asked him to hand her her nightgown, forgetting what she'd concealed in it, and he looked a little stunned as he held it in his hand.
“Do you always carry a gun?” he asked, gingerly setting it back in her suitcase. He had no idea if it was loaded or not, nor how to tell. Guns were definitely not his thing. He repaired people, not destroyed them. Although she hadn't seemed the type for guns either. He was truly surprised.
“No,” she laughed at him, taking the nightgown from him as she got out of the bath in their hotel. She didn't know why she was bothering with the nightgown, it would be somewhere on the floor for the rest of the night, five minutes after they got into bed. “Of course not. Max gave it to me in case we have a problem.”
“I'm not sure I would feel comfortable shooting someone,” he said, sounding a little nervous. “Would you?” She didn't tell him she was an excellent shot, although she wasn't fond of guns herself. But her father had forced her to learn.
“Not really. But he meant well. I just threw it in the suitcase and forgot about it,” she said blithely, putting her arms around his neck, and kissed him.
“Is it loaded?” He was still uneasy about it, and her explanation seemed a little casual to him, and offhand.
“Probably.” She knew it was, but didn't want to scare him. He pulled her close to him then, held her, and looked into her eyes. He knew there was something deeper there than what she was telling him. He already knew her well.
“Cricky, there's something you're not telling me, isn't there?” he asked calmly. Her eyes never left his, she hesitated for a long time, and then nodded. “Do you want to tell me what it is?” He never loosened his grip, on her body, or her heart, or this time her eyes.
“Not now,” she said in a whisper, clinging to him. She didn't want to spoil everything, and it would. It had to. One day she had to tell him that she was going back to her life as a princess, to serve her country and her father as reigning prince, and there would be no room for him. She couldn't bring herself to say the words. “Not yet.”
“When are you going to tell me?”
“Before we leave Senafe, whichever of us leaves first.” Presumably, it would be him. He nodded. He had decided not to press her about it. He sensed that it was something deep and sad for her that troubled her a great deal. It was the sadness he saw in her eyes sometimes. A look of loss, sorrow, and resignation. He didn't want to pry her secret from her, he wanted her to give it to him willingly, when she was ready. And she was deeply grateful for his understanding. He was truly an amazing man, and she loved him more than ever, in gratitude for the gentle way he loved her.
The rest of their trip was even more beautiful than they had hoped for or expected. They headed back reluctantly, had taken a million photographs on the way, and rolled slowly back into camp late Monday afternoon, feeling as though they had been gone for months. It really felt as though they were returning from their honeymoon. Christianna felt married to him in her very soul. He kissed her as they got out of the car, and he carried her bag to the women's tent. She hated the idea that she wouldn't be able to sleep with him that night, and wake up beside him in the morning. That felt like punishment to her now.