“Alex, calm down. Look. I know this is probably up there with the worst things that can happen to you, but you have time.”
“What do you mean I have time?”
“None of this affects you now. You won’t want anything I want right now.” He let go of my knees and leaned back—
away from me. “But it doesn’t work that way for me. Being near you means the connection is choking the crap out of me. Like right now, your heart is racing. So is mine. Being this close to you is like… being inside your head, but you stil have time.”
Processing al of this wasn’t easy. I mean, I got what he was saying. Since he’d gone through the whole palingenesis thing, whatever it was between us was already wrapping its super-special cord around him, but not me. Not until I turned eighteen. Then? “Why didn’t Lucian tel me any of this?”
“You didn’t stick around, Alex.”
I made a face at him. “I don’t like any of this, Seth. We’re talking seven months here. In seven months, I’l be eighteen.”
“I know. Seven months of me helping you train, so try to imagine what the hel I’l be feeling this whole entire time.”
I tried, but couldn’t. “This isn’t going to work.”
He leaned forward and tucked a strand of blond hair behind his ear. “That’s what I’m thinking. I came up with an idea. Now, hear me out on this. I can deal with this for right now, because even though it’s strong, it’s not that strong.
It’s doable—for me, but after you Awaken, things wil change. If we can’t handle it—if you can’t handle it, then we’l separate. I’l leave. You won’t be able to because of school, but I can. I’l go to the other end of the earth.”
“But the Council—Lucian—he wants you here, with me.” I rol ed my eyes. “For whatever reason. He’s ordered you here.”
Seth shrugged, and then he flopped down onto his back.
“Whatever. Screw the Council. I’m the Apol yon. What the hel can Lucian do to me?”
Those were dangerous, rebel ious words. I kind of liked them. “You’d actual y do that for me?”
He turned his gaze to me, smiling slightly. “Yes. I would actual y do that. You seem surprised.”
One of my legs dropped off the side of the bed as I leaned over him. “Yes. Why would you? It sounds like everything comes up rosy for you.”
“Do you think I’m a bad person or something?” He continued to smile up at me.
I blinked, a bit taken aback. “No… I don’t think that.”
“Then why would you think I’d force this upon you? Being apart won’t stop the connection from growing stronger, but it wil stop the shifting of power. Things… wil be intense once the transfer happens. If I leave, we wil each stil be our own person.”
Out of nowhere, it struck me. “This is for you. You don’t think you’l be able to handle it.”
He only acknowledged my words with a sardonic twist to his lips.
This connection thing must actual y bother him if he real y thought he wouldn’t be able to handle it down the road.
Wrong as it may be, it kind of made me feel better about the situation. In the end, if things became too much, there was a way out. I stil had control. So did Seth.
“What are you thinking?”
Snapping out of my thoughts, I looked down at him. “The next seven months are real y going to suck for you.”
Seth tipped his head back and laughed. “Ah, I don’t know about that. This— this thing—has its benefits.”
I sat back, folding my arms. “How so?”
He smiled.
“What are you thinking?”
“That we’ve actual y held an entire conversation without insulting one another. Next thing you know, you’l actual y consider me a friend.”
“Baby steps, Seth. Baby steps.”
He turned back to staring at my ceiling. There were no stars that glowed, just ordinary old, dul white paint. Without thinking, I moved again, reaching out and touching the hand resting near my thigh. Cal it an experiment, but I wanted to see what would happen.
Seth’s head whipped in my direction. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing.” And nothing was what happened. Confused, I wrapped my fingers around his.
“Doesn’t look like nothing,” His eyes narrowed on me.
“I guess so.” Giving up on my impromptu test, I lifted my hand. “Shouldn’t you be—” Whatever I was about to say died on my lips. Incredibly fast, Seth grabbed my hand and threaded his fingers through mine.
“Is this what you wanted?” he asked, ever so casual y.
It happened. Being so close to him this time, I could see where the markings came from. The thick veins in his hand were the first to darken, branching out before spreading up his arm. Mesmerized, I watched the inky tats cover every piece of exposed skin. Before my eyes, they shifted away from his veins, swirling around his skin. Breaking off into different designs as he—we—continued to hold hands.
“What do they mean?” I looked up. His eyes were closed.
“The markings?”
“They are… the marks of the Apol yon.” He answered slowly, as if he were having trouble forming words and sentences. “They are runes and spel s… meant to offer protection… or in our case, alert each other to our presence… or something. They mean other stuff, too.”
“Oh.” The runes glided down his skin, toward the tips of his fingers. Cal me crazy, but I was confident that those markings were reacting to where our skin touched, and for a split second, I real y believed those glyphs would jump his skin and spread across my flesh.
“Wil … I look like this one day?”
“Hmm?”
I pul ed my gaze from our hands and looked up. Seth’s eyes were stil closed, his expression relaxed. Actual y, it was more than that. He looked… content. Pleased. I’d never seen him so calm. “Is this one of the benefits?” I meant it as a joke, but the realization smacked me upside the head before he could respond. It was because he was close to me. Something as simple as that did affect him . I affected him that way.
I recal ed what he’d said after my run-in with Kain. “I real y do have al the power in this.”
His eyes opened and they shone like two giant, tawny jewels. “What?”
My fingers tightened around his, and his lips parted, al owing a sharp sigh to leak out. Then, slowly, careful y, I loosened my hold on his fingers. Interesting. “Nothing.”
“I never should have told you the truth about that.” His voice held a certain rough edge to it. “You do, at least for now.”
I ignored the last part and pul ed my hand free before the marks could touch my skin. We didn’t say anything for a couple of minutes. I leaned back against the pil ows and Seth closed his eyes once more. During that stretch of silence, I watched the steady rise and fal of his chest. He almost looked like he was sleeping. Relaxed as he was, the beauty of his face didn’t look so cold or methodical.
This time, I was the first to break the silence.
“So… what are you doing?”
“Now?” He sounded sleepy. “I’m making up plans. Things I’m going to show you—in training, of course.”
My brows rose. “I don’t see how there is anything you can show me that Aiden can’t.”
Seth laughed then, and when he spoke, his voice was smug and knowing. “Oh, Alex, I have a lot to show you.
Things that Aiden wil never be able to teach you.”
Staring down at him, I admitted to myself that there was a teeny tiny part of me that actual y looked forward to whatever it was that he planned on showing me. I felt confident that it would be entertaining if not fruitful.
We real y didn’t talk after that, and al too soon, the excitement of everything faded, leaving me exhausted. My eyelids started to get too heavy to keep open, and I wanted nothing more than to kick Seth over, so I could lie down. As it was, he took up quite a bit of space sprawled across the middle of my bed.