I caused a sensation with these kids as the two patrolmen shoved me into the charge-room: that I could understand. With my candy floss wig at the back of my head, Rhea’s blood on my shirt, a bruise on the side of my jaw where one of the patrolmen had hit me and handcuffs on my wrists I made a photo that would cause a sensation anywhere.
There was an immediate buzz from the kids and O’Halloran, leaning forward, bawled, ‘Quiet, you little bastards! Hear me or I’ll get amongst you!’
It seemed to me I was back on square A.
One of the patrolmen came forward and began talking to O’Halloran. I only caught a few of his words: ‘Tamiami Trail... shot dead... gun in his hand.’ Lowering his voice, he went on talking and O’Halloran wrote it all down.
I knew he was booking me for Rhea’s murder and I didn’t care. I was past caring about anything. During the long drive back to Luceville I had had time to think. Rhea’s suicide had jolted me back to the man I had been before the crash that had killed Judy. Now, I saw myself as I was. This subconscious greed that must have always been with me had come to the surface. Because of this greed I had caused Sydney’s death. Because of this greed I had murdered Fel Morgan. I thought of the moment when I had hooked my fingers into his trousers’ cuffs and had heaved him into oblivion.
This moment, as I was driven back to Luceville, was my moment of truth.
Finally, O’Halloran got through with his writing, then he beckoned to me. I didn’t move. I stared at him until the patrolman guarding me, gave me a shove forward.
‘Your name?’ O’Halloran demanded in his worn-out husky voice.
‘Laurence fifteen-hundred dollars Carr,’ I told him.
He leaned forward, his little pig eyes opening wide, then he seemed to recognise me.
‘Take that goddamn wig off,’ he said to the patrolman who pulled the wig off my head and put it on the desk.
O’Halloran drew in a long, slow breath, then staring at me, he said. ‘You got anything to say, but watch it, whatever you say could be used against you.’
‘She was as sick of life as I am,’ I said. ‘She wanted to die so I shot her.’
He snorted, then sat back, waving to the patrolman.
‘He’s a nutter. Take him to Homicide.’
So I was taken to the Homicide department. The Lieutenant in charge was a small, white-haired man with steel blue eyes, a red face and an aggressive jaw.
He asked a lot of questions, but by this time I wasn’t in the mood to talk. I sat dumb, staring down at the floor and even when he slapped me across the face, I still said nothing. So, finally, they put me in a cell.
I sat there, hating myself because I had caused the death of a man who had gone so much for me and who had left me the bulk of his riches.
They brought me a meal which I didn’t eat.
Later, O’Halloran came into the cell and with his thumbs hooked into his belt, he regarded me.
‘You’re in real trouble, buster,’ he said and his husky voice sounded surprisingly gentle. ‘What did you want to sound off for? There’s still time... suppose you give it to me the way it happened?’
I looked directly at him.
‘I killed her,’ I said. ‘The rest of the performance is up to you people.’
O’Halloran scratched under his right armpit.
‘The Lieutenant wants to know if you’ll make a statement.’ He shifted his cap to the back of his head. ‘Listen, buster, if I were you, I wouldn’t, but I’m doing what I’m told.’
I could see he was worried.
‘Why wouldn’t you?’ I asked.
He took off his cap, stared at it, then slapped it on his head.
‘Between you and me, I think you’re a nutter and I don’t believe you knocked her off. That’s why I think you should sit tight and keep your trap shut until you get an attorney here.’
‘You think I’m a nutter?’
He nodded.
‘Yeah... all along. The moment you hit this town, that’s what I thought. Now take my advice. You sit tight. We’ve called Paradise City. There’s a bit shot attorney coming with your partner, Mr. Luce. They’ll fix this. You sit tight.’
The last thing I wanted was for Tom Luce to get me out of this mess.
‘Tell the Lieutenant I’m now ready to make a statement.’
O’Halloran shifted from one foot to the other.
‘Look, fella, you may be a nutter, but you have something I dig for.’ He leaned forward and lowering his voice, he went on. ‘You don’t understand the trouble you’re in. Look... suppose I call Miss Baxter and tell her... she’ll help you. How’s that, fella?’
Jenny?
I saw now that Jenny had gone the way Judy had gone... a wonderful memory, a dream, but no longer for me.
‘Tell the Lieutenant I’ll make a statement,’ I said.
O’Halloran wiped the sweat off his face with the back of his hand.
‘You could talk yourself into a fifteen year stretch,’ he said and I could see he was really worried. ‘Even if they think you’re a nutter, you couldn’t get out under ten.’
I leaned back against the prison wall, suddenly relaxed.
‘Tell the Lieutenant I’ll make a statement.’ In my mind I saw Sydney with his kindness and his talents, buzzing around me. ‘Fifteen years... ten years? Well, it will make a change of scene, won’t it?’