Tears streamed down her face. Making a sound of dismay, he ran a finger over her wet cheek.
"I can't do this, Cam." She backed up, shaking her head, touching her fingers to the lips he'd just kissed. "I can't. I won't hurt you." And she turned, stumbling toward his door.
"Wait."
She didn't, and as she yanked the door open, he tripped over the chair she'd pushed in his way. "Dammit, wait." Shoving the chair aside, he moved, only to stop short again in the middle of the room when she paused to look at him. One more step on his part and he knew she'd bolt. He lifted his hands in a silent plea, hoping he'd say the right thing. "I believe in you."
She gripped the door. "I'm not a good bet."
"Why? Because your mother says so? She's a joke, Haley. Don't let her influence your life."
"My mother?" She gaped in disbelief. "You- You talked to her?"
He nodded reluctantly, and her eyes widened. He said quickly, "I called her, thinking she could help you-"
"You what? How could you? Never mind, don't answer that." She stiffened. "Just do me one favor-stay the hell out of my life!"
He stiffened, too. "As long as you stay here."
"Are you going to hold me prisoner, Cameron?" she asked softly.
"If that's what it takes to keep you safe, you bet," he replied grimly.
Without another word, she left the office.
Chapter 9
Cam watched Haley go. He'd have to follow her, he thought wearily. If only to make sure she didn't try to leave the ranch, which he simply couldn't allow. He hadn't realized how late it had gotten. The house, as he moved through it, seemed dark and empty. The silence assured him that both his brothers and Nellie slept. But just in case, he didn't flip on any lights. He didn't feel like answering questions from a well-meaning but pesky sister-in-law.
Which was exactly why he tripped over a soft, warm bundle in the kitchen and fell flat on his face. Before he could let out a curse, Max was yipping loudly and licking his face all over.
"Shh!" Grappling in the dark with the wriggling mass of excited puppy, Cam couldn't get a good grip. "Come on, boy, calm down." He couldn't even get up with the excited dog jumping all over him. "Max, if you don't put a cork in it, I swear I'll wrap that tongue around your scrawny little neck."
Undaunted by a threat spoken in the kind voice he'd grown to love, Max jumped on Cam's chest and continued to both bark and lick whatever skin he could reach-which was plenty.
Finally, drenched in puppy slobber, Cam managed to grab hold of the puppy and sit up. "It's all right now, boy," he whispered, feeling Max quiver. "I probably scared you as much as you startled me." He stroked the dog, thankful when the high-pitched barking stopped. "Did I hurt you when I stepped on you?"
He got another kiss for his question and found himself able to laugh despite the ache in his chest. "Up for a walk?" That proved to be a silly question, and one that started the dog hopelessly wriggling with happiness. "Okay, two rules. One, no more barking. Two, no peeing on me. Got it?" Even in the dark, he had no trouble detecting Max's eagerness. "Let's go find Haley."
At the name, Max perked up even more, if that was possible. The night was cold, dark and bleak. It matched Cam's spirits. Max didn't notice. He ran from tree to tree, leaving his mark, making happy little sounds in his throat that almost had Cam wishing for the carefree, easy life of a dog.
Haley's cottage looked deserted, but he knocked, convinced she'd gone straight to bed. Not surprised when she didn't respond, he knocked again. "Come on, Haley," he called out. "I just want to make sure you're all right. Open up."
After two more minutes, he decided the hell with being polite. "Haley?" Max pushed ahead of him, whining softly. "It's just me."
No sound, no light. Moving quickly now, goaded by fear. Cam stepped from the main room into the small hallway. The bedroom door was closed, but that, too, opened with just a push. She'd left the shutters wide-open so what little light the stars provided spilled into the room.
At first he thought she was in bed, but as he sat on the edge and flipped on the lamp, he realized his mistake quickly enough. It seemed the housekeeper didn't bother with making her own bed. The empty pile of blankets and tangled sheets only looked like a body.
Haley hadn't come back.
"Damn." He looked at Max, who had his nose deep in the trash by his feet. A bright yellow legal pad in it caught his attention.
It looked like a ledger, and it was filled with writing he now knew to be Haley's. He picked it up and brought it closer to the lamp. Haley's journal.
His first reaction was to put it down. He could still remember the diary he'd started in the back of his math notebook. He'd been thirteen and in lust with Sally Michaels. Jason had found the notes, copied them, and sold them to his classmates for a dime each. It had taken all eighth grade to get over that humiliation. And on top of it all, Sally had dumped him.
No, he couldn't read the journal. But still, he hesitated, holding it, staring at the writing. Here at last was a chance to maybe find out the truth about the woman he wanted in his life. The pad was flipped open to a page with writing halfway down. He stared at it, warring with himself and his scruples.
Then his name stuck out from the writing.
She'd written about him. Max looked at him, tilting his head, obviously wondering what the big deal was. It was a weak excuse, but simple curiosity won, and Cam scanned the page.
It was the last thing he expected of her-a personal diary. The most recent entry was dated days ago, a day he remembered all too well. Their trip to the library. The day he'd held her in his arms as she'd cried in grief and fear. He read her words.
I can't stop myself from thinking about Cam, can't seem to stop myself from dreaming about what it would be like to make love with him.
Cam's mouth fell open. Utterly incapable of stopping now, he read on.
Since I can't imagine he'd really want to be with me, I guess I'd have to seduce him. Ha! As if I'd even know how. I'd probably start with candles.
Cam groaned out loud.
In my fantasy, I'd have the sort of body that would make a grown man beg, so that when I took off my clothes, the gentle light would flicker over my body. I'd be so beautiful, he wouldn't be able to turn away. We'd step into a hot, deep tub and he'd lose himself in me. I wish-
The writing stopped abruptly. Dazed, Cam lifted his head and stared at her rumpled bed. She wanted him. She'd fantasized about him. He could almost see the candlelight flickering over her body, see her dripping wet from the tub, feel himself sinking into her… God. If he'd ever been more turned-on, he couldn't remember.
Then he looked up and went still. Haley stood in the doorway. Her dark hair framed her lovely face, the flowered dress she still wore dipped enticingly low in front. He could imagine lifting her up, carrying her into the bathroom and fulfilling her fantasy. That her bathroom had a shower, not a tub, and that there wasn't a candle in the place wouldn't have stopped him.
But her expression did.
"What are you doing here?" she asked, her voice low and controlled. Only the way she gripped her hands told him she was upset.
"I… ah…" He'd lost track of that when all the blood had drained from his head, rushing to his lap.
Her eyes narrowed on what he held, then widened as she took it all in; him sitting on her bed, holding the journal she'd written. "That's mine."
"I'm sorry." He stood just as she grabbed the pad of paper from his hands. "I-"
"Oh, my God," she whispered, staring down at the opened pad. Her face reddened, but still she met his gaze evenly. "You read this."