She blushed at that. Jeana was innocent, but not all that innocent. Somebody, at least, had taught her how to kiss.
I wrapped my arms around her again. “Here’s the real Carl Buckman Experience. It’s about caring and sharing and listening and talking and protecting and being a friend. Anything else is just a wonderful extra. Can we start out with all of those things, and then worry about the extras later?”
She eagerly nodded. “Yes!”
“Now, would you like me to tell you about how the Carl Buckman Experience starts out? The first part?” Those big brown eyes looked at me eagerly. I stood up and held her in my arms, then lowered my hands down to her very warm and soft rear. Jeana squealed when I did so. I leaned down and whispered in her ear. “The first thing I do is pull your jeans down…” I rubbed her butt and she whimpered. “… and then I give you a good hard spanking!” I brought both hands down hard, and Jeana squawked in outrage. I kept my arms around her, keeping her from hitting me. “And that’s what you get the next time you talk to me about it!”
“You bastard!” she complained, rubbing her butt.
“Now, go upstairs and wash the tears off your face, so your father doesn’t shoot me as soon as he sees you!” I sent her scampering up the stairs and I cleaned up the basement. I ended up in the kitchen carrying our glasses, just as she came back down the stairs. Her parents came in a few moments later to see us chatting in the kitchen.
I declined an invitation to dinner and took off. I was late for my family’s dinner and was punished by being denied dessert. When Mom asked me where I was, I just smiled and said I was at Jeana’s, and that it was worth being punished. Both she and Dad snorted at that. Hamilton complained when I wasn’t drawn and quartered.
Chapter 16: Be Careful What You Wish For
The next step in my estrangement from my brother occurred in another couple of weeks. Monday, the 22nd, during Thanksgiving week, I asked my parents if I could bring Jeana to Thanksgiving dinner. This was pretty much a first for me. Shelley Talbot had come over several times back when we were seeing each other, but we had also been working on the Science Fair together, and besides, since neither of us could drive, a parent always was around. Jeana was the only girl I had ever asked to bring over.
Hamilton immediately said no, since it was against the rules. Everybody ignored him, and my parents said it would be all right. Mom asked if I had already asked Jeana. I answered, “No, I wanted to clear it with you, first, before asking.” That certainly satisfied my mother, and we all continued to ignore Hamilton.
In retrospect, that was a mistake. The next night at dinner, Mom asked if Jeana was coming to Thanksgiving dinner. I just shook my head. “No, Jeana and her parents are driving up to Long Island to spend the weekend with family. They leave Wednesday after school.”
“That’s too bad. Maybe you can invite her over for Sunday supper afterwards.”
“Yeah, it’s too bad,” parroted a smirking Hamilton. “You won’t be able to use these, will you?!” Everybody at the table turned to look at him, and we stared as he reached into a pocket and pulled out a wad of foil wrapped condoms and dumped them on the dining room table. “I found these downstairs.”
My mother gasped, but that was the only sound in the room. I actually saw red for a moment, but managed to grab the table with both hands, and held on until my fingers turned white. By the time my vision cleared, I could see that my father was actually watching me, to see if I would kill my brother. I certainly wanted to.
I don’t know how he did it. Did I leave the padlock loose on the foot locker? Or had he finally figured out how to pick the lock? I never found out. I calmed my breathing and turned to him. The room was still staring at us, and the rubbers on the table. Even Ham was starting to look like maybe he had overplayed his hand. “Have you absolutely lost your mind? Dumping a box of condoms on the table in front of your mother, your grandmother, and your little sister? What in God’s name are you thinking?” I asked quietly.
The mention of my sister and grandmother roused Mom from her shocked silence. “Suzie, help your grandmother upstairs to her room, and stay with her.” Nana really was out of it these days, and I’m not sure she really understood what was happening.
“But Mom…!”
“Suzie, go now, and take your grandmother. Don’t make me tell you again.” Then she turned to Ham. “Go to your room now, mister.”
Before he could get up, I said, “No, Hamilton, go into the living room and stay there. Do not go downstairs.”
This was very confusing to the others, so Mom simply said, “Go to your room.”
Again, I interjected, “Go to the living room and sit down and stay there.” I looked at my mother. “It’s obvious he has gotten into my stuff. If he goes down there now, we won’t know what else he’ll destroy or steal before I can check.”
Hamilton immediately protested his innocence, stating I had just left the box of rubbers out in the open. Mom looked at my father, who said, “Hamilton, go up to your mother’s and my bedroom, and sit down, and if you even think about touching anything, you won’t sit for a week. Now, go.”
Again he tried to protest, but my father was furious. If he could have reached him through me, Dad would have smacked him right then and there. Hamilton went upstairs.
Once he was gone, Mom looked at me coldly, and said, “How dare you do this!?”
I stared at her in amazement. “Excuse me?”
“How dare you bring those… things… into my house!”
I simply couldn’t believe it! Hamilton breaks into my locked possessions, ransacks through them, and then has the gall to dump rubbers on the dining room table — and it’s my fault! “You are kidding me, right?” I asked.
Mom swung at me, but since my seat was actually closer to the other end of the table, I just moved my head back and she missed completely. She tried a second time, half rising out of her chair, and I caught her wrist. “Mother, we’ve been over this before. You are not going to ever hit me again.” I glanced over at my father, who was easily in reach to deck me.
“Shirley, settle down.” He looked at me coldly. “Don’t ever touch your mother again, or it will be me you’ll be dealing with.”
“It will be the last day I live in this house if I do.” I replied.
I let Mom’s arm go, and she moved to hit me again, but Dad barked out, “I said to knock it off, both of you.”
I sat back in my chair and looked at him. “I just want to know how it is that he busts into my foot locker, steals my possessions, dumps them on the table, and it is my fault. Just explain it to me, please!”
“Don’t push it, mister. That’s the only thing you have going for you in this mess as it is,” he answered.
“Again, excuse me?” I asked incredulously. “Explain to me what I have done wrong!”
“Those!” cried Mom, pointing at the rubbers still on the table. “Get them off my dining room table! How dare you have them out!”
I reached out and grabbed the little envelopes and stuffed them in my pants pocket, holding one back. “These, Mom? These. You know perfectly well what they are. They are prophylactic condoms for the purpose of birth control, and you and Dad have been using them for years. It’s not like it’s a secret.”
Mom gasped, but Dad just rolled his eyes. “What!?” she demanded, sputtering.