I set my hand on my stomach.
“You, on the other hand, present a very big problem.”
“Gruoch?” a voice called.
For a moment, I stilled. Remembering this place and this moment with Gillacoemgain, I rose, half expecting to find his shade there.
Instead, I found Banquo.
“Banquo?”
He grinned.
I rose and crossed the field to greet him.
He cast a glance around. Once he was sure we were alone, he planted a kiss on my lips. “I was met on the road by a fey thing. She told me what happened and that I should come here.”
“It’s good you’ve come. We need to perform rites for Tavis today. Will you…”
Banquo nodded. “Of course. How is Madelaine?”
“As expected. It breaks my heart to see her like this. But you must tell me, how was Sid? Did she delay you overlong?” I asked, arching a playful eyebrow at Banquo.
He coughed uncomfortably. “She tried.”
“And did she succeed?”
“Not in full. I like that woman, but my heart belongs elsewhere.”
Somehow, it felt unfair that Banquo and I loved one another so much—without Sid. Echoes of past lives wanted to impose themselves on me. I reminded myself that I was not obligated to choices I made in another time and space. I loved Sid well, but this life was mine. And so was Banquo.
“This is where you grew up,” Banquo said, looking back at the castle.
“Alas.”
Banquo raised an eyebrow at me.
“Madelaine’s first husband, Allister, was a very cruel man. It was not an easy upbringing,” I explained.
“I’m surprised he would dare be anything but kind to the sister and niece of the king.”
“Perhaps it was different while my father was alive. Afterward…”
Banquo frowned. “I’m sorry for you both.”
I nodded but said nothing more on the matter. It was rare for Banquo and me to find moments alone. I didn’t know how long Banquo would be able to stay, and we would have little chance to talk away from the prying eyes of others. While the timing was not ideal, there may not be another chance.
“Banquo,” I whispered. “I must tell you something.”
Banquo stilled. “Is something wrong? I know you’ve seen some visions you have not shared with me.”
For a fleeting moment, I remembered the image of Banquo with the dagger in his chest. I pressed the memory from my thoughts. “No…” I said then took his hand. “For once, it’s something good, actually.” I set Banquo’s hand on my stomach. “Something unexpected, but good.”
Banquo looked down at his hand then back up at me. “Cerridwen?” he gasped.
“I am with child.”
Banquo stroked his hand across my stomach then stepped back. He shook his head over and over again, his eyes going wide.
“Banquo?” I stepped toward him.
“No, no, no,” he whispered.
“Banquo?” There was strange energy all around him. He seemed to waver in and out of this plane of reality. “Banquo, stop.” I grabbed his arm. “Banquo.”
He gasped loudly then shuddered. “Cerridwen.”
“What happened? What did you see?”
“Oh, Cerridwen,” he said then pulled me into an embrace. He was shaking.
“Our child? Did you see our child?”
“Such strange and prophetic things. Dark omens. Cerridwen…a child.”
“Yes. A child. Tell me what you saw. Was it something about our child? Tell me.”
“No…just dark signs. I don’t know what lies ahead, but there is trouble in our path.”
I nodded. “We will make a plan. We will keep our child safe. I must return to Glamis for a time, only to set some matters of state in order, then I will return to Moray. We will find a way to hide her, protect her.”
“Her?”
I nodded. “Injibjorg. She saw a daughter for us.”
Banquo stepped back then stroked my cheek. “A daughter. You’re going to give me a daughter?”
I smiled softly at him. “Yes,” I whispered.
“Then may all the gods protect her,” Banquo said, touching my stomach gently once more. “May all the gods protect her.”
That night, a funeral pyre was laid out for Tavis. We placed trinkets, food, drink, and items Tavis had loved, alongside him. Madelaine clung to me as we watched Banquo perform the funeral rites.
Dressed in his druid robes, Banquo stood before the pyre. He had painted his face with woad, trimmed his hair with leaves. He stood barefoot, a torch in his hands. The Christian priests who were part of Fife’s entourage were not in attendance, but the Thane and the household staff had come. The Thane of Fife stood on the other side of Madelaine, his hand on her back in loving support. I admired his generous spirit.
“Great Mother, Father Cernunnos, I consecrate this body and return your son back to you,” Banquo called. “May the flames lift his spirit to the stars. May his body replenish the earth. May he be reborn into a world full of love and life,” Banquo said.
He then lowered his torch, setting the wood on fire.
Madelaine sobbed.
Banquo circled the pyre. Orange flames flickered to life. The wood crackled and popped.
Banquo came to stand at Tavis’ head once more. His arms outstretched, he looked toward the sky. “Great Mother, Father God, receive his body. May his spirit ride on the winds. May the gods bless this man and provide him comfort until the day he is reborn. Tavis, long may you be remembered.”
Sparks flew as orange flame leaped up into the night sky.
The scent of pine and sage filled the air.
Madelaine watched the sparks twirl upward toward the heavens. The light of the flames bounced on her face, her cheeks slick with tears. Her eyes sparkled, and a calm washed over her features, her eyes softening.
We stayed for the longest time, keeping a watchful vigil over a man we had loved. In the end, only Madelaine, Banquo, and I remained.
“I will see him again in the next life,” Madelaine whispered. “We’ll be reunited once more. And next time, for the better.”
I kissed Madelaine on the cheek.
She took one last look, then turned and went back to the castle.
Banquo took my hand. “I will stay with him until the flame grows cold. But the fire of the dead can’t warm the spirit. Why don’t you go back inside?”
“I hate to leave you alone.”
“I am not alone,” Banquo said, motioning to the pyre.
“Come to me tonight.”
“But your guards.”
“Come anyway.”
Banquo nodded.
I turned then and headed back to the castle. I paused just once to look behind me. Banquo stood staring at the flames. At his side, for just a flickering moment, I saw Tavis.
Later that night, once he had finished with the rites and bathed, Banquo joined me in my chamber. Killian, who was keeping watch outside, gave me a puzzled expression when I answered the door. Killian looked from me to Banquo. I motioned for Banquo to go inside.
“My lady, is everything all right?” Killian asked.
“Yes. Goodnight, Killian,” I told him.
“I…Goodnight, Gruoch,” he said, inclining his head. I couldn’t help but notice the look of jealousy that washed across his face. No doubt he had heard the rumors. Perhaps he had hoped they weren’t true. Of course, if he had affection for me, he had no doubt wished they were untrue. But jealousy was a tricky thing. When I returned to Moray, Killian might need to stay behind.